I'm not dressing that way

@carebear29 (31946)
Wausau, Wisconsin
June 15, 2016 9:19pm CST
So my husband wants me to wear tighter clothes and dress more like a hoe as I will put it. I wear what is comfy to my level. I don't like dressing like a hoe and I refuse to. I have been telling him this for years. I'm really getting annoyed at him for it and this is one of the reasons why I hate him. I love him to death but every time I don't wear something tight, he tells me he won't look at me. It hurts me and he seems not to care. Anyone else have a spouse like this?
10 people like this
18 responses
@swirlz (3136)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
Well, what do you usually wear? Tighter clothes doesn't necessarily mean skin-tight clothes. Maybe he just means fitted clothes, more fitted to the body, but not exactly taut on the skin.
4 people like this
@swirlz (3136)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
@carebear29 Oh. Well that would definitely be a problem. But he married you despite of you not wearing such clothes. There must be a part of him that loves you for who you are. Maybe he's frustrated about something. I usually get annoyed at my husband when he wears crocs. I think he should only wear them to the wet market / farmers market. But he wears them everywhere, to a clinic, to the mall, visiting people, etc. It makes it look like I just dragged him out of the house, like he would rather watch basketball but I forced him to accompany me or else. :D Wearing sneakers isn't that hard. Maybe your husband has an underlying issue like this, although sneakers and skimpy outfits aren't on the same scale. You should try asking him why it really matters to him.
2 people like this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
@swirlz He doesn't get what he wants in the bedroom. Thats what he complains about the most.
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
He likes them like strippers.
• United States
16 Jun 16
If my husband ever told me what to wear, say, do, eat, etc. he'd be living someplace else real quick.
3 people like this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
I just keep telling him I won't do it and stick up for myself
• United States
16 Jun 16
@carebear29 I dated a guy for several years who told me what to wear, and he bought my clothes - I put up with it for a while, then I woke up and realized what kind of ah he was.
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
@AbbyGreenhill Yeah my husband buys me clothes but I tell him not too because he complains about not having money
1 person likes this
@tammys85 (29868)
• Baltimore, Maryland
17 Jun 16
Wow. You don't have to dress in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, and he really needs to accept you for who you are, AND show you a little respect.
2 people like this
@tammys85 (29868)
• Baltimore, Maryland
18 Jun 16
@carebear29 I know, but the whole thing about him not looking at you gets me. He needs to leave it alone and realize not everyone likes to dress that way. :-/
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
19 Jun 16
@tammys85 Right I agree
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
18 Jun 16
I like to surprise him but not if he's asking all the time
@SIMPLYD (90727)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
Maybe you can just wear them to please him , when at home only .
2 people like this
@jazel_juan (15747)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
@carebear29 Yes i know what you mean. It's a different thing when it is demanded, it gets annoying.
2 people like this
@SIMPLYD (90727)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
@carebear29 Well, in a way , it means he finds you sexy on it .
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
I want to surprise him but not when he's asking all the time.
3 people like this
@Shavkat (136497)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
Have you tried to ask him why he wants you dress up like it? I think he wants you to look pretty in his eyes. I am not saying that I am in favor of his likes. If it is irrational reason, then there is no point of wearing such outfit.
2 people like this
@Shavkat (136497)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
@carebear29 Uhmmm I guess he has its fantasy? I mean he wants you to be good in his eyes.
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
@Shavkat Yes he does
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
I dress the way that makes safe too but he insists I look like a stripper lol
1 person likes this
@DWDavis (25814)
• Pikeville, North Carolina
16 Jun 16
Your husband needs see that his insistence on such a thing is hurting you. My wife doesn't say much about how I dress except when I wear jeans. Then she teases me about how I look good in tight jeans.
3 people like this
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
some guys do, some guys don't @dwdavis sweats to jeans is an improvement @carebear29
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
I started wearing jeans more instead of sweats. Now he wants leggings.
2 people like this
@DWDavis (25814)
• Pikeville, North Carolina
16 Jun 16
@carebear29 Tell him you'll start wearing leggings when he does.
2 people like this
@jazel_juan (15747)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
Exactly what type of clothes that he wants you to wear? What types of clothes do you prefer? Fortunately, my husband doesn't demand that from me.
2 people like this
@jazel_juan (15747)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
@carebear29 eeekkk!! He should accept you for you.
2 people like this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
Like a stripper if that helps.
@toniganzon (72317)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
Fortunately nobody asks me to dress like that. I like dressing up but more like a sexy sophisticated look than a hoe.
2 people like this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
Right I agree
1 person likes this
@hereandthere (45671)
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
since he's insisting on certain outfits on you, i'm curious how he dresses.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
17 Jun 16
@carebear29 pretty unfair way of thinking
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
He dresses nice for others but not for me so I won't
1 person likes this
@yukimori (10134)
• United States
16 Jun 16
Your husband telling get you that he won't look at you because you're not dressing the way he wants you to is abusive. I'd divorce him.
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
I dress nice but not the way he likes it anyways.
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
17 Jun 16
@Genipher Sort of. He is very stubborn
@yukimori (10134)
• United States
17 Jun 16
@Genipher Maybe, but I have an incredibly low tolerance for abusive behaviors in a relationship. A man refusing to look at his wife because she won't dress the way he wants her to is controlling and abusive. I may have been letting some of the background posts color my opinion a bit, too...
So I have been married 13 years July 8th this year. We went through a 6 month separation before and he got his left arm half crippled at work. Got his arm...
@just4him (302277)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
He needs to start treating you like his wife with respect.
1 person likes this
@tammys85 (29868)
• Baltimore, Maryland
17 Jun 16
@carebear29 His boys have the right idea and you deserve respect.
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
17 Jun 16
His boys keep telling him that
1 person likes this
@just4him (302277)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
17 Jun 16
@tammys85 I heartily agree.
1 person likes this
@norcal (4890)
• Franklinton, North Carolina
16 Jun 16
Maybe the two of you could reach some kind of compromise. There must be something you could be comfortable in that he would still find attractive. In any case, he should not be mean about it.
2 people like this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
I have tried so many times. I just pretty much dress for the weather
@trivia79 (7828)
• El Segundo, California
19 Jun 16
was his attitude already like that before you marry him?
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
19 Jun 16
Nope
1 person likes this
@trivia79 (7828)
• El Segundo, California
20 Jun 16
@carebear29 maybe, he just wants to re-freshened the younger years of both of you and that's why he is asking you to wear like that. because sometimes, as we get older, our fashion in clothing also changes.
1 person likes this
@rina110383 (24497)
16 Jun 16
My ex-boyfriend who is a perennial cheater used to tell me to wear those kinds of clothes. One of the reasons why I got rid of him years ago.
2 people like this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
I am starting to think he's like your ex
2 people like this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
18 Jun 16
@yukimori right very true
@yukimori (10134)
• United States
17 Jun 16
@carebear29 Considering how much he's apparently accused you of cheating, it honestly wouldn't surprise me.
2 people like this
@Hatley (163781)
• Garden Grove, California
16 Jun 16
no my hubby was very loving and did not tell m,e how to dress he c ame freom a very relligious famil;y so he never would have liked me in tight clothes either wish you could get thru to your hubby as I know you love him darn.
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
Right. His ex's dressed like strippers and I don't like that
@Vjvals (906)
• Roseville, California
17 Jun 16
Yeah, best to wear what you're comfortable with
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
18 Jun 16
I always do
• Philippines
16 Jun 16
what an idiot, sorry for saying this to him. But he should love you regardless of what you wear. I mean, what's wrong with him, isn't that enough he gets to spent time with you all day?
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
Right.
@Tampa_girl7 (48786)
• United States
16 Jun 16
So sorry that you have to put up with this kind of behavior.
1 person likes this
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
I am used to it honestly.
@carebear29 (31946)
• Wausau, Wisconsin
16 Jun 16
@LoriAMoore Been married 13 years on July 8th