Trying to make sure my son doesn't feel the way I did growing up

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If there's one thing I always try to do with my son it's respect his feelings which can be difficult at times. My son was diagnosed with sensory processing disorder in second grade. He used to overreact to some situations and I remember trying to tell him it's ok to be upset or disappointed but that not everything that doesn't go his way requires meltdowns and tears. I really struggled with trying not to dismiss things that seemed small to me but huge to him but boy did I try. I tried because as a kid I was also very emotional about sometimes small things. I'm realizing now that there are a lot of similarities between myself as a child and my son. I wasn't as extreme as my son was but I definitely struggled with emotions and things as a child. I remember being made fun of and called crybaby by adults. They'd laugh at my reactions or poke fun at it and it stays with me. It caused me to struggle with emotions as an adult. I went from over emotional to almost never showing emotion as an adult. I feel too vulnerable as an adult when I show any sort of emotion because of how I was made to feel as a child. My dad was a decent dad but there are some things he did or said that often made me feel bad. His favorite story is that the second I was born he heard me crying and he jokes that I didn't stop crying until I was like ten. It always made me feel bad like I was annoying. There are some things that people say that stay with you, especially when those people are your adult family members. I understand that I probably cried more than I should have over small things but I wasn't doing it to be annoying I didn't have full control over my emotions yet. As an adult, I struggle showing any emotion because I was made to feel that showing emotions was bad and now I just feel way too vulnerable when I do show them. I went from a kid who was very loving and who hugged my parents friends to hating to hug or show emotion to anyone. By adults mocking and laughing at me I learned that I was annoying and to show emotions was annoying. In my late 30s I obviously realize that those adults shouldn't have done those things but it's hard to suddenly change something that is now so ingrained in me. I have always made sure that I discuss things with my son and while I sometimes felt his emotions were over the top I never made fun of him or called him a crybaby. I didn't mock him. I would tell him I understood he had big feelings but that sometimes disappointment happens and that crying and having full meltdowns over something not going his way wasn't going to fix it and maybe we should reflect and work on our disappointment. I also told him it's ok to cry when something bad happens or we are scared. I would never treat him the way I was treated when I was a child and I cried. I wouldn't laugh and tell everyone that he cried his entire childhood. I don't think the adults in my life were necessarily trying to hurt me but they didn't think through their actions. Those same people could be nice to me and do things for me but the way they treated me when I cried often made me feel worse. It didn't fix anything. It didn't make me not cry. It just made me feel like I was a burden and I was annoying a feeling that I sometimes still feel where my family is concerned. It's why I don't talk to most of them. I learned a long time ago that if you stop reaching out to them and you don't ever hear anything from them then you probably didn't matter that much to begin with and I'm at a point where I'm stepping back from people. I am nearing 40 and I don't have the time to keep people in my life who don't want to be in it. It's my job as a parent to raise a son who can feel emotionally stable and know it's ok to cry and it's ok to be who he is and to never feel like he's a burden. I never want him to wonder if he's loved or if he's a disappointment. I keep people in his life who want to be there. He should never be the one that has to reach out when he isn't even an adult yet. If they reach out then yes he should also reach out but it should be a joint effort and not one sided. He has only spoken to my husband's family maybe twice in the past five years and he's only seen them once in the past six years. I will never make him reach out to them. They are all about my husband's sister's kids. I know they love my son but he isn't a priority, and that's fine. My son has had so many school events and the only ones he has there are me and my husband and I figure that's enough. I know he doesn't have a whole cheering section but I figure as long as he has us that's enough. My mom has gone to a few but she's older as is my dad. They struggle going to things so I don't expect them to. My husband's parents live four hours away and I take that into consideration up until I see them traveling further for distant family and that's when it kind of hits. I have always known how amazing my son is. I figure it isn't his loss for not having people in his life, it's theirs for not having him in their life. I have always tried to make him feel wanted and loved and I am sure he still struggles with that at times because while I can do everything I can at home I can't control others out in the real world. I just hope he never feels the way I felt growing up but I'm sure he does to some extent. As a parent, you just want your child to feel safe and loved. You don't ever want them to have to question if they are annoying or loved or for them to feel as though they're a burden. I have spent his entire life telling him he's loved and I've always made myself present and I hope he remembers that especially on my off days.