Should I Go or Not?
By nicelyrom
@nicelyrom (521)
Philippines
December 28, 2006 12:32am CST
My first love and ex-boyfriend wants to go out for a date with me. He's inviting me for dinner and wants to watch a movie with me. I am still single and so is he. Should I go or not? I'm afraid to go because I don't wanna expect more than friendship and be hurt again, but there's something in me that pushes me to meet him.
4 people like this
13 responses
@jtsellen (25)
• United States
28 Dec 06
If you want to put yourself in a situation where things might head down the path that you are trying to avoid then the answer or advice would be no. My past experiences with ex-girlfriends have been tough. I have been that guy that tried to take a friendly approach with a former flame, only to get burned or be the one doing the burning for some sort of sick emotional revenge.There are a ton of dudes out there that maypotentially have what you want, a friendship. You have history with this guy, so does history repeat itself in your life. Be cautious, make the right decisions if you go through with anything. Maintain control of the situation. It will eventually draw out his true intentions.
2 people like this
@nicelyrom (521)
• Philippines
28 Dec 06
i think you're right. i better choose not to go. According to Bertrand Russel, why repeat the old errors if there are so many new errors to commit? i've been there with him and got hurt, so why choose to be hurt again, right? thanks for your advice.
1 person likes this
@puma_nz (999)
• New Zealand
28 Dec 06
Thats all it is isnt it? Or are you afraid that it may lead to more?? If you still have feelings for him it may get a little upsetting cos those "Butterflies in ya guts" are gonna be fluttering hardout! to a point where you cant control yourself. Have fun anyway if you do go.. just be a bit careful.. be assertive and stand your ground.
1 person likes this
@nicelyrom (521)
• Philippines
28 Dec 06
im surprised you got me! yes, im afraid that this meeting of ours would lead to something more intimate. you know, i can't estimate myself if i can control myself upon seeing him, upon being with him. i know myself, and ifever i still love him, i dont know where this meeting would go. Where do I stand?
1 person likes this
@puma_nz (999)
• New Zealand
28 Dec 06
You know in your own mind what he will do. You know what will happen if it does go further. Those feelings you have are "Real" and by the sounds of things, He will hurt them, then he will do it again because he knows how vulnerable you are. I have been down this road before and I have been badly burnt. I learnt a HUGE lesson. I just want to spare you from more Heartache thats all.. :) If you are strong enough, You'd say "No".. but your Heart will tell you different. Its entirely up to you.. only YOU can make the decision.
1 person likes this
@tarheelnancy (1317)
• United States
28 Dec 06
I think you should really think about it before you decide. What is the reason why he is now your ex? If you do decide to go, take it slow and don't expect things to pick up where they left off.
@nicelyrom (521)
• Philippines
28 Dec 06
you're correct! he's now my past, and the past is history. the reason why we broke up before is his irresponsibility. and i think this is not the right time to babysit a man who has a peter pan syndrome.
1 person likes this
@nicelyrom (521)
• Philippines
3 Jan 07
thanks for your advice. im still thinking if i should go. he said he's gonna treat me to Spiderman 3.
@nicelyrom (521)
• Philippines
3 Jan 07
oooppsss... i was wrong. it's not spiderman 3. it's another movie. Another ex invited me to Spiderman 3 but not my first love. hehehe.
@Stephanie5 (2946)
• United States
28 Dec 06
It shouldn't hurt to just go on a date, unless he was abusive or something like that. Just tell him how you honestly feel from the get-go so he can't be left to wonder. Maybe you guys will hit it off, maybe you won't. Maybe you can just end up being great friends!
I wish you the best of luck!
1 person likes this
@adarshgirish (247)
• India
28 Dec 06
i think you should trust your heart .. if you know him really well and if your heart tells u to give him a second chance then you should go ahead
1 person likes this
@nicelyrom (521)
• Philippines
28 Dec 06
im willing to give him another chance as he still has a special part in my heart but im scared of what will happen... im scared to know that all he feels for me is physical attraction...
@tildy12 (760)
• United States
29 Jan 07
I think you should go out on the date with him cause a date could never hurt.
@bonnielass (484)
• United States
2 Jan 07
Go out do not expect anything. Just go and have fun. If it ends up just friends there is nothing wrong with to many friends.
@nicelyrom (521)
• Philippines
3 Jan 07
thank you for your comment. yes, i wont expect more than friendship. i wont allow him to take advantage of my weaknesses and of my being a woman. friendship is all i want to regain and not our love affair.
@jenbatres (799)
• United States
2 Jan 07
Go out but keep in mind your friends only. If you get the impression he wants more or if you want more -- talk don't assume.
@nicelyrom (521)
• Philippines
3 Jan 07
thanks. that's a good advice. i wont expect more. promise. hehehe.
@boyfriend2k4 (398)
• Australia
26 Mar 07
If you dont wanna be with him again as a girlfriend then dont go, trust me you wont be able to move on
