Apologies - Appropriate, Superfluous Or Plain Silly

Tweet

1. The appropriate apology If you insult someone with words or deeds, unwillingly or willingly, a heartfelt apology is appropriate. It's the most difficult one. Some people are better at it, others just can't jump over the hurdle and put their thoughts into words. If they aren't completely insensible oafs, they may show through their behaviour that they feel they are in the wrong. 2. The superfluous apology This is the kind Continental Europeans notice so often in the United Kingdom and Ireland that they think citizens of these countries have an apology gene. You step on someone's foot and apologise. Ok, that's the thing to do in this situation. But why does the foot stepper and also the foot steppee apologise? Is it because A's foot stepping wouldn't have taken place if B hadn't put their foot there? I've come across some excessive apologisers. An Irish online friend apologises in every other sentence. Why? What for? I don't know, I can't see reasons for all her apologies. Once she got so on my nerves that I threatened her to end our virtual relationship if she didn't stop apologising. I finished, "Don't you dare apologise for apologising so much!" She confessed that she was about to do just that. It may be a manner of speaking just like inserting 'well', 'like', 'innit?' or other expletives into one's speech. It may be the case that English speaking countrypeople don't react any more because of the many 'Sorrys' that bombard their ears all day long. People whose native language isn't English, however, hear what is said and get fed up with it. Stop it, please, and use apologies only where they make sense. 3. Plain silly apologies The other day I read a post starting with an apology. It's the reason why I'm putting pen to paper/finger to keyboard. It really annoyed me. The woman needs advice for a computer problem and began her post apologising that she is computer illiterate. WHAT? Since when is this a reason to apologise? Is being computer literate the measurement now for the merit, worth and value of a human being? I may know next to nothing about computers, but I know other things a computer specialist may not know. The German Phillip Melanchton (1497-1560) went to university at the age of 12, got his degree as a bachelor at the age of 14 and became a professor at the age of 21. He knew everything one could know in his days about his subjects, namely Ancient Greek, Latin and Theology. Those were the days. In the 21st century NOBODY knows everything. It's not even possible to know everything in one field of science. Nobel Prizes are given to scientists who're experts in niche subjects maybe ten more people on the planet understand. Should physicists apologise that they know nothing about, say, medicine or geology? I know very little about computering. I'm not proud about this. It's a fact I live with and certainly no reason to apologise. Do you also suffer from excessive apologising?