To respond and not react?

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Whenever we are furious at someone or something, we lash out. Can we control our emotions? Most of us cannot. Spirituality teaches us to respond and not react. If we control our emotions and don't mouth the first thing we feel, life would be less complex. We all have instincts, however, not all instincts are to be worked upon. We have to be parsimonious with the number of words we speak. When you feel angry, what do you do? Do you react? Do you throw or break things to avoid verbal battle?