Why Are Some People Mean and Rude?

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Last weekend’s party was very memorable, and for a bad reason. A woman, who was the ex-girlfriend of one of the guests tried to create a scene. The ex and the current girlfriend were talking to the bartender and obviously having fun. While the woman came with her mom. Through her own admissions, we learned that she and her then boyfriend are no longer together for two months. Anyway, to cut the story short, we found out that she is still in love with the ex-boyfriend, despite the fact that it’s been 5 years since they broke up and they both have moved on; or so we thought. She tried to embarrass the couple by talking to the bartender directly about how lousy a boyfriend the guy is, and even tried to pick a fight with the girlfriend by getting on her face. The bartender admitted that she was on the verge of calling the cops (and no, she is not drunk. She does not drink). I have to give it to the girl and the boyfriend. They never said any mean word back to her. The girl also did not do anything when the ex-girlfriend got into her face. She made me proud. They both did, for not stooping down low. After realizing that she is not getting any reaction from the couple, she walked out of the party and left her mother without a ride. She probably realized that she is embarrassing herself. Later that night, she called each and every one of us (except for the couple, I guess) to explain what happened. And it was of course a different version. Since it has nothing to do with me, I just said the necessary non-committal responses and never offered anything (taking cue from that couple). I guess we all learned a lesson that day. That there will always be people who will not be happy for us, who will try to drag you down with their negativity, and make you feel bad because they are not doing good themselves. And there is nothing that we can do or say that will make them change. Rather than wasting time getting down and dirty with these people, let’s just walk away and let them realize their own mistakes. After all, the only person who can help them is their own selves.