holidays with someone suffering from dementia

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My mother has dementia. She was a very intelligent, tkae charge type of person who had a great memory for details. Now she can't retain any information from minute to minute. Unfortunately, she thinks it's everyone else who has the problem. It makes the upcoming holiday more of a chore than a celebration. How can one deal with someone who shouts obscenities and threatens those she feels are slighting her? The grandchildren and great grand children stay far away while the children try hard to avoid confrontation. My father and his sister also live with her; they have no memory problems and are coping as best they can, but it is difficult. With myself and two sibling living with them, she is never alone in the house, but she's frequently alone in a room. I'm really not looking forward to this family gathering and have no idea what to do to make it less stressful.