what can't you accept in a relationship ?

@Mintlin (322)
China
March 11, 2013 9:40pm CST
Hello, recently my friend asked me the question about what can't you accept in a relationship,here is a list: 1. bad temper 2. his/ her appearance is not pretty enough 3.we have nothing in common to talk 4.huge economic gap 5.parents/relatives donot support this relationship 6.there is a social status gap between us In my opinion,i really do not think the guy with the bad temper,it can ruin our relationship,appearance is not a big thing for me,but we must have much common to talk,i do not care much about economic gap but the social status should be equal what do you say my lotters ? have a nice day
1 person likes this
14 responses
@cherigucchi (14876)
• Philippines
12 Mar 13
These are the things i just cannot accept: 1. verbal and physical abuse 2. disrespect to people especially to family and relatives 3. making decisions which is supposed to be decided by the two of us 4. no sense of direction I am going to think more because I have never thought about it for quite sometime.
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
I agreed with all you said.think more and let's discuss it further,have a nice day~
• Indonesia
13 Mar 13
I will never have relationship with a bad temper guy. Economic gap can be finished by time and the looks is does not matter. Bad temper will make 1 side living like hell, I think. Bad temper guy is so unacceptable for me, I want a peace, freedom and want my right to be respected by my partner. I don't need abuser as my life partner.
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
Living with a bad temper guy could be dangerous~ I have seen some women involve the family violence due to this.
@raynejasper (2322)
• Philippines
12 Mar 13
Hi. For me, I'd also chose the temper. That's one of the worst quality that's hard to manage or change. For the others in the list, there could be a remedy and they are not so much contributory to the relationship. You just need to accept the person as he/she is and everything will go well. What I can't accept in the end is, when you have accepted the person as he/she is and cheats you at the end.
1 person likes this
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
yes,other factors like economy,it could be change by times,but personalities quality is not that easy to change
@mods196621 (3652)
• Philippines
12 Mar 13
I can't accept bad temper. Because I am easily affected by his emotions. If our temper unite what will happen? Well for sure we will blast like a bomb. So it's better to not affected by both bad temper..
1 person likes this
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
me too,bad temper always ruin our relationship and life,even a person. My opinion is try to step aways from those bad temper man
@machatago (385)
• Philippines
12 Mar 13
So far in my relationship, I am happy and there aren't any major problems so far. The last one was pretty much with the parents since they can't accept the fact that I was with a much older guy before. But now I have met someone who is close to my age and everything is going well.
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@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
Good for you !It's not easy to find someone suitable for you and the most important thing is everyone support this relationship and you are happy with him.Great!
@doroffee (4222)
• Hungary
12 Mar 13
From this list, what I cannot accept is 1. and 3. 1. is becaue I wanna feel safe in a relationship, and I don't wanna worry when he's gonna hit me or how he's gonna belittle me if he finds my daily meal not so stellar, or if he woulkd try to want to make me a household robot/slave. 3. is because... I'm not sure if I could fall in love with a person I have nothing in common with. Other things I wouldn't accept: lying, cheating, taking me granted and neglecting me.
1 person likes this
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
thank you for your feedback. i can see what you can't accept is all about person not economy or social status etc,that's nice
@marguicha (220884)
• Chile
12 Mar 13
I would not accept a cheater, an abuser or a person who does not respect me and other people. I don`t know about bad temper, but if he had one, he should be able to control it partly if he is respectful. I don`t know about social status, but I think that usually people relate to their peers.
1 person likes this
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
well said,you are right,i would not accept a cheater as well,i hate cheater much. my father used to be a cheater and i've seen how hard my mom spent those days. so if my partner cheats me,i will leave him without any hesitation.
@Iriene88 (5343)
• Malaysia
12 Mar 13
Since I have been married for twenty years, I realised these 1) economy status do have its impact. 2) common interest like musical, movies, hobbies are important for bonding. 3) social and religion background 4) personality, habits and characters differences 5) age gap Therefore, if there are more differences.. both parties must put more effort to make the relationship works.
1 person likes this
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
good day Iriene,thank you for those details.I agreed with what you said above,though i only married for 1 years,but i understand both parties must put more effort to make the relationship works,the differences is a good thing,we can learn from each other different things
@mammots (3209)
• Philippines
12 Mar 13
hello Mintlin! if we wont have anything in common to talk about then the relationship would be very dry and boring and it wont flourish at all. for me being able to talk with my friend about anything and everything in this world and enjoying it matters much. i can't be a friend to anyone who chews my head off every time i open my big mouth to start a conversation.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
12 Mar 13
If we nothing to talk to then that is the end of it. It all starts with physical attraction then when the honeymoon stage is over I need someone who could talk to me about anything. We should be at least in the same wave length. I get bored if I don't get anything from the other party. I am not saying that he or she should be interested in what i say but at least there is a strong opinion in this person that could help the conversation going. Even with friends, if I don't find them talking then I would rather go home and watch some movies or read a good book with a cup of coffee. There is so much to talk about. That is why it is just so impossible to be with a person who just doesn't have anything to say.:)
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
well said,i feel the same way as you. i once made a rule about picking up a partner for myself and one of them is we can talk anything and talk all day long. communciation can improve our relationship
@babyeve (1048)
• Seychelles
12 Mar 13
In a relationship, when things are not working out, most of us wants to change or change our partner. But where is the love in that? If you love that person, then you should accept them. But some people also think that if that person really loves them, then they should change for the better of their relationship. But would this really help their relationship? The answer is, it really depends, but changing someone will really affect your relationship. It also depends on how eager that person would want to change and how they were force to be change. A change for the better is good but it depends on who you want to change. If the problems of your relationship is you yourself, then volunteer and make changes of yourself and turn that bad to good. Always remember this when you are in a relationship. Never force your partner to change, just talk it out and its much better for them to decide if they want to change or not. If they really love you, they will do that for the better of your relationship. But if they hesitate and you just keep on forcing them, your relationship would eventually go down the drain. Let them decide, because nobody knows them better than they do. They know who they are, and what they are in the past and present. Changing them for no reason at all will eventually affect on how they see themselves.
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
you have a point there.never change a person.instead,you should accept it and try to love it
• Romania
12 Mar 13
I could not accept a bad temper because i'm a peaceful person and i also can't stay with a person i don't have nothing in common, it'll be boring. I don't really need the parents/relatives support, if he loves me it's all that matters. I would also add: lying, cheating, being selfish, doesn't respect me.
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
many people choose the column bad temper and have nothing in common, i think so. the partner will accompany us the rest of whole life,surely,he/she has to have a good personality and both parties can communciate well,so the marriage can work.
• India
2 Apr 13
lies,,, I can not stand hearing lie,it ruins all trust and feeling and hope.. and bad temper,,,,, that is also destroy a relationship but there are some people who their nature change by time and by receiving love from us.... and another what I really can not stand in my life is poor mind, I mean not sophisticated in laws... that will creat a huge problem in life if family of men are less than family of lady or opposite.... it is good to marry on standard of family that we belong ..
• United States
12 Mar 13
Well, the ones you listed aren't the ones that I can't accept in a relationship. There are others one, like for instance respecting what I say and do in a type of situation.
1 person likes this
@Mintlin (322)
• China
13 Mar 13
nice day! yes, i just offer some ideas on this event and hope to get and discuss more brilliant ideas from this