I am not a social person but am grateful for those of you who have a comforting presence

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When I had to go to work Friday and I had to go to a work meeting with the entire staff I had to find a table to sit at with someone I knew. I am not one to just go and sit with friends because I am a closed-off person and while I talk to different people at work from time to time I don't really have what I'd call friends. I have people I like but no one I really seek out. I am socially awkward so I tend to avoid most situations that make me really befriend anyone. I am terrible at talking to people and usually choose to sit by myself when possible like when we had our assembly earlier in the day I found a spot and just sat by myself and that's the way I usually prefer it. I can be social when need be but it's not something I am looking for. That said I envy those who are social and can just make anyone feel welcome. Our building sub is that way. You can't help but like her. She oozes kindness and warmth and she is just easy to like. My aunt (my mom's sister) has always been that way too, and so is my son's favorite teacher from when he was in fourth grade. Some people are just like that. I am not but those people like me who are eternal introverts and don't like social situations are so grateful for you. You will never know how much we rely on people like you to take the awkwardness out of a situation and make us feel at least a little more welcome. I avoid situations like the one I am talking about like the plague. I never willingly go to functions that require me to be social. I have done things for my husband and son but I never go to anything for myself. I refuse to go to work gatherings. I am pretty closed off most of the time and when I do talk it's usually at random and my stories are usually more interesting. I figure if I have to share about myself it may as well be something that's actually interesting. I don't think anyone I have worked with ever really got to know me. They know some random things about me but I don't think they've ever been able to figure me out because I'm not one who enjoys sharing things. At the last work meeting the building sub forced me to share about myself even though I really didn't want to. Work had originally sent out a questionnaire about family and asked some things about ourselves and I purposely didn't fill it out hoping I could just pass but the sub went through and read and made me answer so I did. I felt kind of on the spot so I sputtered a bit and they could tell I was uncomfortable but they tried their best to put me at ease. I sat with the building sub, the school nurse, and some people from the learning center. People who all worked in the building but were kind of on the sidelines a lot of the time so I felt I could relate them better than some of the teachers. Some of the paras sat together and a few sat with some teachers they have worked with. I guess I just didn't feel like I belonged with anyone in particular and I saw the building sub and she immediately made me feel like I somehow belonged. It's not that I feel people don't like me it's more that I feel like I am never anywhere long enough to really get comfortable with people. I see the nurse and the building sub all the time so I have gotten to know them a little. I learned so much about the building sub during that little conversation we all had to have and I never would have guessed any of the things about her like she used to be a seamstress and she taught at the university at one point. She said she just kind of fell into the job at the school. She really is an interesting person. She also has a way of just making you feel welcome. She also really loves my son and refers to him as her buddy. She is always so happy to see him. Anyway, my point is the world needs all of the people who are like her. Those of us who hate talking and being in social situations need those of you who are social and good at making people feel welcome. I pretend to be outgoing at times but it takes every ounce of energy I have and I've gotten to where when I can be alone I treasure it. I wish I could explain to people that those days where I seem off or weird and not talkative or where I just leave without saying bye it's not because I'm angry but because I'm tired and I just can't socialize anymore. My brain can only handle so much and sometimes after a long day I just need to leave and be somewhere else. I think people think I'm offended or something but I'm not. I keep it together for work but when my buddy leaves sometimes I'm just ready to check out. I love what I do and I love the people but I'm not close to the people. I only allow myself to get so close to anyone. The only person who really knows me is my husband and he only knows so much too. Everyone gets a different part of me. I don't hand out information freely. I like my quiet and I protect my peace. I avoid sitting by people when possible but when I am forced to I'm so grateful for people like the building sub.