Living w/ the Person Whom You love but Who doesn't Love You--Can You Handle It?

Philippines
December 7, 2006 6:27am CST
things have change on my 24th year of existence, just this year, i didn't imagine of doing one of the most unusual things i can do in my life, and guess what, i did it and even went beyond it; the situation of live-in status. what's funny is, things are going well on the start of the set-up, and true happiness is there...but as time goes by, her feeling of being with me starts to fade...and the feeling of falling out of love glares...i truly love the person, for im bound to live my whole life with her...but as we live each day together, i see emptiness on her already and not happiness...arguments arise and explodes...but im still believing that things will go well one day...so the big question is..how far can u go on if u are on my shoes?
15 responses
• Philippines
2 Mar 11
Did you try discussing with her about the problems in your relationships? Maybe she has something to say but can't say it at all because of whats holding her back, but the best thing to do is talking it out with her and let her say her piece before you conclude cause she may have something much more to talk about.
@JC1969 (1226)
• United States
8 Dec 06
If the love fades, you cannot stay in a loveless relationship just for the sake of staying, or because you still feel something. The real question is, what have you done to address the situation you are observing and living in? If you and she are willing to communicate about the issue at hand, then maybe there is a way to rekindle the relationship. But, a relationship is two people who are individuals that come together because their individual lives compliment each other's life, and they must them both work together to compromise and develop the relationship. If one person is unwilling to work on the relationship, then you need to get out of the relationship. But, you first need to open up to your loved one and tell her what you feel and see happening to the relationship, and see if there is a common ground you both can get on to try and work things out. If not, then you should get out of the relationship. good-luck to you.
@Bbilal (1998)
8 Dec 06
Love hurts  - Love hurts
The only way is to leave her. And enjoy you'r life.
@bkpdp1 (920)
• India
8 Dec 06
The person who gets involved into this, only he/she can understand the panic of the situation. I would rather like to say that, still it can be handled with utmost care to get back to the normal life. Think, whom you loved very much is not returning back the same amount of affection/love you expect from him/her. If you will give your true love to anybody, a little or more response will you definitely get. Still if you are not getting any returns, then you should analyze yourself, bcoz there may some silly mistakes you may have done for anything i do not know, for which he/she had bad impression about you. If you are ok from your side then, i don't think it is possible without any reason, somebody will ignore other's love/affection if it is fair. If you still love him/her, please be co-operative with the concerned as far as possible.. give the full freedom to him/her and watch as a spy. If he/she misuse his/her independence then you should be understand that you are running behind a ..... in the desert which never gives water...
• India
8 Dec 06
its very important to be loved in a living relationship
• India
8 Dec 06
no i can't handle it bcoz there is no meaning for caring for that kind of people.
@SViswan (12065)
• India
8 Dec 06
I would go on in the situation hoping it would get better. I know things might not change and I need to move on. But personally I don't think I have the guts to do it. I would just continue in the relationship fooling myself and making excuses for my partner:( But if someone asked me for advice, I would tell them to leave and find someone who loves them.
@Nahara (1673)
• Israel
8 Dec 06
If your love is strong then just wait till she'll come around and try to talk to her maybe there's something else that is bothering her, don't give up that easily cause true love is hard to find and the minute u'll let her know how u feel maybe everything would be clearer well good luck to u and let us know how it went i'm crossing my fingers to u:-)
• Philippines
8 Dec 06
no, i don't think it will work. for a relationship to succeed, both must love each other back, it must be mutual. if the one you love does'not love you or loves someone else, then set him/her free, i guess that's true meaning of love. the joy finding one's happiness.
@MissGia (955)
• United States
8 Dec 06
i wouldnt be able to go very far in your shoes. I would not spend my days with someone who doesnt love me, when i have seen that the love is gone, it's over. if she doesnt love you and you really love her, you'll let it go. But thats what i believe, its ultimatley up to you to do something about it. sit her down and come out with it, tell her how you feel, alot can be resolved by talking.
• India
8 Dec 06
u shuld respect eachother and what the other person is thinking... it should never be the 'i' attitude but the 'we' one... like and be with eachother at all times.... hey c'mon u can do this!
@Tanya8 (1734)
• Canada
8 Dec 06
That's a very difficult situation to be in. A person above mentioned children, but I didn't get the impression you have children from you post. I will offer some advice, that will be very hard to follow, but I was in a similar situation at age 24. I loved someone who didn't love me, and was probably just passing time with me, until something better came along. I kick myself for not being the one to end it first,. It ultimately felt worse, that I had no control over the situation when he did finally break up with me, and it was difficult to move on. You deserve to be with someone who loves you equally. If you can somehow get the logical side of you to overrule your heart, my guess is that you'll be happier in the long run. Good luck.
• Philippines
8 Dec 06
its all up to you on how far can you take the arguments everyday.. if you think there is still love go for it.. but if there is no hope just let go. that is only my point of view.
@ru88en (2997)
• Philippines
8 Dec 06
I believe you can do this. If all for the sake of your children, then go ahead. We can love without being loved and this is not impossible. Just let go that person if in doing so worsen the situation. Be their to love your child even if your partner doesn't love you anymore. This may not be the best opinion I believe and it is up to you. Wish you all the best.
@gnuehc (41)
7 Dec 06
can you really cope with having to see how unhappy your loved one is everyday? if you really feel that you can patch things up with her then talk to her, get her to be honest. if she really does want to leave, then you're just gonna have to let her. if you love someone then sometimes the best thing is to set them free.