I Was Angry On Friday.

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I’m just sharing some feelings I experienced on Friday. I don’t want to go into details and cause myself to feel angry again, but to make a long story short, my Mom’s death could’ve (and should’ve) been prevented. I’m not too happy with the other hospitals she visited over the summer because I don’t feel they ran enough tests to find the problem. However, I don’t fault the one she passed away at because they had pinpointed the problem, it was just too late and sepsis took over (and lead to heart failure). :( I was irritated when I was first told about the sepsis, but I wasn’t sure how else I felt because I think it was a shock but also not a shock. It doesn’t make sense but that’s how I felt. Something hit me on Friday and I was heartbroken all over again, as well as angry over the whole thing. I cried, wanted to punch something, said “it’s not fair” multiple times to friends and just wanted to curl up and sleep. I wound up going out for a bit, but it didn’t really help my mood. I miss(ed) my Mom and I was angry about it. It wasn’t until later that night when I was settling down to watch TV and relax that my anger started to fade. I’m sure my anger will return at some point. That’s how it is with grief, especially when you find out it didn’t have to be this way (and knowing it wasn’t supposed to be this way). I’m looking into therapy for my grief and anger, but I couldn’t call today because of the holiday, so hooray for that. I’ve been okay since Saturday though, but I’m still planning to call this week. Anyway, I’m not looking for advice or for anyone to tell me how I should or shouldn’t feel (and I don’t mean that to be rude, of course). I just wanted to share my feelings. I absolutely appreciate the support you have all given me over the last few weeks (and the last few months as my family and I acted as caregivers for my Mom). Thank you so much. Welp, back to work I go. I wound up skipping WWE Raw because I didn’t feel like moving my laptop into the living room. But anyway, I’ll catch you all later. Photo Credit: Pixabay.