Some childhood memories of my father
June 20, 2021 11:11pm CST
It's father's day in the US (well barely for me I have about 9 more minutes left of it as I write this) and it had me reflecting on my own father. Growing up my dad was amazing. He always spent time with us doing something. He had the patience of a saint with us a lot of the time. He always took the time to answer our many questions and just be present. My dad has said and done things that have made me mad in the past as with any parent. My dad often lacks a filter and will say some things that are not always appropriate but overall he has been a great dad. My dad once told me that his job as a father was to always be there for us and he has always done just that. When I have really needed him he is there. Some of my best memories are when my dad would load my brother and me up in the car and take us to the lake or to various trails. We were always doing something. We went camping in the summer and we would sometimes just take drives and my dad would make sure to hit some bumps so we would go flying up out of our seats (back before carseats and seatbelts were a huge deal). My dad didn't always watch us the best so we did do a lot of things we probably shouldn't have but I tell you what when he did get after us we knew why and we deserved it every single time and we were cautious to make the same mistake again. My dad always told us he loved us. When he was a kid his parents never told him they loved him and he wanted to make sure we knew we were loved. He didn't spend a lot of money on us but he was always doing something with us whether it was a random project like building a picnic table, taking walks to go mushroom and berry hunting, or he was loading us up to go for a drive. He gave us something so much more valuable than a new toy. He gave us his time. He taught us things like how to hold a hammer, how to tell which berries are edible, how to cook. My dad was a stay at home dad so he was always with us. I remember when I was sick or hurt I automatically went to my dad and he'd just hold me and tell me everything was going to be alright. When I had an earache I remember him rocking me and holding his hand over my ear and blowing warm into it. I remember when I had a bee sting he'd put baking soda on it. I remember him holding me down to clip my toenails something I was NOT fond of. I remember the way he'd make me breakfast and lunch when I was at home. These are things I'll forever remember no matter how mad I may get at him I can never forget the things he has done for me. When I was little he was my hero. If I needed him he was always there. My dad is equally good with our kids but once again doesn't watch them the best so I won't leave my son with him if there are other kids because he thinks they'll watch each other but otherwise he is amazing with them. My son loves papa because he always gets things I don't give him. My son and my nieces are lucky to have him. My dad isn't perfect and has made a lot of mistakes but I can never say he was horrible to us. My brother and I are lucky to have a dad that was good with us in comparison to most of my siblings fathers who either weren't present or was a raging alcoholic. My dad wasn't a good husband but he was an amazing father and my mom always credits him with that.
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That is really very vivid memory of your father. I think in my case we were not that close to each other when I was young I was much closer to my mom than with my dad. I do not know but I somehow think he also love me as well but I think we were not that close because I also was not the good son that he expected. Growing up I was said to become a stubborn young child that my father used to punish me that is why I somehow separated myself from him in my younger years since I resented those corporal punishments I receive from him to discipline me. But now that I am matured enough I think we both are okay already. We talk like adults and let that past forgotten already. We rarely talk about the past except during those candid moments where he would tell stories about my being a stubborn child.
• United States
I think it's great you get along with him better now. I was very close to my father as a kid. I've always been pretty easygoing so my parents never had any issues with me. My dad and brother were more likely to butt heads when my brother was younger but they both get along really well now. My son is closer to me than he is his father because my husband is more firm and short tempered but my son still loves him and gets along with him but he's much closer to me. I think boys are usually more likely to be closer to their mothers and daughters to their fathers albeit that's not always the case but I feel like it is more than not.
@sissy15 Me and my father dont have any issues about the past. I just think that was just a phase-in me and as we grow up we just accept the past as past. My son was close to me when he was young. But as he grows up he becomes closer to his mom now. I have no qualms about that I guess its a phase too changing preference as time goes by.
• United States
@rsa101 As kids get older their relationships with their parents will change. That's normal. I foresee my son always being closer to me than his dad just because of the bond we have. My husband loves him but they aren't super close. My son likes spending time with my husband but he knows that I'm his safe space and the one who has been and will always be there. I'm more calm and easygoing than my husband and I'm way more likely to goof around with him. My husband is more serious. I think as a whole though kids go through things and their preference for parents changes. I am closer to my mom than my dad now but growing up I was a complete daddy's girl. My dad could do no wrong in my eyes.