Capital One is NOT IN MY WALLET!!!

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Yup, I said it. Capital One is NOT in my wallet, nor will it ever be either. I had the great pleasure (and this is said with great sarcasm) of talking to several of their customer service representatives, Account Managers and even their Fraud Division over a credit card that I never applied for. Oh but guess who did....my ex husband did. The same person that I have not seen or heard from for 4 years opened a credit card in my name 1-1/2 years ago. According to Capital One policies and I'll quote "Since the account was opened when you were legally married, yes, you are legally responsible for this account" Say what? Okay so committing a felony by signing my name on a card application doesn't apply here. Really? When first received a call from Capital One I informed them that I didn't hold a card with them. They were quick to respond and said they will file through their fraud department, mail me some forms they needed to do an investigation and then go after the right party. Great, right? Yeah, never received any 'forms' but did get a nicely worded letter from their company that they 'investigated' and found me legally responsible for this account. Wonder what they investigated. On one of their more hounding calls I finally just wanted information so could get this taken care of another way. Now get this - Capital One will not send me any kind of statement of this account because it's not the same address as when the account was set up. So they are saying not only am I responsible to pay on this account but they refuse to give me access to any kind of documented information on the charges to the account. Now, any person that needs this for legal action going before a judge would have to have some form of statement, showing the bogus billing address the account information is being sent too. Right? Nope, wrong. Not in the crazy mixed up world of Capital One's 'Policies'. I did enjoy one particular manager that told me to access the account online. Okay, so how do we do that. He was walking me thorough the steps then he said "because we froze the card for lack of payment and then a payment was made online to open the account back up again. However, a cash advance was taken out that brought the account over the spending limit." Red flag...red flag...red flag. So I had to ask the question right? "So you want me to set up access online, to an account that has had payments made to it online. Can you explain to me how I can 'create' an account that is already there? Wouldn't that be a red flag for someone trying to hack an account if I'm trying to access an account already there?" at this point this particular representative started to be not so helpful. He then told me that the account in question had a username and password. Really? One would never have guessed. So, I ask. "So could you please tell me what the username and password is so I can log in and print a copy of the statement that you're company won't give me so when I go before a judge he can press charges for this fraudulent account." I guess my mild mannerisms were wearing pretty thin at this point too. He then states and I about chocked on my laughter here, seriously. "The username I can give you but I can not give you the password because of our privacy policies. But you can change your password." Again, I have to ask. "and if I re-set the password or change it, I can have that link e-mailed to me then right?" He states and I quote. "Yes you can reset the password to the account. Just follow the link when it's received at the e-mail attached to the account you can change it from there." Really? So, I have to ask "So you want me to re-set the password to this account and it will go to the e-mail address attached to the account when the online account was set up? So in short, I am warning my ex husband that I'm trying to access this account because I don't have any e-mail attached to this account for the obvious reason I never opened it." The way he worded this response was like I had just landed from Mars and not only was I the stupidest person on earth but apparently in the entire universe. "Well we can't just change the account e-mail. We still have our privacy policies. We can't just 'access' an account for someone." somewhere near my phone there is a hole in my wall from my head banging against it. Now I know this will all get sorted out sooner or later, but the "policies" and overall non stand by Capital One on fraud ridiculous. So, have you ever had a really, really, really bad experience with a company that you know you're rather have nails hammered in under your fingernails then ever, ever and I mean EVER do business with them?