Fighting Infront of your Kids

@Jshean20 (14362)
Canada
December 15, 2006 8:08pm CST
Do you ever catch yourself fighting infront of your kids or do you know of people who do it? Well according to a guest on the Doctor Phil show, you can feel the affects of watching your parents fight even later on in life. Here are some of the effects she still feels today: being clingy insecurity low self-esteem a lack of belonging, feeling lost guilt and shame no impulse control feelings of helplessness exhibiting aggressive behavior themselves yelling at their own kids feeling fearful, unsure of the future embarrassed to bring friends over What about you? Do you feel these things today and if so, could it be a result of witnessing your parents fight as a kid?? Which effects do you experience the most?
9 people like this
67 responses
16 Dec 06
Fighting in front of the kids is not a good idea. Even fighting without the Kids is not really the thing to do. If differences of opinion should be sorted out with discussion even heated is better than fighting.
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
thank you
@register (1065)
• India
16 Dec 06
i agree .. parents must not fight in front of the kids . Try this video http://www.metacafe.com/watch/338104/children_see_children_do/
@rms2727 (815)
• India
16 Dec 06
i have seen my parents fight like crazy and of the symtoms you have mentioned here nearly 90% can be seen in my personality. whenever i have kids i dont want to do the same and destroy their menul growth.
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
19 Dec 06
thank you
@nhtpscd (1418)
• Australia
16 Dec 06
I have to agree I watched my parents fight over and over so I swor then if I ever had children I wouldn't do it. My ex used to bait me into verbal conflicts but i didn't bit till the kids weren't present. Yes i still remember vividly some of the fights which happened in 1974 to this day. So my advice would be don't
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
19 Dec 06
thank you
• India
16 Dec 06
well... i guess those paernts who fight infront of their kids are quite irreposible...they don knw wht they shud do and wht they shud not to make their kids' childhood healthy and strong .
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
18 Dec 06
thanks
• India
16 Dec 06
yeh the kids or kid r very strange that time look like fearing or still to what to do
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
18 Dec 06
thanks
• India
16 Dec 06
my parents do fight but not dat often
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
18 Dec 06
thanks
@vanities (11410)
• Davao, Philippines
16 Dec 06
luckily i was not able to see them fighting,,maybe because my father was not in our house all the time his working abroad..since i was born...
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
17 Dec 06
thank you
@shob2201 (620)
• India
16 Dec 06
Well fighting in front of your kids can be very bad for their mental state. Kids always wish to see their parents happy together.
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
17 Dec 06
thank you
• India
16 Dec 06
child - its too bad to fight no?
HEY,its very bad to fight in front of children because they will learn all the things from us and if you do the right things they will learn and you do the bad things they will learn the same.plz avoid this.
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
17 Dec 06
thank you
• India
16 Dec 06
my parents never fought in frnt of me and we never fight in front of the children. i know my co-sister who fight in front of the kids and have have set up a bad example.the childern are also uncontrollable now they don't listen to the parents.and back answer them.
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
thank you
@tsuresh01 (821)
• India
16 Dec 06
its really horrible that to fight before the kids.. because that will make the kids to think somewat bad.. in thier mind and to in their future.. and ya sure in future they used to follow the same thing... and i just experience.. that my friend.. was in a good family but the parents are always fighting.. and now he was not in a good charater without.. giving him a pure love.. and now he is somewat returning to his normal life.. because of our friends love..
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
thank you
@1986ankush (1241)
• India
16 Dec 06
according to me fighting in front of kids make bad effect on their nature
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
thank you
• Philippines
16 Dec 06
yes, i feel these feelings even right now that i already have my own child. it's very right, it always reminds me of my parents' quarrells and fights. i hate it!
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
thank you
@beverly1 (1129)
• United States
16 Dec 06
i know alot of people who firght around there kids. my mom and dad used to fight in font of us too sometime. its happen in most family over something stupt.
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
thanks
@Foxxee (3653)
• United States
16 Dec 06
My parents had fights infront of me and my sisters when we were kids, but I don't have any of the above. I also have two kids and if my and my spouse are having problems, he is to leave and walk it out. I never fight with him infront of the kids. We have told eachother shut up once infront of my daughter and never again will that happen because she later told me to shut up when I asked her to pick up some toys. They learn fast.
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
they sure do!
@worthy (2413)
• India
16 Dec 06
I experience feeling of helplessness and feelings of fear and insecure future.
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
thanks
@ash6666 (819)
• India
16 Dec 06
isnt it? - isnt it?
there should nt be any quarrel between wife and husband infront of children.it will definelt influence their minds and will definetly spoiil their future
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
thank you
• Singapore
16 Dec 06
my parents dont really fight a lot when im growing up, they are a very loving couple..maybe some arguments occasionally. both me and my bf think that it's not healthy to fight in front of the children, that's why we've an understanding that when we have our own children next time, never ever to quarrel in front of them.
@Jshean20 (14362)
• Canada
16 Dec 06
thank you
• Philippines
19 Dec 06
parents fighting infront of their children is a bad practice, cause the children will be highly affected emotionally as they love both of their parents.. seeing them fighting will immediately open him up for an early understanding of violence in the world.. he may follow the things that his parents have done, and that is not a good thing.. if parents can afford to solve their problems without fighting, then they might as well fight away from their children as to prevent a nasty show that young kids shouldn't see at a very young age...
• United States
18 Dec 06
I do think that it's only natural to once in a while fight in front of the kids. For the most part, even when you send them away (up to their rooms, etc.) if it's a real knock down drag out kinda fight where you lose your temper too much they're gonna hear it anyways. Personally, I think that kids should know that couples argue, not fight and definitely nothing physical, but I think it shows them that it's a healthy thing and everyone does it. Imagine them growing up thinking that they're wrong because they fight with their significant other! They belittle themselves thinking "Well mom and dad never fought". So I think some degree of arguing is good... just not the really heavy duty stuff where words that shouldn't be said to each other somehow fly out! lol