my family wont speak to me because I couldnt keep my troubled niece:

It is ..I think they felt since I spend much time praying I would be able to wave some type of magic wand over the teen and she would be perfect..She needs help..but even I cant produce what she needs..I am last in line for her ..I am praying and hurting for her everyday..I worry about what will becomce of her. I am sure worrying accomplishes nothing so I should simply pray. Thanks for your support ..It is awful to receive such treatment during the holidays ..it really brings me down!

The child was not with her mother but with her father who has several time had other mother figures. She has a very low self esteem and uncontrollable anger.. I know I thought love could extinguish the burning flames in her but it simply could not. And my family is blaming me and blocking me out of their lives for trying ..I was last in line..I wonder if each one of them experienced what they are now doing to me?

Niece's parents were those who asked me to try ..and they are the one's sending such hateful silent treatment..My mom wont talk to me..even though she too had the teen with her and called for help of the local police. The teens mother and grandmother had her and both returned her to her father.. The teen claims to be deathly afraid of "daddy" but begs to go back all the time I merely had her 10 days and lost so much.. I wouldnt mind the loss if there was some sign of gratitude I emptied my savings..and for what..to be ostricized and kicked out the the family circle?

ok i will try this ..thanks for the advise.

They "all" had their try .I was the last one to resort too.. Her father cannot handle her .and her mother who is separated from her father tried. My mother tried..she is so very ill .. and the little girl carried on too.. Everyone who has had her experienced the same thing..

There frustrated and they put the blame on you becaue they have n one else to blame

They wont speak to me ..I send emails ..no one answers..It is safer first inaudibly..I think..and they don't answer any of them.

Over 600 miles..I spent over 600 dollars on my niece driving there and back home here to pick her up so she wouldnt be on bus alone.. I dont think they realize I have emptied my little savings and gave all I had to try to help..not one thank you ..Only blame!

when you send the emails do you ask for a read reciept just to see if they had read them? just wondering, how far away do they live if not far have you tried face to face?

Yes it was my choice to try ..they all begged me and assured me that she would be nice perhaps if she was in a one on one situation..That didnt happened ..I asked if they come get her since I was too poor to afford the expenses again..All my savings are gone. That is what initiated all the conflict ..they expected me to drive all the way back down on my own money again..which I had depleted bringing her up..there was no help with money on their end.

Everyone has tried to help my niece..If it were asked I would say there is some very serious abuse going on where she lives and no one will be able to handle her till someone investigates the household where she lives.

I believe it is because it's holidays that it hurts so very much.. I love my family dearly and that is why originally I agreed to give this child a chance.. I drove over 1300 miles to get her..it was over 650 miles there and equally the same back. I spent over 400 dollars in hotel expenses ..of course I took a friend who promised if I did she would pay her share..that's another story. Love only is able to hurt.. because love is so deep .. I would have loved a thank you since no one helped pay any of the expenses and perhaps blaming me for lack of success was their way out of paying me for half of what I paid out for this child.. I clothed fed, and supplied her with more than what she needed..so I am praying ..for a miracle yet to happen this christmas!

I dont believe in giving the "silent treatment" it is cruel and heartless..in my opinion.

Yes cold shoulder and blame ..Blame for what could not be mine since she is 13 and should never been allowed to get so far without proper treatment..Blaming is easier than saying "thank you " for trying and we will pay her way back and help pay for any expenses you incurred with her..but no..blaming covers up all their responsability.. I forgive them..but it hurts very dearly!!!

I believe you hit the right answer here. I believe they are mad because they tried and failed and looked up to me and thought I had some sort of magic wand to wave over her.. She has had 13 years of no treatment for her problems..And I fear that each year she goes without treatment she will grow more and more dangerous to herself and others.

Everyone has at one time tried to tell my brother his child needs help.. He wont do it..And personally I think there is a reason..as there are reasons this child has problems and bringing her to counseling will probably reveal that the home she is in is very disfunctional..There are things I probably don't know happened..It is evident..that violence is the method of handling things in that home.. By the way this young girl responds to correction ..

You got the picture right.. i live over 650 miles away from them..it took a great sacrifice and all my savings to even get over there and gather up the child.. I was assured that if she didnt make it with me ..they would make arrangements to have her sent back.. When the if popped up and she was showing serious signs of violence and disrespect they turned equally violent in words towards me and said that if I wanted to get rid of her ..I had to supply the funds..I have no more I am broke to this whole situation.. Anyway ..she got worse and worse..the daddy kept promising he would come get her ..one day ..next day..this only sparked flames in the little girls fire..She kept asking her daddy to say on the phone 'He wanted her' It has been a night mare ..Because I couldnt handle her and asked for outside help over here on myside due to depleted funds they are angry with me.. They made no effort to send money ..they simply wanted me to keep using mine.. They promised to send "50" to offset the 600 I spent ..that even didnt arrive..They claimed it was sent..but .. it never got here.

They thought because I go to church daily that perhaps ? I could work some kind of miracle everyone else failed to do. They put some kind of expectations on me since I do go to Church and have a clean life. .She rebelled against me as she did everyone else.

Sorry I will not put myself in that situation again.. My niece has serious problems which has shaken me up from head to toe. I hid all sharp objects in my house; I was so afraid of her!

After causing much disturbance and my house and refusing to listen and my contacting local authorities..she returned home after much fuss.. That is why my family is upset..that I returned her home..They refused to come get her.. I couldnt handle her so I asked for help on myside.. I am broke from having her come here and had no money to send her back..since I am single and live on the income I make myself.

I know this and it should be consoling but as you know when family is involved there is something much deep when it comes to pain.. Friends and even strangers acting this way is much easier to cope with then family members ostricizing you for something you had no control over.

I have been trying the 3 c's ..I am out here in West Virginia they are out there in Wisconsin..all my efforts to help cost me dearly ..I am broke and because my paycheck happened to be late this weekend in the red in my bank account all because of this situation.. It costs more than tears ..+

Will try.. waiting is fine. I can't deny, however, how it makes me feel .. I am human and part of our human make-up is our emotions.!