She's Been Dead 24 Years Now

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October 1st is always a somewhat sad day for me. It is the anniversary of my cousin Cheri's death. She died in a car accident when she was only 14 years old. I was 9 at the time. She has been dead far longer than she was alive. Sometimes I wonder why her death affected me so much, that I still mourn her all these years later, even when my memory of her as an actual person is beginning to fail. I guess it's because she was the first young person I knew, my first friend, who died. I loved her. And it didn't seem fair, and it still doesn't all these years later. Cheri inspired me to write my first novel, which is loosely based on her short and tragic life. She didn't have a happy childhood either. But I always remember her smiling and seeming happy. I didn't find out about all the horrors she lived through until after she died. Every year on this day I remember her. This year she is joined on the other side with our cousin Liz, who died of an aneurysm at the age of 41 this past July. Cheri lived with Liz and her family for a while when we were kids, and they were more like sisters than cousins. I find it a weird coincidence that Cheri died at 14 and Liz at 41. I hope that they are together now. And I hope that I will see them again someday.