My work buddy
By Sissy15
@sissy15 (13280)
United States
July 17, 2026 10:49pm CST
As I have mentioned previously, I work as a one-on-one aide. I have a buddy who is on the spectrum, and I absolutely love him. His mom and I joke that I am his work mom. This kid has done all of the things people told his parents he would never do. He was told he would never be able to do basic math or read, and he can do both of those things. He was nonverbal when he started school, and now he never shuts up and is the loudest human I know. He has had to work harder than the vast majority of his peers. He is one of the funniest humans I know. He keeps me on my toes. I never know what is going to come out of his mouth. He struggles so much socially because he wants to be accepted, and the kids in his group aren't the nicest or most understanding. They can't understand why he seems so weird.
He is one of the most amazing humans I know (apart from my own son), and the kids don't know what they're missing out on. He struggles so much, but man, is he smart. He isn't normal book-smart like some kids on the spectrum; he struggles academically, but what he knows he knows well.
He has things he's really into, and when he is into something, he learns everything about it. He was really into police officers and firefighters for a few years and he was spelling out words like "Police officer", "firefighter", and "Hazmat" at 6 years old, but couldn't read the word cat. He then got into WWII and countries. He could recognize most countries' flags and draw them. I have a picture somewhere that he drew of his world map, where he was technically supposed to draw what the world would look like if it were more polluted for Earth Day, but instead he drew every country's flag he could think of. We weren't mad, and we loved it. He is so impressive it's not even funny. He could also tell you about each of the countries he could name the flag for. Mind you, he was only in second grade. He can tell you when Hitler died and when Einstein was born. He can list all kinds of historical facts. My favorite is how he told everyone how Elvis Presley died on the toilet. They all thought he was lying.
He is now super into football. He knows all about it. He knows every team and draws team logos. He loves pro and college football. If you want to talk about impressive, he can tell you about every single Super Bowl. If you give him a year, he can tell you which two teams played, who won, and what the final score was. We were in shock. He did this for the talent show one year, and everyone was impressed. I love when some of the boys argue with him about it, and I get to pull out Google and show them he was right. They get so mean with him, so I love being able to prove to them how right he actually is. He is also a decent football player. He has worked hard to be able to play. I honestly believe part of his love of football was so he could fit in. The other boys never let him play until he learned how to play better, and even now, they give him some issues.
He works so hard to fit in, only for the other boys to still be mean to him. I wish they could see just how truly amazing he is. I think it's going to be a hindsight thing. I hope one day they have children of their own, and the reality of who they were to him hits them hard in the face.
To give you an idea of how funny this kid is, he once got in trouble for ding-dong ditching a third-grade teacher. It is still one of the funniest stories I have of him, not the funniest, but one of. He told me he had to use the bathroom, and I told him he could. It was taking a while, but I assumed it was because he was constipated or something. The next thing I know, he's getting in trouble because he had been sneaking out of the bathroom to knock on the teacher's door, who was next to us, and then hauling it back to the bathroom before she could see who it was. They have it on video. I didn't get to see the footage, but I guess he was doing a cartoonish, sneaky tiptoe to the door, knocking and then hauling it back to the bathroom to giggle as the teacher tried to figure out who it was. She complained to the principal that someone kept knocking on her door and leaving. That's when the principal pulled it up, and we all had a good laugh. We all had to be super serious with him, and he was in tears, because we needed him to know it was disruptive, but we all thought it was hilarious. I had to follow him to the bathroom again for a while after that.
He's such a funny kid, sometimes on purpose and sometimes not. For example the one day he was doing safety patrol and one of his friends got yelled at by an intervention specialist and my buddy goes "don't yell at him, that's my brother" and she looked at him and goes "no it is not" and he looked back at her very seriously and goes "Uh huh, that's my brother in Christ" and absolutely no one could argue with him. Later on, I can't remember exactly how the conversation went, but someone questioned him about that, and he goes, "I don't know, I just keep saying it because it makes everyone laugh". This kid is so funny and so sweet. I wish the whole world could see just how amazing he is.
He is so literal, as most spectrum kids are. I remember him coming up to me and telling me another kid told me he was deaf. I already had a feeling it wasn't how he took it. I talked to the kid, and he goes, "He said what, so I jokingly said, ya deaf, bro?" I then had to explain how he was literal, and they needed to remember that when dealing with him. I love that he's so funny, even when it's not intentional, like the time he informed us his mom was having cramps, something I still tease her about. I'm friends with his mom; she used to also be a para at my work.
I just wish kids could see him and kids like him for the amazing humans they are. Maybe one day.
6 people like this
5 responses
@anya12adwi (10336)
• India
18 Jul
I sometimes wonder as kids are blank canvas, where do learn that meanness?
2 people like this
@sissy15 (13280)
• United States
19 Jul
They learn meanness from the world, especially if they have mean people at home. Typically, if kids are terrible at school, they are dealing with something at home. Kids don't just decide to become bullies overnight; they are often in environments that are difficult, and they act out because their behavior is one of the few things they have any control over.
@AmbiePam (123157)
• United States
19 Jul
Is there a punishment for those kids being mean to him or is it one of those things they are forced to accept because it’s a public school and public schools don’t let you really discipline the kids short of the kid committing assault? Ideally, the rotten parents of these awful kids would do something, but that ain’t happening, is it.
I’m feeling disgusted by poor behavior today. I want to walk up to every person and say, how hard is it to be nice?!
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (123157)
• United States
19 Jul
@sissy15 I couldn’t do it. I could not teach in a public school. Now, my sister taught mostly in private, Christian schools, but two years she taught in public school the kids were still well behaved. Why? Because she taught in a rural area of Missouri where parents still disciplined their kids, and children still respected their teachers. I’m not saying country people are perfect, but they are as heck keep their kids in line better. And the teachers didn’t have to tiptoe around misbehaving children because the school endorsed punishing bad behavior.
We need better training, more teachers, better pay, and parents that take responsibility. It’s no wonder people are homeschooling their children. And teachers hands are mostly tied.
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (123157)
• United States
19 Jul
@sissy15 I guess I am lucky to know the kids I know who are homeschooled. They are all well behaved, are keeping up with their age level or above in achievement tests, and are good example of homeschooled children. Now, that I think about it though, these kids all grew up in church. And around here, if you’re in church (in Oklahoma anyway), you best know how to behave. So that helps. Then again, my sister homeschools her children, but she IS a teacher. She has her Masters so she’s the perfect person to homeschool kids.
A lady in our church just started homeschooling her tween daughter. Some kid in class was handing out candy, and her tween ate it. Only, it was laced with something. It didn’t take any more than that to pull her out of public school and start homeschooling. That would have terrified me too.
1 person likes this
@sissy15 (13280)
• United States
19 Jul
@AmbiePam I don't disagree; I am not a big believer in spanking kids, but I also believe you can punish without spanking if you start early. It's as simple as having consequences for actions. When my kid acted up, I took stuff away. I explained to him that what he did was wrong, and I would ask him if he understood why he was in trouble. I didn't just scream at my kid; I explained why he was in trouble, I explained that I love him enough to want better for him, and that's why I discipline him. So many kids get screamed at and aren't told why. People think they can spoil their kids and be lazy and not parent, and their kids will be fine, and they create a sense of entitlement. Then there are the other parents, the ones who beat and abuse their kids and scream at them or do things in front of their kids that their children shouldn't see. There are two extremes. Either they spoil them, or they are too harsh with them.
Kids need to know they are loved and that they have boundaries. The adults in their lives need to put them first. A kid shouldn't have to watch their parents beat up another parent. They shouldn't be witness to the adults treating each other terribly. They shouldn't be given complete free rein. There needs to be set limits.
I am not the perfect parent, but my kid knows right from wrong, and he flat-out told me he would rather go to jail than have to deal with us. He knows he is loved beyond reason, but he also knows actions have consequences, and those started the second he started walking and talking. The longer you wait to discipline the harder it's going to be, because once kids get bigger, they are more set in their ways and it's harder to have a handle on things.
The problem is that some of the people homeschooling are part of the problem. Some of them aren't doing their part at home. We had a few kids who came to public school after being homeschooled, and their behavior was atrocious. They didn't know how to behave or act in a public setting. Not all homeschool kids are this way, but when the parents are the problem, they are still a problem whether they are homeschooled or not. The problem now has less to do with schools and more to do with parents. Schools can only do so much when the parents aren't enforcing anything at home. They expect teachers to do everything. I always explain it this way: imagine having a classroom of 20-plus kids all with different needs, and with the vast majority having behavioral issues. Now imagine having all of these kids sit in one room with if you're lucky, two adults (if they have a para), and you have to explain it so all of these different kids, who all learn differently and struggle to sit down, let alone pay attention, can understand. You have some intervention come in if you are lucky, you have some groups if you're lucky, but you don't have the ability to do one-on-one with every single student, then these kids struggle, and the parent automatically blames the teacher instead of trying to help them at home. I know parents aren't teachers, but if you can find a way to help your kid, you should. We had a parent who emailed every single day about her kid, and her kid was part of the problem with his behavior. He was rude, disrespectful, and a bully. His mom was complaining he needed more help, and she thought the teacher should hold his hand, finally she explained that while she would love to help more, she was too busy sending letters about behavior and trying to keep other kids from being punched in the face. After that, the parent calmed down a bit.
I will say that the parent seemed a little more on top of things, but one of her sons is a problem. She has twins, and they are polar opposites. One does much better in school and listens better. The other is a pain in my side. The issue is that she genuinely doesn't understand how difficult it is to help her child who is making choices in class to not pay attention. He causes distractions, yells out, and argues with adults, but he doesn't do that for her. The teachers said he genuinely seems afraid of her when they are in meetings with her, and he is with her. Instead, he acts terribly at school. Anyway, yeah, the problem is usually parenting. Schools can only do so much.
