In a break up, this is one of the hardest things to accept....He would rather be alone than be with you.
By Jesuslovesme
@MsBooklover (3974)
United States
April 20, 2018 5:36pm CST
When you spend over two years in a relationship working hard to be a good girlfriend..being attentive...helpful...and not complaining about things you easily could complain about....and he breaks up with you. He is telling you that he would rather be alone than be with you. That is difficult. Did it really take him over two years to figure that one out? I was watching one of those videos that uses words to communicate what really keeps a man interested. You know what I mean....one of those long drawn out videos that you cannot wait until you get to the end of...and it ends up that the man it belongs to indicates that what it takes is to make a man feel wanted....like you need him. Oh please.....I am not buying that especially when he wants to get out of responsibility and give you plenty of it.
6 people like this
7 responses
@marguicha (230365)
• Chile
20 Apr 18
I got caught in the words "working hard to be a good girlfriend". Love and being together has little to do with working hard in my opinion. I accepted my husband as he was and he accepted me as I was. I have heard many times that people who break up are those couples that try to be someone else in order to me the other person´s requirements. A man is interested if the woman shows how she really is and she is the kind of person he wants. Same happens for the other part.
3 people like this
@MsBooklover (3974)
• United States
21 Apr 18
I was always myself, but he had a lot of responsibility that I helped him with.
1 person likes this
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
21 Apr 18
I have trouble finding anyone who likes me as I am. They always want to change me in some way. Especially about my writing... "Why don't you write this instead of what you are writing?" Usually because they're embarrassed about the genre. Anyways, it's getting to the point where I might not find anyone.
4 people like this
@marguicha (230365)
• Chile
21 Apr 18
@MsBooklover Maybe he didn´t want to be helped so much. Some men are like that.
1 person likes this
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
21 Apr 18
My girlfriends give me a few months at the most. Then they ditch me. lol
Out of all my relationships, I have never dumped anyone.
2 people like this
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
23 Apr 18
@MsBooklover It could be any reason, but the most likely is we're just not compatible. I have never been truly broken up over someone that leaves. None have felt like 'the one'.
I think they can sense that, despite my efforts to make it work.
1 person likes this
@MsBooklover (3974)
• United States
22 Apr 18
This relationship lasted two years, three months and one week. Why do they ditch you?
1 person likes this
@dragon54u (31633)
• United States
21 Apr 18
I know there are good men out there but I haven't met any yet. He was using you for 2 years, what a jerk. Take a break from "romance" and figure out why you are attracted to such dirtbags. Once you know why you were attracted to a person like that you can work on avoiding them and building your self esteem.
Personally, I've given up on men. By the time I discovered that I was attracted to scumbag jerks, I was in my 50s. I'm very happy by myself but I give this advice to women in bad relationships--bad men gravitate towards women who will put up with them if they give the woman that bare minimum they have to. It's up to you to not repeat your mistake. I know how much it hurts but remember that you've been taken advantage of. Now find your weakness and build on it and never be in this situation again. I hope you find someone who deserves you!
2 people like this
@MsBooklover (3974)
• United States
22 Apr 18
Thank you. This is excellent advice. What I have found is that some put on an act until you fall in love with them. Then the real man comes out, and you are already in love...and you are trying to figure out who he really is or are these just his faults.
1 person likes this
@caopaopao (12395)
• China
21 Apr 18
Just be yourself. You just met a person who is not right for you. He broke up with you not because you are not doing well, but because he doesn't want to be responsible for you at all.
2 people like this
@caopaopao (12395)
• China
21 Apr 18
@MsBooklover You will meet the right one some day.
1 person likes this
@just4him (323168)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
23 Apr 18
@MsBooklover I'm glad you are.
1 person likes this
@Starmaiden (9308)
• Canada
21 Apr 18
I'm in my 14th year of celibacy. It was the best decision I've ever made! 
2 people like this
@MsBooklover (3974)
• United States
21 Apr 18
I agree.....I think that might have been part of the problem.
1 person likes this
@Shavkat (141905)
• Philippines
22 Apr 18
@MsBooklover We have the same situation. I had this ex of mine and we were in a relationship for more than 2 years. The reason, she claimed to be out of love. How come? I didn't see anything that went wrong. The reason, she had found another love. It is quite unfair. But then, I took it positively. It is better to know as early as possible than being committed to a person who cannot be loyal to their partner.
1 person likes this
@MsBooklover (3974)
• United States
22 Apr 18
@Shavkat I was reading your first two sentences. I knew you were going to say she found someone else. You ask yourself this. If you were focusing on me, how would you find someone else? What on earth were you doing while you were in a relationship with me to the extent that you got to know someone so well, you knew you wanted to leave me for that person?
1 person likes this
@MsBooklover (3974)
• United States
21 Apr 18
I guess not being beautiful is concrete enough for him, but my looks are the same as when we met. He should have not chosen to have a relationship with me if I was not stunning enough. Why waste over two years of my life?
1 person likes this
