Kids acting and dressing older than they are

Canada
December 4, 2006 3:23pm CST
I was at the mall yesterday and I saw these girls. They couldn't have been older than 10. All of them were wearing make-up, tight fitting clothes, and shoes that had a bit of a heel on them. They seriously looked like mini 16 year olds. When I was 10 I was still wearing sweatshirts with kitties on them, and I wasn't even allowed to wear mascara until I was 13, let alone a full face of makeup. Why are parents letting their children dress and act older than their age? Do you think that kids are growing up faster nowadays? I have an 11 month old daughter and I'm afraid of what things are going to be like by the time she's a preteen. I want her to fit in and have lots of friends, but I'm definitely not going to let her wear makeup and act like a teenager when she should just be a kid. What are your thoughts?
57 people like this
384 responses
@rosey2006 (945)
• United States
4 Dec 06
I feel the same way. I don't understand why we need the teens in this day and age wear skin tight clothes. It's really sad.
@mpvengat (155)
• India
5 Dec 06
yes really, teens are doing this saying it a fashion but it really ruins the culture over countries of the world.
• India
5 Dec 06
it just doesnt end at the clothing its more than that its the attitude my little cousin gosh she seems older than me when she starts talkin all bout life n things. OVEREXPOSURE TO EVERYTHING is responsible for this
1 person likes this
• Philippines
5 Dec 06
This is progress for us. Kids just know more today (not exactly a good thing) because of the multimedia present in our midst. It really is sad.
1 person likes this
@LadyCroft (704)
• Australia
4 Dec 06
Alot of the excuses I hear ae that these "newage" arents let their children express themselves how they want to. I am so glad I dont have girls. I have 2 boys and I believe that if I did have a 10 year old girl instead of my 10 year old son, there woud be toe-toe arguments about how she is going to dress until I say she is old enough to be a little britney spears. It doesnt help that these "teen idols" dress like this. But sadly it is the parents that need some waking up. They would be the first to say why if thier little "angel" was raped or sexually assaulted.
8 people like this
• Canada
4 Dec 06
I completely agree. When you have 20 and 30 year olds checking out your 10 year old daughter because she's dressing provocatively, you have a problem.
3 people like this
• Australia
5 Dec 06
I cant even believe you are questioning this. Not once did I mention that boys are not sexually molested, but you cannot deny there are more male predators out there praying on young girls. And as for my boys dressing as punks??? If they are of an age where they can make these decisions who am I to change them, being a punk or a goth or even gay doesnt put them in harms way like a 10 year old girl in almost nothing. These parents have to give these kids the money or the clothing, we do have the power to tell our children what to wear or how to act while they are still babies. and believe me a 10 year old is a baby.
4 people like this
@gabs8513 (48708)
• United Kingdom
4 Dec 06
Yes Kids are older for their Age I was lucky with my Daughter who now is 19 She like me doesn't like Skirts lol I love high heels always have but my daughter prefers low heels lol It always depends to how they see their Mum acting dressing and things like that and of course what crowd they hang out with It is not easy but point in the right direction and it should be ok
7 people like this
• India
5 Dec 06
Children in the age group of 10 to 14years is behaving like elder due to their knowledge exposed to bigger thoughts. In my home they are acting like teachers to the lower age group children. They prompting the actuals, that a experienced teacher can't exhibits such a zeal in their regular teachings. Innovation is the mother of passion is proved again and again.
@srhelmer (7033)
• Beaver Dam, Wisconsin
4 Dec 06
Tell me about it. And, it doesn't stop at the tight clothes and makeup. Many of them have thongs sticking out of the back of their pants. I can only hope that, by the time my daughter is that age, clothing styles will be much more conservative.
6 people like this
• India
5 Dec 06
Well, things surely change with time. Yes, there was a time when everybody maintained a secorum when they dressed, but it's no more the case now, you have celebrities, who I feel are the primary culprits in inducing such a craze. Children are impressionable and in this age of unwanted exposure, however hard you try, they will certainly imbibe such a culture. It would be hard on your child if you deny her something which everybody else has. She would become a rebel if you try to suppress the free spirit in her, I'd suggest you better move to a more conservative place, like the Country side or something if you wnat to have a say in this matter. I'm sorry if I've said anything wrong in my comment, I beg for forgiveness. Good day to you, bye.
• United States
5 Dec 06
I wrote a page on my blog yesterday about a similar thing. I have a daughter who is 13 and she thinks I'm the meanest woman in the world because I will not let her wear belly shirts with a navel ring. She thinks I'm trying to make her dress like it's 1956 instead of 2006. We go round and round. It's distressing. Susan http://GettingPastYourPast.wordpress.com
• India
5 Dec 06
well,u r right but putting restrictions on them will make u seen as a old and narrow minded person,u can only talk to them,explian them the hazards of what they r doing,and make them understand..........
@mansha (6301)
• India
4 Dec 06
Blame it on generation gap.Our parents used to say that too....oh we never did that when we were that young....their parent did the same.With each generations there has been this problem of non-confoormity and kids will be kids.the way you describe those girls,I can really picture few stupid girls sneaking behind their parent's back in order to look older and get attention.This will be something they will remember when they will be old like you and me.I know a person who actually had stuffed oranges in her bra and went to the night club and pointing at them with her finger told the bouncer that she is eighteen.Now the story seems funny but if you see from her mother's point of view its horrifying too.The girl turned out all right and is a sensible career girl -was excellent in her studies too. I think we should not blow our tops off at every turn a teenager makes/They are little kids trying to act as grown ups.Its a very confusding junction of life.You need to understand that.We need not make an issue out of everything.they are entitled to color their hair experiment with makeup,styles and fashion-this is just a normal way of trying to find their identity by hit and trial method.we can act as advisorsif they want us to and allow us to.SOme leeway,some ground rules mix of these will help your daughter see direction.No rigidity and no dictatorship but be flexible is right approach.
5 people like this
• Canada
4 Dec 06
I understand where you're coming from. I really do. Being a teenager is hard and they should be allowed to experiment with things like their hair, clothes and makeup. I wouldn't have even given it a second thought if the girls I saw were teenagers. But they weren't. They were little girls. I think that the problem goes beyond them trying to find their identity when there's 30 year olds that are checking them out.
3 people like this
• United States
6 Dec 06
Heeeeeeeeeey! I'm not old! LOL
@suedarr (2382)
• Canada
4 Dec 06
I agree with you. And children that are dressed like that are disturbing to say the least. My 11 year old uses play make-up sometimes at home, but never at school or while we are out in public. I know what you mean about wanting your child to fit in, but I've found with my own kids they made friends with other kids who had similar rules at their homes.
5 people like this
• Lithuania
5 Dec 06
I agree. Kids are growing very fast and they want to be adult.
1 person likes this
@amy0214 (1513)
• United States
4 Dec 06
kids are growing up a lot faster now days. i have a 2 month old and she is not going to be dressing like that
4 people like this
• United States
6 Dec 06
And neither is mine!
@asteroid8 (916)
• Italy
4 Dec 06
I know, at the present, children are going to become bigger before the time, and this is not always a good thing. Expecially for the girls, they want to seem like a woman when they are very small. They want to use make-up and dirty clothes, but they don't know that it's too early. I think that parents should educate them to respect the age they have, or they will become men and women at 10 years old!
3 people like this
@masoud02 (176)
• Oman
5 Dec 06
The fundamental problem lies with the parents and the life style of nawadays.Parents need to blame no one else for this,but themselves."too much of freedom can be detrimental"
3 people like this
• United States
5 Dec 06
Speaking of Britney Spears, etal.......and allowing your daughters their space. To an extent you have to allow them to be themselves but we must have limits. With no boundaries they become adults with no boundaries. Adults with no boundaries become my neighbors in the one cursed house on my block. Anyone moving in that house thinks I run a free daycare center or arrive at my home in their bathrobes. I found one neighbor sitting on my living room couch in a "bathrobe" while my husband was coming out of the shower in a towel! Just out of curiousity, I wonder how many of these Britney Spears wannabees end up pregnant before they're ready?
• United States
5 Dec 06
I bet a lot of the Britney Spear wanna bees become pregnant before they should.Shes becoming a worse example for kids than ever.Did you know the other day she wasn't wearing underwear and when a photographer took a picture it showed everything.I mean come on someone who kids wanted to be pulling a thing like that.It's sad really that the women girls look up to are so covered with makeup and eat practicly nothing.Who have bodies no normal person could ever really have.It makes girls feel inadequte and I know because I hear it from many girls.
• United States
4 Dec 06
Well my "opinion" is that it is disgusting for anyone of any age to dress that way and just plain irresponsible parenting to allow your child to do so!
• United States
5 Dec 06
Anyone of any age? I started dressing sexy in my 20s and still do so now, just now around my daughter. This is only when my husband and I go out.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Dec 06
Oops, I mean,just,"not" around my daughter.
1 person likes this
@kannan86 (208)
• India
5 Dec 06
yes the parents are pampering the kids a lot now a days! in the name of love the are doing foolish things.i mean they are not consious about it.i think,a kid's styles are more encouraged by the movie stars and music artists.these people have grate attraction amoung the public .kids see these people and try to immitate them or try to feel as if they are one. the solution could be that kids should not be allow to see such A movies and albums, though there is a rule at the theaters,nobody can restrict them at house. ultimately the parents are the one who can find solution for this.they have to realise and concentrate on their kids behavious and attitude.
2 people like this
@dmzamora (112)
• Philippines
4 Dec 06
I think it is the same thing for people not just in your country. In ours, Kids, literally kids dress like they are all grown ups.. i mean, it is not bad actually it's just that these kids seem like they want to skip all the fun things of being one! I f you kno what I mean.. These children should be guided and not coerced to become adults at such a young age.
2 people like this
@yugi_sen (1741)
• India
5 Dec 06
yes, you are right. kids think they are grown up and start dressing up like that.. parents are also allowing then since they think they are getting modernised.. it willlead to a big cultural loss..
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Dec 06
also too theirs can dress up Nice and when theirs Get somewhere else without theirs parent around theirs will changed theirs Look around in Local Public bathroom
• United States
5 Dec 06
also too theirs can dress up Nice and when theirs Get somewhere else without theirs parent around theirs will changed theirs Look around in Local Public bathroom
@emarie (5447)
• United States
5 Dec 06
well, i think it starts from when they're young and the impressons girls get from the media. now i'm not saying don't blame the parents, they should. when i got into HS i did dress slightly older then i was, but a 10yr old shouldn't be worrying about these type of things. they don't need attention from the boys yet. some parents buy these type of clothes because they think its cute, or the don't want to restrict the child from wearing what they want OR they dress that way themselves, i've seen this happen plenty of time. my sister has a god daughter and they let her wear (she was only 5 or 6) a pink halter top with hot pants and little platform shoes...to CHURCH! no i was only a child (13) but i still thought that was a little wrong. Parent who do this: your child is not a little dress up doll...try to fight the urge to do this to them. we're parents we have to draw lines somewhere to help our child grow up nicely in todays society.
1 person likes this
• India
29 Dec 06
i agree with you media has a great role in influencing the kids. They are the ones introducing them new fashions and makeups. We cant do much about it but the parents sure can!
@micheller (1365)
• United States
5 Dec 06
that is way out of hand. a 10 year old should not be dressing like that. were these girls by their selfs at the mall? i agree that kids are TRYING to grow up to fast nowadays.
1 person likes this
• Saint Lucia
5 Dec 06
they don't only act like they're older, they sometimes even do things older women have never done.
1 person likes this
@antidote (108)
• India
5 Dec 06
yes u shud giv e her a bit freedom n let her adjsut jerself
1 person likes this
@apoorvk (18)
• India
5 Dec 06
Yes, certainly... I do agree with you... Kids can be wonderful, but let's face it, parenting is no easy task. Being a brand new mom or dad can feel overwhelming, too. Here are a few tips that would help you a long way... in parenting... * STEP 1: We focus on the positive, make sure everyone has a clear understanding of expectations, and established ground rules at a very early age. * STEP 2: Establish routines early in your child’s life for bedtime, meals, and playtime. I know it’s hard when asked ‘just a few more minutes’ but you must stand firm. It actually makes things easier for everyone. * STEP 3: Meet with their teachers at the beginning of the school year to understand their teaching styles and requirements. Again to set expectations for the kids. * STEP 4: Your kids are also aware of their responsibilities at home too because you have established ground rules. * STEP 5: The foundation has been set and you’ve begun notice a few infractions, its best to take action immediately before things escalate. * STEP 6: 1st time: Calmly discuss the infraction, find out what happened, and make sure the child agrees it won’t happen again. * STEP 7: 2nd time: Repeat previous discussion but also ask how the child intends to prevent this from occurring again. And what are the consequences if it happens again. * STEP 8: 3rd time: Now it’s time to step back and evaluate the situation closely. Is the child looking for attention and the only time it’s provided is when there’s a problem? Are there issues at home or school you’re not aware of? Are there physiological issues such as entering puberty? You want to eliminate all possibilities before you have this discussion. * STEP 9: If you’re mad don’t have the discussion. If you say something in anger, you can never take it back. ‘I’m sorry’ won’t erase it. Let the child know you’re aware of what happened, you will talk about it later and what the punishment will be. This will give you an opportunity to calm down and make the child worry. * STEP 10: If you’re married have a strategy meeting to discuss the game plan and punishment. Make sure you’re both in agreement before you meet with your child. You have to present a united front. * STEP 11: Don’t drag it out….both of you meet with the child to have this discussion within a day or two after the occurrence. Allow everyone an opportunity to speak without interruptions. The goal as parents is to truly understand what caused your child to do this. Make sure the punishment fits the crime and don’t give in once implemented. If no TV for 2 weeks, that means 2 weeks.
@sbeauty (5869)
• United States
5 Dec 06
I think it's terrible that parents are allowing preteens to go around looking like hookers. These girls are showing a sexuality they don't have the maturity to handle. They are also inviting predators. Keep your daughter young as long as you can. Being a kid lasts such a short time compared to how long a person is an adult. Adulthood goes on forever. Teach her to play, give her lots of outside interests and activities, help her find the right friends. She'll be okay. I have 2 14-year-old step-granddaughters from different families. One has looked like she was 18 or 20 ever since she was 10. She is tall for her age and already looks older than she is and she plays it up with make-up and sexy clothes. She's been boy-crazy for several years now. She does poorly in school and will probably drop out before she graduates. Her mom was the same way as a girl, and even though she had her problems caused by her behavior, she's allowing her daughter to follow the same path. The other granddaughter has been carefully guided, and maybe even over-protected, throughout her life. She is in dance, bowling, tennis, and other activities. She has a ton of friends. However, she's small and still looks like a young girl. There's nothing sexy about her, and she isn't the least interested in boys. She's also a straight A student. I think most of your daughter's values will depend on what you are teaching her starting right now. You can help her form a lot of values even before she goes to school which can be firmly entrenched by the time she hits the preteen years.
1 person likes this
@twowizdom (861)
• Philippines
5 Dec 06
I do agree to all of you, I really don't get it why do kids tend to act like these when they're not supposed to and besides as time goes by kids act more matured than any of other older people.
1 person likes this
• India
5 Dec 06
Completely agree with you.Kids nowadays are getting very fussy about their looks.The comparison is not between how well mannered or how good the other one is in studies but the comparison is am i looking better than her.This is a very serious issues...if not controlled than the kids my land up worrying about their looks alone.I have a 7years old daughter although she is good at studies but is very fussy about her looks.She keeps on making face in the mirror.Have to b very strict with the kids at times as they think that parents know nothing about it and they r the better judge themselves.