Why cant I have a wife and a girlfriend?
By cclay34
@cclay34 (486)
United States
December 12, 2006 9:20am CST
Why cant I have a wife and a girlfriend? As long as I love and support my wife and our relationship isnt suffering then why cant I have a girlfriend on the side? I would think it would make life easier on both of them, When one wasnt in the mood then you could just sleep with the other and vice versa. As long as you were keeping both happy and satisfied i cant see where there would be a problem
144 responses
@imadriscoll (2228)
• United States
12 Dec 06
If you were my husband and you were posting this crap on the internet you'd find yourself sleeping on the couch ... then maybe you'd start to realize how old you really are. I think that you probably posted this to get a response out of people, since you just admitted that you don't want a girlfriend. In which case why don't you stick to the truth? Or perhaps the truth of the matter is your wife gave you a piece of her mind about this post of yours and you find yourself not able to sleep on that couch of yours so you're starting to retract your desire to want a girlfriend.
@crystal8577 (1466)
• United States
12 Dec 06
This just rubs me the wrong way. If you are not mature enough to handle a wife then it is time for a divorce & then go ahead & have girlfriends galore. If your wife is not in the mood, then maybe you should service yourself instead of cheating on her.
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
13 Dec 06
Yep it works for me...and I also know another person who has a poly relationship and from what i understnd it works for them too....Its definately not for everyone of course but for some of us it works fine and doesnt make us any less mature nor does it make us undevoted or unable to love/commit etc etc
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
13 Dec 06
What if the wife agrees to the arrangement? What if the wife is perfectly happy with the situation, likes and gets along with the girlfriend, and gives them both her blessing? It's not cheating anymore, is it?
I know plenty of people in open/polyamorous relationships and they all do fine and are very much in love.
@icequeen (2840)
• Canada
13 Dec 06
Uh...maybe because it's not right...You took an oath before God..when you married your wife...to love, honor..etc. Do you really think you are honoring her by messing around behind her back...I take it neither of them know about the other...so you are just lying to both of them and telling them what they want to hear...Good luck..because the game can only last for so long....until it blows up in your face....
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
13 Dec 06
Not everyone has a secular marriage. Not everyone swears before God.
@ChewySpree (1832)
• United States
12 Dec 06
It depends on your wife and your girlfriend, doesn't it? Have you talked to your wife about this? If she agrees or encourages it, it would just be something you worked out between yourselves. If you go behind her back, that's just being deceptive and that would most likely hurt your wife. You don't want to do that, do you?
@ChewySpree (1832)
• United States
12 Dec 06
You are right that it takes a special kind of person and relationship to make an open relationship work. Many people think it sounds appealing in theory and then it falls apart when it becomes a reality.
@jillybeans (536)
• United States
12 Dec 06
To each his own and if it works for you and your wife and your g/f then that's great, not something I would want in my life though
@ezymoney (876)
• Australia
13 Dec 06
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@GrammaFood (716)
• United States
12 Dec 06
Then why did you get married,and just make sure your wife can have a boy friend,so then when she gets pregnany you can and will have to accept the child as yours because whats good for you is good for her. Just think of it,how would it make you feel if your wife took on a boyfriend to satisfy her? Guess it wouldn't say to much about you or your relationship now would it! Can you see telling your friends and family that you each sleep around with other people because she's not woman enough and your not man enough to satisfy each other! Then get divorced! You can't have your cake and eat it to.
@maryannemax (12156)
• Sweden
12 Dec 06
huh? that's so complicated... no woman would like to have a husband who has another girlfriend as a reserve! that's so rude! that's unfair! and immoral. you need to choose who you wanna be with. you have to make up your mind!
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
12 Dec 06
thats not true for everyone though.....If my hubby wanted someone on the side I'd be all for it so long as he told me first, used protection and didnt bring her to our home...all the power to him I say...
@kcbabez14 (967)
• United States
12 Dec 06
WEll lets put it this way! Marriage is scared and ment for only two people! NO OUTSIDERS! You are dedicated to your wife and only her and she is to do the same! How would you feel if she had a boyfriend on the side! If you want to have other relations then you really shouldn't be married!
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
13 Dec 06
That's your view of marriage. Not everyone has the same idea of what a marriage is. One person's definition isn't everyone's. Just something to keep in mind.
@xxclairexxj (590)
•
12 Dec 06
How would you feel if it was the other way around? Would you be happy for your your wife to have a boyfriend on the side? It would probably make you feel unwanted, insecure, jealous... all the things she probably would! I don't expect you could really keep them both satisfied to be honest!!
@marymaejazmine83 (470)
• Philippines
13 Dec 06
you should stick to one. i think you dont love your wife that much. because if you love her, you be blinded by love. you would not find any one to satisfy you..
@roadromeo (376)
• India
13 Dec 06
a wife or a girlfriend is something that is personal to a husband or a boyfriend and vice versa. would you like if u r wife has the same thoughts about u and she can have another boyfriend as long as she keeps u happy. what's the point in being married then. Let the whole female source in the world be ur girlfriend
@remaster74 (4064)
• Greece
13 Dec 06
Ok! So, why don't you leave your wife to have a boyfriend? You know for these days that you are not in the mood to "eat home cooked meal" and you wish to "eat at the taverns".
@oneteam (57)
• United States
13 Dec 06
well I have read the question..some answers and your response
I love some of the comments about aleeping on the couch. any wife would not even like that question asked in Fun..
You did not say how long you were married.
As someone who has been married or for someone thinking of marriage.. they need to really know what marriage is andpray about it. Unfortuantly.. people take marriage way to causual today.. It is suppose to be a lifetime commitment between 2 soulmates. I cannot imaGINE my life without my hubby.
@siddharth_sampad (319)
• India
13 Dec 06
ha ha nice one but if u wanna be safe n sound without broken bones then plz dont think bout it!!
a bird in hand is better than two in bush!
@timuss (474)
• India
13 Dec 06
well marriage is not only about helping each other financially and ofcourse not for carnal desire.
its about faith,trust a bonding which let you to understand wht spouse wants from u
i know it may be possible that u start getting attract or even start liking some other woman after marriage but u must remind yourself that it may look cool to hv gf beside wife but its ethically wrong.
and the thing which is ethically wrong is indeed wrong for me
