Felt so guilty unintentionally asking an inappropriate question

@cyclopz (251)
Sydney, Australia
August 16, 2019 2:00am CST
As i saw my colleague back to work after being away for quite some time from her maternity leave, I asked her how her is baby doing without even knowing that the baby didn't make it. She replied to me in a soft voice: "Oh, you didn't know? The baby didn't make it". I felt so guilty and I could see her sad expression from her eyes which is almost tearing. I apologized and I was really not quite sure what to say next because I won't be able to take back what I said. I don't think it's right saying "it's ok" to her because i don't i think it is something that people could easily move one from. I wish i would have just kept quiet about it but then it would also seem like i didn't care at all if i didn't ask about it. Have you also been on a similar situation? What would you have done if you were in my place?
5 people like this
7 responses
@sprite1950 (30453)
• Corsham, England
16 Aug 19
It is unfortunate but you weren't to know and I don't expect you will be the only one to ask the same thing. Hopefully she will go on to have other children. It hasn't happened to me but I think I would have gently apologised and said you didn't know. I'm sure she understood.
1 person likes this
@Starkinds (32703)
• India
16 Aug 19
I can understand her or your situation but after few days say sorry to her is much better.
@hereandthere (45651)
• Philippines
16 Aug 19
you wouldn't ask if you knew, would you? so the most you can say is "i'm so sorry. i didn't know." maybe only those in her inner circle knew, or the management. her reaction shows she's surprised, too, so i don't think she can take that against you.
• Guangdong, China
16 Aug 19
well, sometimes you could notice something different from their faces. I think someone will appear much more happy if he or she has fortunate things happen. If they seem like a sad or depressed face, then maybe the unfortunate things happened to them already. Then at this time, we better do as we are normal do. No questions may be the best politeness. However, things did happen, it's not blame on you.
@Sojourn (13836)
• India
16 Aug 19
I think she have forgiven you, judging by her reaction. I think I had been part of such an embarrassing situation before.
@Janet357 (75656)
16 Aug 19
hmmm it cannot be avoided. yes i also experience this.
@yanzalong (18984)
• Indonesia
16 Aug 19
It never happens to me. I would've asked for apology telling her you didn't know it.