Death of a EX

March 31, 2017 2:11pm CST
I guess I'm asking if anyone else has been thru this. My ex-husband of 30 years passed away. I had to step in and take care of things because it seemed like no one else knew what to do or else they were just hanging back waiting to see if I was going to do anything Did I do the right thing? I had a small insurance policy on him that I had paid off years ago so I paid for him to be creamated. it was not enough for any kind of service or a even a simple funeral Just asking if anyone can tell me how I should have handled this Open to any comments
8 people like this
10 responses
@MALUSE (69413)
• Germany
31 Mar 17
I don't think that it makes sense to discuss how you *should have* handled the case. You handled it. That is the important thing. I have no experience in such matters but I think you did the right thing.
1 person likes this
• Defuniak Springs, Florida
31 Mar 17
Did you still have any sort of relationship with him after the divorce? Kids together or anything?
31 Mar 17
Yes we had 3 children one of which passed away 11 years ago He had 2 sisters and A brother plus a son from another relationship We really didn't have much contact after our divorce but I guess I did it for my 2 sons I was always the go to person that took care of things so I guess I felt like I still needed to take care of things plus I was the only one with any money
@jaboUK (64361)
• United Kingdom
31 Mar 17
I don't think any of us here can possibly advise you on so personal a thing, especially without knowing all the circumstances. It sounds as if you did the right thing though, especially as you were married for 30 years.
• Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
3 Apr 17
I think you did great, you had the policy and you used it for the intended purpose. As for the rest of his relatives
@paigea (35678)
• Canada
1 Apr 17
You did the right thing by handling it. I am sure you did it for your children. As far as a service; a memorial can be anything. We went to a picnic for a friend's memorial. Pot luck salads and side dishes. Weiners and burgers to BBQ. They brought their slide show of their father to the picnic area and showed it in the camp kitchen. They spoke about their father. And others did too. They had little cards printed and glued onto little bags of wild bird seed and onto little bags of dog treats. Everyone was to take one and share with animals. They honoured him by celebrating in the park they had enjoyed as a family. And the animal treats were because he was an animal lover. The whole thing cost very little and was a great tribute to our friend. Could have even cost less without the cards and bird seed. Any way a service/memorial does not have to cost much if it was something your children wanted
• United States
31 Mar 17
I think you did a fine job. It had to be done and you stepped up to do it when no one else would. Sorry for your lost.
• United States
31 Mar 17
sounds like you did what you thought was best,nothing wrong here.
@Courtlynn (66921)
• United States
31 Mar 17
After 30 years, I would want to be involved. But do they have kids or a newer partner who should've been the ones to actually do something.
@Happy2BeMe (99399)
• Canada
31 Mar 17
I think you handled it well and did the right thing. Sorry for you loss even if he was your ex. 30 years is a long time to spend with somebody.
• United States
31 Mar 17
There really isn't a right way to handle a situation like this that fits every person and scenario perfectly. If there are complaints from other family members, tell them that they were free to contribute at any time during the process. That they didn't, and allowed you to handle it, shows that they must have been okay with it at the time.