Appropriately Rewarding Kids Prepares Them For An Adult Life Of Working For PAY!
@danishcanadian (28954)
Canada
September 4, 2019 10:01pm CST
In a previous post I mentioned that I care for a friend's 7 year old son while she is at work. The child had some special needs, but he's a great kid, and under our guidance and that of his fantastic mother, he's growing and maturing well.
In order to correct a few issues with his behaviour, my friend, my husband and I came up with the idea of a reward chart. If he stayed calm, was polite, and followed our fair instructions, he'd get a check under all three categories, a sticker on his chart, and some oreo cookies to eat on the way home. Our "instructions" are gently asking him to calm down when he gets too loud, etc, and being polite goes without saying. The issues are all pretty much intertwined, but the way we have the chart set up makes him aware that we are aware of all aspects.
This chart is working REMARKABLY WELL for him. I even found a Peppa Pig chart (he loves her), and mounted it on a blue clipboard, blue being his favourite colour.
We are all in agreement, and even the little guy loves it. Anyway, the whole thing reminded me of a conversation I had with an older man about how back in his day kids didn't get rewards, they were made to obey. Ahh, results through fear. I remember those days, and my friend remembers those days, and we vowed NEVER AGAIN! We would break the cycle!!!! My husband is of an older generation. He's an early boomer, and I'm an early millenial, so there are 36 years between us. Neither of us really fits in with our generation, and we get along great!!! The amazing thing is that my old hippie husband and I are on the same page when it comes to kids. We don't want any, but if we are in charge of caring for one, we know what we believe.
I told him what the person had said to me about rewarding children, and that I had reminded the person that I bet he would not have gone to work that day had he not gotten PAID! By appropriately rewarding children, we are teaching them to understand what it means to get paid as an adult. By getting to choose his reward at the end of the day (I keep a selection of treats around) he is understanding that his hard work is going to pay off. My husband and the boy's mother agree.
What do you think? Does rewarding kids spoil them, or teach them how life works?
2 people like this
1 response
@psanasangma (7910)
• India
6 Sep 19
Rewarding kid by money may spoil them. Again it depends on parents... I think rewarding to the children should be something they can use and create something
@danishcanadian (28954)
• Canada
7 Sep 19
Rewards should be diverse. Giving them money for something is not a bad idea. It teaches them how to manage money. They are allowed to buy what they want, and learn how to handle money responsibly. They may even decide to save some for later. My step-son gathered change from pool bottoms, couch cushions, and under the upside-down rides at amusement parks, and when he was 5 years old he opened a SAVINGS account with $100 in it!
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