If raped/molested as child, did you tell anyone?
By sylviekitty
@sylviekitty (2083)
United States
December 16, 2006 8:18am CST
I was molested when I was a little girl, by some boys (around my age and older) that lived on my block. I never told my parents (until I was much older), because I pretty much guessed their reactions. My dad would want to find the guys (one in particular) and kill them. My mom would pretty much call me a liar. It wasn't until my entire family ended up in group counseling that I decided to break my silence (although my sister already knew). I had it written down to make it easier (so I wouldn't have to look anybody in the eye), and I could hear my sister cry, I could see my dad get pissed, and see that my mom seemed indifferent. One of the counselors asked what she had to say about it, and she said nothing. I went on to individual counseling (which I don't think helped any), but I think finally getting it out made it easier to talk about. It's not such a dirty little secret.
Unfortunately, things like this happen all the time. And when people don't tell, it can lead to other kids being hurt. (I found out from my sister that the older guy had raped somebody and that she was supposed to testify against him, but she couldn't go through with it. I didn't live anywhere near there at the time, but you know I wish I could have been of some support to get this guy off the streets).
2 people like this
27 responses
@reeseyj (906)
• United States
17 Dec 06
This happened to me when I was 5. My body shut down and I ended up in the hospital when I could no longer walk. Now I have a chemical imbalance because of it. When it happened I told the next day and I don't think its the molestation that got me sick it was the way people treated me.
@sylviekitty (2083)
• United States
17 Dec 06
I'm so sorry. This is really a scary thing to have happen at any age, but especially when you're little. And to have people treat you in any way OTHER than with understanding and compassion would be disgraceful. I'm sorry you went through that.
@TigerPower (84)
• United States
3 Nov 07
I think it is terrible how the victims always get put on trial. We get treated like we did something wrong half the time. What people don't realize is...We did nothing wrong, wrong was done to us.
This makes me so made and especially when someone questions why we didn't speak out earlier...It's because of how we get treated. It's abuse all over again.
@mummy2jake (399)
• Australia
17 Dec 06
i was & as a result i was a pretty depressed teenager.BUT i did councilling & yes it helped me alot. I went to the police, made a statemtnt did the whole court process, had to testify 3 times & there was a hung jury(they couldn't agree on a verdict) & although he wasn't convicted i was happy, coz i faced him, i ade sure he knew i knew what he did was wrong & i wasn't going to let it overpower my life. Facing him did so much for me 7 i don't regret going to the police for even a second!!!
1 person likes this
@sylviekitty (2083)
• United States
17 Dec 06
I agree- congrats to you for testifying against this person. You are very brave!! You have more courage than I ever had. :)
1 person likes this
@mytwo_daughters (2663)
• United States
17 Dec 06
personally, I think your mom should be shot! what is wrong with her, and if you ask me she is the one who needs counseling! I'm sorry that happened to you. Why wouldn't your mom believe you, or be indifferent. If you ever want to talk you can email me if you like. I'm not that much older than you, although old. I've never been molested or raped, but I'm a great listener.
@Shaun72 (15959)
• Palatka, Florida
17 Dec 06
I was and I held it in and blamed myself. I was 6 my older cousin did it to me. I told friends but my parents later found out and when I became a adult I went to a conseler because I blamed myself for it and I learned that it wasn't my fault at all eventually.my cousin told me don't dare tell your dad he will kill me and then I might have to kill you.That is how my dad found out I had written it down and he thought it had just happened and he was mad untill I explained I wasn't sure what I was doing at 6.
@sylviekitty (2083)
• United States
17 Dec 06
Unfortunately it's easy to blame yourself, because it's you're being molested, and it's happening more than once, part of you wonders if you asked for it, or if you somehow deserve it. You may wonder if part of you likes it, or else you could get the courage to stop it. But when you're young like that, you don't really know what is going on. And these older people are supposed to be protecting us, not hurting us. They're taking advantage of our young age, our confusion, and the fact that in some way we just want to please people to keep them from being angry and hurting us more.
I'm sorry that happened to you.
@nevsaynev131420 (44)
• China
17 Dec 06
forget about it,maybe the best thing you should do is to forget about it,
@sylviekitty (2083)
• United States
17 Dec 06
to the other person commenting on this- Why is forgetting about it a good thing to do? It's not like it's something this person is ever going to forget what happened to her. This kind of thing affects you for the rest of your life, often in ways you don't even know about. You don't have to ever bring it up, but if she brings it up, be willing to listen. :)
1 person likes this
@jade01 (803)
• Australia
17 Dec 06
I was raped as a teen the only person i told was my mother she wanted me to go to the police but i couldnt I was embaressed i dont know why .
I seen the same guy a couple of years ago and instantly i thought to myself i should have gone to the cops because now i wonder howmany more lives he has destroyed.
I know I will never be the same girl that I once was.
@lossforredwords (3620)
• Philippines
17 Dec 06
thank god i never had that experience. if that happens to me , i dont know what i will going to do, it takes alot of courage to reveal that you are molested or raped cause that wuould mean a lot of embarassment and emotional strength.
i hope yo could get over that completely.
@198112 (335)
• United States
17 Dec 06
My first cousin attempted to molest me one day when he slept over my house one night. The next day morning soon as he walked out the door I immediately told my family. When they thought he was home they called a confronted him and my aunt. He denied it and to my surprise my family suddenly didn't believe me but they believed him.
That really brought down my trust I had for the people that claimed they love and care for me.
Millions of children is in this same situation or worst everyday. I just hope they get the help they need. Its a horrible thing when a child is violated.
@sylviekitty (2083)
• United States
17 Dec 06
It's hard to believe that somebody you love (as your family no doubt loves your cousin) has done something inappropriate to another person. It's very sad, but when two family members are now in this situation, it can split up the family. It shouldn't, but it does. I'm just sorry that nobody believed you enough to confront him- at least that you know of. It's quite possible that somebody isn't at all surprised he would be accused of such a thing. And it wouldn't be surprising if he tries something like that again in the future.
@gaganjodhani (1)
• India
17 Dec 06
i wasn't molested but i think it should be told to someone who is very close to you. By sharing your sorrows with someone will ease the pain.
@workinghard (165)
• India
10 Jan 07
Yes first you must tell your partents
because you know that partents only help
us in this way.
@justvenkys (1357)
• India
17 Dec 06
oh, i wouldn't have told anyone because we dont know the meaning of thing at that age.
@dradelelassy (1208)
• United States
17 Dec 06
i think ,better for raped girl to talk about it,because it helps her to be cured of psychlogical trauma and also to catch the guilty criminal
@MESUSHANT (196)
• India
17 Dec 06
This is the most genuine problem in any place of world. The solution of this problem is to speak out.
@VintageBrian (21)
• United States
17 Dec 06
its hard for a child to come out in the open with something like this, but in most cases, especially with all the molesters and rapes going on today, anyone would have to be taking seriouly.. hopefully stopping the cycle
