Do you have the Squirrel Syndrome?

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Winter comes soon unwittingly as the bliss elf knocks at the door of the new year,we all have the same wishes that hoping a better future.But life won't be so easy like casting a spell then magic will show up right now,some old memories just will haunt me.Day by day,it becomes a habit. Squirrel Syndrome means a person extremely lose the sense of safety and desperately love some particular things,like food,wine,post card,coins or any daily necessities,the more the better. For example,i'm a heavy squirrel syndrome patient.Since i was a child,i've been obsessed with the books,especially the unknown fate.I try to catch a gleam of light of the future,so my favorite things is reading history,politics and mystery books.i collect thousands of books on my portable hard drive.That's why i can write so many books. But fate is unpredicted,i had dreamed to be a great writer like Homer or Charles Dickens,all vanished after i found i live in Nazi Country- Communist China.I don't have the speech freedom,anytime i'll be arrested like Jews in the Third Reich.So i only can work like an underground writer,wish one day my books will be seen like "Anne Frank Diary" Surely,that's all my delusion.Disillusionment is my ending,so i call my doctrine "Disillusionism".But i never stop the steps of reading books and chasing the dawn.Maybe i'll be a firefly that never fly out of this Nazi dark era,but the God Jehovah will see my fragile life.I live for the light,I die for the light,i'm the Righteous,the Lot in Sodom waiting for the angel. Angel never gets close to me and helps me run away from China Nazi,but one day,there will come a day,Angel will take my soul to heaven,to the true free land.