Just Wait (Mylot Exclusive #1998)

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Many people have been coming to me and saying, "Sir, the delicate little snowflakes who control the people who run MyLot have canceled your post from yesterday." I went and checked and discovered they are right. Last night's post is gone ((If you want to read it, don't despair. Just wait until I'm dead and it'll be in my "Lost Posts, Volume One")). I don't know why. All I said was that it was bigly wonderful that Charlie Kirk was killed. I guess I shouldn't be too surprised. The fragile flowers known as MAGA have had it rough lately. They lost Charlie Kirk, and then their Glorious Loser was nearly killed at the UN by Triple Sabotage. They have to lash out at someone and attacking Jimmy Kimmel just makes them look more feeble and useless, so why not move on to the next person on their list, which must be me? First, there was the escalator that malfunctioned. That's not a big deal for normal people but for an extremely weak and very elderly man like Dopey DonOld, climbing a flight of stairs could cause a fatal heart attack. His faithful followers are thanking Satan that he survived it but Dopey was then subjected to a broken teleprompter and an inadequate sound system. That's three seperate disasters! The cult is frustrated because they don't know who done it. I suspect it was the French because they love menage a trois's so much. I mentioned my theory to Fifi, my Sommelier and Chief Executive Vice President In Charge Of Alcoholic Affairs, and Arlette Bain-Marie, my favorite Upstairs Chef Garde Manger (Pantry Chef In English) and Chief Executive Vice President In Charge Of Pre & Post Meal Affairs, before we even got out of bed this morning. They said I was probably right and that means a lot because they are both French. So, I sincerely hope that this one doesn't offend any loudmouthed, talentless, low IQ cult members, but if it does, I think they should follow Dopey's medical advice. Inject a gallon of bleach and forget that Tylenol even exists. I need a smooth segue here, but I'm being told it just isn't in the budget tonight, so I'll just forge on. My favorite Meme this week isn't a meme at all. It's just a very short video on YouTube of someone saying, "If you don't like the way we're reacting to the death of Charlie Kirk, just brace yourself, cause you're really gonna hate what we do when Trump dies and you're not gonna have to wait very long." The "Trump Is Dead" celebrations are gonna dwarf the "Kirk Is Dead" celebrations by a country mile. I don't even know what a country mile is, but I bet they're really long. With that in mind, let's go to tonight, to see what the Cosmic Universal Anthem Monologue Of The Month Club Anthem Monologue is for today. ************* Trump Distracts from Epstein Files with Escalator Drama and Wages War on Tylenol & TikTok Jimmy Kimmel Live 21.4M subscribers