How To Cope With Out Of Hand Kids?

I recommend the book, "How to Talk so Kids will Listen, and Listen so Kids will Talk". http://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Kids-Will-Listen/dp/0380811960/sr=8-1/qid=1165821991/ref=pd_bbs_1/102-8684049-8388155?ie=UTF8&s=books One of the main messages is that the only person you can control is yourself. Thus, if your child is back-talking, instead of focusing on what you are going to do to MAKE them stop, you restrict your actions to yourself. For example, you walk away and say, "I will listen when you're prepared to speak to me in a nicer tone". Instead of trying to keep a defiant child in his or her room, you say, "I need a break from you, and go into your own room and read or do something you enjoy." With back talk, I'll add that sometimes kids simply do not know the polite way to say what they're trying to say. I often offer a rephrasing, if my kids say something that sounds rude to me, and they'll usually try again. It avoids having to have a huge scene, and after a few times, they usually remember to say whatever it is the polite way.