December 16, 2006 2:26pm CST
TELEGRAM #1 A daughter sends a telegram to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams, which the father receives as: "father, your daughter has been successful in BED." ************ *** TELEGRAM #2 A husband, while he is on a business trip to a hill station sends a telegram to his wife: "I wish you were here." The message received by wife: "I wish you were her." ************ *** TELEGRAM #3 A wife with near maturing pregnan! cy goes to railway station to return to her husband. At the reservation counter, while her turn came, it was the last ticket. Taking pity on a very old lady next to her in the queue, she offered her berth to the old lady and sent a telegram to her husband which reached as: "Shall be coming tomorrow, heavy rush in the train, gave birth to an old lady." ************ *** TELEGRAM #4 A man wants to celebrate his wife's Birthday by throwing a party. So he goes to order a birthday cake. The salesman asks him what message he wants to put on the cake. Well he thinks for a while and says: Let's put, "you are not getting older you are getting better". The salesman asks, "How do you want me to put it?" The man says, Well put "You are not getting older", at the top and "! You are getting better" at the bottom. The real fun didn't start until the cake was opened the entire party watched the message decorated on the cake: "You are not getting older at the top, you are getting better at the bottom". ************ *** TELEGRAM #5 A man from Agra went to Ajmer . His wife was in her parent's house in Delhi . When the man went to Ajmer , he asked his servant to send a telegram to his wife indicating about his trip to Ajmer . He sent a telegram. When the wife received the telegram, she fainted. It was written: 'Sethji aaj mar ! gaye! (Sethji Ajmer gaye )
28 Dec 06
A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all of us eat it. Can anyone here tell me what lethal product I'm referring to? You, sir, in the first row, please give us your idea." The man lowered his head and said, "Wedding cake."
27 Dec 06
Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever. The guy replies: Thanks for the warning. hahahahaha ********** A wife asked her husband: "What do you like most in me my pretty face or my sexy body?" He looked at her from head to toe and replied: "I like your sense of humor.