Water Water Everywhere Top Ten: Jesus Walking on the Water (#8)

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It's time for another one of those "water" songs. After all the water we had falling from the sky yesterday it doesn't seem that I need to discuss water at all, but I started this series and I'll keep swimming in it. Here's the next song on my list of favorites that have the word "water" in the title. #8: Jesus Walking on the Water - Violent Femmes How on this earth do you describe this band to someone who's never heard them? Hardly "punk" despite the name, no women in the band, and a lead vocalist, who sounds like he's whimpering, writing songs that deal with killing children, trying to get laid....and being a devout Christian. Well, that's more or less the Violent Femmes. The Milwaukee trio was discovered by Chrissie Hynde: she saw them playing on the sidewalk in a park and was so impressed by them that she asked them to open the Pretenders' Milwaukee show that evening. The Femmes also have the distinction of being the only band to ever have an album certified "platinum" (a million copies sold) that never made the Billboard top 200 chart. That would be their 1982 debut album, which, in my opinion, is the greatest album about teenage angst ever made. I'm going to tell you up front, if you've never heard the Femmes, that they are DEFINITELY an acquired taste. Gordon Gano (the lead singer in question) has a rather, ahem, "unique" voice. And, as I said, you're going to hear how he likes African-American women ("I was so pleased to learn that they're much faster"), a slap at gay men, and a profession of faith ("you know I love the Lord of hosts, the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost")....in the same song ("Black Girls")!!!! What the heck?! Here you have a straight-up song of faith (no, he's not being snide or sarcastic: the first time I saw Gano was with his "side project," the Mercy Seat, which was a gospel soul group fronted by his girlfriend at the time [opening for Jerry Harrison]), where Gano professes his loyalty ("yes, sir, yes, sir, yes, sir, I'll come when you call") because of the transformation in his life ("sinking sand, he took my hand, he raised me up, then he brought me up"). Maybe the strangest gospel song you'll ever hear, but I love it. Jesus Walking on the Water Written by Gordon Gano Recorded by the Violent Femmes From Hallowed Ground, 1984 Tell me is it true: