Encouraging and discouraging. / myLot

Philippines

April 24, 2021 5:08pm CST

I am the desk officer for women and children protection in our community, it is a big responsibility and I have learned a lot. Well, every "case" i have learned a lot. Not just from them but with myself too. Encouraging. When a woman come to me and wanted to discuss her case against her husband or partner, I let her speak her problem and I listen and after that, I will ask her, "do you want to file a case?" I just hate it when a fellow woman being beaten by their husband or partner or their children. DOMESTIC VIOLENCE. I always encourage them to file a case against their husband or partner, with all the proof she had, medical certificate and photos of the black and blues. But... After our first community hearing, or even filing a police blotter, no more follow up is happening, why? They will say to me that her husband or partner promised not to do it again.

It is discouraging but there's nothing I can do, because at the end of the day, she will get to decide what she thinks is the best foe her and her family. And it is discouraging too on my part as a single

. I know not all men are the same and men have already find me intimidating.

Oh well...

13 people like this

11 responses

Prabhat Singh

@Prabhatsingh (3537)

• India

24 Apr 21

Let me first thank you for what you are doing in terms of children and women protection community. Also, no promises or being sorry justifies the violence which they have to endure everyday. And what's stopping the husband or partner from not doing it again ? But again Thank You for the service you provide to the society. "Small ripples make big waves"

1 person likes this

Reine25

@Lucky15 (37346)

• Philippines

25 Apr 21

i don't know what to do with them, as much as i wanted them to be out, they don't want to

2 people like this

Prabhat Singh

@Prabhatsingh (3537)

• India

25 Apr 21

@Lucky15 It happens. Falling back to old habits is much more easier than trying something new.

2 people like this

Reine25

@Lucky15 (37346)

• Philippines

25 Apr 21

@Prabhatsingh i agree :(

1 person likes this

Thelma

@thelme55 (76476)

• Germany

25 Apr 21

That is a good thing you are doing in your community. Well done. I just wish that more women have the courage to „fight“ against their abuser.I know that it is easy said than done as a person who has not experienced an abuse.

1 person likes this

Reine25

@Lucky15 (37346)

• Philippines

25 Apr 21

that is what i have said yesterday, i don't know what to say, but told the woman who claimed to be abused, "at the end of the day, you decide what is best for you and your children"

1 person likes this

Thelma

@thelme55 (76476)

• Germany

26 Apr 21

@Lucky15 Yes, the victims should decide for themselves. We can only advice.

1 person likes this

Go Crossbones

@crossbones27 (48417)

• Mojave, California

25 Apr 21

There is truth to what you wrote with men find you intimidating. Believe it or not my step father was like that. Its all about power and if a women got to much power he felt threatened. Would smack around my mom more.

1 person likes this

Reine25

@Lucky15 (37346)

• Philippines

25 Apr 21

oh, sorry about that.

I think the intimidation from men have somethig to do with having sibs who are policemen and they thought i am know things. but i am friendly

Darcy Nemo

@YrNemo (20261)

•

25 Apr 21

wow, I admire your work. Let hope those husbands will keep their word.

1 person likes this

Reine25

@Lucky15 (37346)

• Philippines

25 Apr 21

we have them signed up, which we can have a basis that if it happens again, definitely file a case

1 person likes this

CarolDM

@CarolDM (203454)

• Nashville, Tennessee

24 Apr 21

You have an important job.

1 person likes this

Reine25

@Lucky15 (37346)

• Philippines

25 Apr 21

it was harder that I thought, carol. I have to seek help to my sibs, who are policemen :))

1 person likes this

CarolDM

@CarolDM (203454)

• Nashville, Tennessee

25 Apr 21

@Lucky15 It pays to have friends.

1 person likes this

Princess Liza

@Princessliza (247)

•

25 Apr 21

Nice! You are doing great work!

1 person likes this

Reine25

@Lucky15 (37346)

• Philippines

25 Apr 21

thank you!

1 person likes this

Princess Liza

@Princessliza (247)

•

26 Apr 21

@Lucky15 welcome!!

1 person likes this

snowy

@snowy22315 (169940)

• United States

25 Apr 21

It is hard when you see the same patterns repeated over and over

1 person likes this

Reine25

@Lucky15 (37346)

• Philippines

25 Apr 21

and dealing with the victim is like, it is hard to convince them :(

Notlilie

@prinzcy (32322)

• Malaysia

30 Apr 21

Unless she's willing to make her mind and leave, her situation will never change. Not to do it again? Not to be pessimist, but I hardly doubt that. It's like a cheater saying he/she will be loyal for life.