Never Say This to the Frankenstein Monster

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The Frankenstein Monster lives. He is knocking on your door. You open up your door and start to scream. After a minute or two, you compose yourself. The Monster hasn't moved. Whatever you do, never say this to the Frankenstein Monster: (1) Hey fella, it looks like you could use a stiff drink. (2) I meant to bolt the door, not your head. (3) Would you like to try out for Ohio State? They could use an extra tackle. I said tackle, dummy. (4) You need to perk up. You look so dead. (5) It's too early for Halloween. Have a Ding Dong instead.