Will you marry someone even he/she already have kids?

Philippines
March 21, 2013 11:52pm CST
Just wondering what we should consider if we marry a person who already have kids lots of question need to answer. Will you consider marrying a woman/man with kids? What are the things need to consider if ever your willing to marry him/her?
2 people like this
20 responses
• United States
22 Mar 13
I am already married but if I wasn't I would definitely considered marrying someone rather they had kids are not if I was in love with them. now the kids would have to like me and us get a long and all that for it to work out but there is nothing wrong with it and if I chose to marry I would treat those kids as if they were my own. that is the way it should be.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
That is true well for me its fine to marry someone with kids but there are things to consider like what if the kids wont like me how can i get along with them what should i do to make them love me
• United States
22 Mar 13
yes the kids are the most important thing in any relationship no matter what. I will say 1 thing that you should never do is try to buy their love. I see that way to often and it realy annoys me and some people do it and I guess that is their choice but honestly I would rather them like me not the stuff that I buy them.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
I agree thats right its not a good relationship with kids if they like you because of the stuff you buy for them its nice to give them gifts but its nice to develop relationship with them by knowing them be friend ant treat them nice till they find you as their second mothet
@lelin1123 (15634)
• Puerto Rico
22 Mar 13
Yes, I would for sure. There are people who would not though because they don't like kids or want to deal with someone elses kids. My husband married me and I had two girls already. He said for sure its hard work but we are still together and it will be 25 years next month. If you like kids there shouldn't be a problem. However, if you don't like kids you better move on before it gets too serious.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Thats sound sweet you love each other just wondering how your kids accept you partners?
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Patner i mean
@sjlskl (3382)
• Singapore
22 Mar 13
Why no? Divorce is very common nowadays and it is no longer a surprise if that hottie that you bum onto on the street is one of them. No issues for me.
• Philippines
23 Mar 13
Well i think its depend.in my country theres no devorce.yeah for me i dont kind as long as we love each other
@neelia27 (896)
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
My husband has one kid.. but his child is with his mother.. it never been an issue with me if my husband has a child already.. in fact I admire him for being so responsible eventhough he can't see his child because his in the province my husband make it a point to be a good provider for his child.. I even agreed to my husbad that one of these days we will get his child and we will take care of him..
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
You have a kind heart no doubt you love your husband what you just need to work on is to build a good relation ship with his kid
@youless (104226)
• Guangzhou, China
22 Mar 13
It is impossible for me to marry a man who has kids. Perhaps he is divorced or he is a widow, but he still has kids and therefore everything will be different for me. I may not treat his kids as well as mine. Besides, it is hard for me to deal with it because they may think you are not qualified to tell them what to do or what not to do because you are not their real mom. It will create many troubles. It is hard to have a good relationship with them.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Glad to hear your view what i think is that having patner with kids its ok as long as both side will buid nice relationship with the kids plus consider the adjustment of the kids
@nemrac12 (388)
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
hello mylotter, im a single mother before. I had a 16 year old daughter when i got married with my husband. im so lucky that love of my husband has no boundary ,and love me for what i am and for what i have. for me no need to consider things in order to marry a man/ woman with kids. for as long as you love each other and understand each other.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Good to hear your story its good that you found someone kind who love you and your child but not everyone find happines after marrying someone with kids i think there are things need to consider aswell not just love for both patners its love for kids aswell
@Mavic123456 (21007)
• Thailand
22 Mar 13
why not? I have no problem with that as long as I dont personally pay for their needs. as long as the husband will provide OUR needs.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Its should be equal i guest its not right if only the husband provide everything the wife should work aswell
@jenny1015 (13376)
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
I really don't mind for as long as my partner would have told me about it from the time we started the relationship. And I also hope that his kid would give the respect that I need. I can be a second mom to the kid, no problem.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Yes thats right as long as there is love and respect
• India
22 Mar 13
Well, I think it all depends to understandin. having a kid is not a sin but it is depends how we will be able to adjust with kid and how we will behave and accept them. I know the one who after marriage has made a big seperation between parent and kid and even I have seen a man who become better than a real father for a kid.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
True well i personaly saw my cousin who love her partner and the kids she treat them like her own and until now they live together in one house and they are happy
@Adval2013 (436)
22 Mar 13
There's really nothing wrong with marrying someone who has children already. Nevertheless, you need to be prepared for the many unexpected or surprising situations that might arise when you are already all together under one roof. You need to be genuinely in love with the person and mature enough to accept added responsibility (if there will ever be). To speak for myself, I'd say I'll cross the bridge when I get there. Maybe I will consider facts, my own feelings and my difficult personality. I am definitely a very jealous type of person and knowing myself, it will be very difficult both for me and the other person if we marry given that situation.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
You have points and should consider that the kids are still adjusting if ever they do not so good stuff be patient and talk to the patner first be open to each other
@roshigo58 (4863)
• Pune, India
22 Mar 13
Hi, I am married man I have spend 26 years of married life. But my friend's daughter was 24 years old and she got married with a man who is having a 6 years age daughter. It is said that love is blind. Love is not done on conditions. She is very happy now and spending married life happily.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Happy to hear that shes happy and her married life is success thank you for sharing
@sriroshan (2585)
• India
22 Mar 13
Such question in my case will never arise. But there may be such situation in case of some people who take such step in their life.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
What do you mean? Will you marry him? What things you should consider marrying him or not?
@gamyam (574)
• Hyderabad, India
22 Mar 13
It will be depending upon the partners those are willing to set a new relation of their new needs for living happily. We have to consider all the possibilities of child if there for any objections... I my opinion there need to be keep back step to re-marry other if there is a willingness to reconstruct a new good relation... There is no question of unwanted things before going to marry others.... There will be very happy moments while we are going to make a new and good life long relation with others or strangers to fulfill their new needs....
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Think its not about yes i do!!! Its about considering the kids aswell build good relationship with them before marrying the person you love
• United States
22 Mar 13
If i really loved the guy and if his child liked me being in his/her life i would, but it would depend if the child's mother was in his life still.If she was still coming around, hanging out with him and wanting to be with him i wouldn't.
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Yeah we need to consider the kids future aswell
@Angelpink (4022)
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Hi there ! If i loved the man with or without kids i will marry him. Whoever he loved i would also loved ! What matter is , he is a good man , a good provider and with values . Love doesn't sees any baggage your partner have , it is more positive side , that all will work out right and nothing impossible , they can have a beautiful , peaceful and loving family .
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
That is right love is not accepting what they are its accepting who they are and loving them pure
@alberello (4755)
• Italy
23 Mar 13
Well, I can only answer your question by intuition, since I am neither married nor engaged plus my intention is just to not do those steps in life, so I want to stay single forever. However, dealing with a case such as you described, have to put the kids in the priorities of the couple formed. Love one with the other, ok. But you have to know in advance that we must up children and therefore on this subject, maximum liability!
@anklesmash (1414)
23 Mar 13
I'm single at the moment and the fact a woman had kids would not put me off if I genuinely had feelings for her.I'm of the opinion that if you really care for someone you would accept the children.Because of that It's not an issue that I am going to spend a lot of time thinking about.I am more interested in finding someone that is right for me.If she has kids fine but then again if she dosent have kids fine.
@jadoixa (1167)
• Philippines
23 Mar 13
if you love and care about the person, as for me, it doesn't matter if he has kids..i accept and take the children..also as my own. i have been with a person before and he has 5 kids already and me i was completely single..and he told me about it..there was no problem..the most important thing is the present and the future. and also it is important that he take me and my kid as his own and accept that too..
@Ghajini (776)
• Philippines
23 Mar 13
As a man, if ever I meet the woman for me, and if happens that she has already some children, then I need to accept her completely as long as she has changed and is willing to accept me completely as well, regardless of who I am. As it was said in the Holy Bible, 2 Corinthians 5:17 (King James Version) Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
@vexxus (712)
• Philippines
22 Mar 13
Definitely Yes, for love does not care if you are old, or with kids or what ever, if I really love the person I should accept his kids, but before we get married she should be divorced, and there are no lies and secrets between us. Honesty and Love is a very good combination.