Can a man and woman really be friends?

United States
January 8, 2007 11:49am CST
The hollywood movie 'When Harry met Sally' is a verbalization of the fact that there is no such thing a platonic realtion between a man and a woman. Dictionary explains platonic love as an affectionate, non-physical realtionship between two people of opposite sexes. But does it really exists? From my peronal experiences too, I have come to the realization of the fact that such relationships rearely exists. Would like to know your thoughts on this.
10 people like this
94 responses
• Australia
8 Jan 07
I believe that friendship is the very first pre-requisite to marriage. How could anyone even think about a lifetime union if they weren't friends first? I also believe that once married, and therefore totally committed to one person for life, a true friendship with men is possible for women. I have a very real friendship with a couple of men and there is not the slightest inkling of anything but friendship, mutual respect, and just being there for each other. I guess it all depends on the make-up of the person and their values. If a person values the most important things in life, she is not going to be influenced by things which would harm or destroy those values.
@SplitZip (1490)
• Portugal
8 Jan 07
They can be friends if they totally repulse each other! ;)
1 person likes this
@shywolf (4519)
• United States
8 Jan 07
I do believe that for some people it may be possible. For myself, most likely not. I am too entranced with the idea of romantic love not to have some thoughts about someone who I would get along with well enough to be true friends with. I would think that almost any male friend that I would have, I would hold at least some tiny attraction to.
1 person likes this
@tocika (970)
• Romania
8 Jan 07
I couln't have boys like only friends because all see in me girl but not a friend.I don't like that so,for me doesn't work that with man and women friends and I have a boyfriend and I want to have only this relationship,not others. Have a nice day!
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Jan 07
I agree with you that platonic relationships rarely exist. I have had several male friends and the problem seems to be that after a while either one or the other misinterpret signals or grow so close that they mistake feelings of friendship for love. Unfortunately, this can cause a rift in a wonderful friendship. Not to say that platonic relationships do not exist, but I believe that they are a rarity, which is a shame as some of my best friendships have been with men.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Jan 07
Men only are friend with women for one reason; they want more from the relationship. How long they stay friends with any cetain woman, is simply a testament to how badly they WANT said relationship.
• Philippines
8 Jan 07
yeah i believe on that theres no such thing as a platonic love that is impossible so so impossible
1 person likes this
@AskAlly (3627)
• Canada
8 Jan 07
I have had my "man" friend since I was 6 years old and he was 9. We walked to school together, he looked out for me on the playground. We always went to the same school so we seemed to stay friends. We would double date, but not each other. I'd talk to him about boys, he talked to me about girls We both got married and not to eachother. We never even exchanged a kiss We are still friends to this day.
1 person likes this
@Marie2473 (8517)
• Sweden
8 Jan 07
I have ALOT of male friends and one of my best friend is a man. There has NEVER been that kid of love or attraction between us so YES I do belivethat men and women can be friends!
1 person likes this
@kefkaix (33)
• United States
8 Jan 07
Its perfectly realistical to have friends who are female if you are a guy and have them be nothing more than friends. I have a bunch of friends who are girls who I could care less about "getting in thier pants" as someone put it. It all just depends on your personality, sometimes you can get along with people really well but you just know that you would be horrible lovers, besides I love my girlfriend anyways.
1 person likes this
@vkbllm (474)
• India
8 Jan 07
Hi dude.... Yes there are such relations, really platonic relations do exists. I am in such a relation, A Girl of my age 20. She is very nice, I dont love her but I respect her a lot, I cant think of having physical inmacy with her becoz of my respect to her, really.
• India
8 Jan 07
I think you a true friend is someone who is there for you and you can go to when you need something or soemone. I think you can make great friends online. They are probably much like chidlrens friendships- innocent and naive.think that friendships develop no matter what the circumstances. Over the internet things like age, social stature, culture, looks, and so forth become irrelevant....you can make true friends even though its online, friendship has no gaps and boundaries, just have faith to your friend and everything will be fine..... Sure it is possible to have true friendship with someone on line. I think it is a different kind of friendship then someone you know face to face but I have a few friends on line that know things about me that some friends in real life do not know.... noticed that its much more easyer too speak too my online friend,then my other friend that lives near me..
1 person likes this
@tbomb2002 (269)
• United States
8 Jan 07
My fiance and I have had this discussion many times. When we first started dating, I had more friends that were guys then girls. He told me that the guys who were my friends were only around because they were hoping to be more then a friend. He said once the guys learned that I was in a serious relationship with someone, they would soon fade away as a friend. While he was right for most of the guys, there were still a handful that seemed perfectly fine to remain my friend even if they didn't stand a chance at getting in my pants! I do think though that once the line is crossed, once you sleep with one of them, that's the end of the friendship.
@sarkar1 (336)
• India
8 Jan 07
Ofcourse they can be friends.........I myself have dozens of friends who are girls, many of them are not good looking and even those who are ,i feel no attraction.....its just that I like their company and they are very nice people. The film "Harry met Sally" showcases a paricular view point; it is not necessary that everybody will have the same view point.
@Liasonfan (1702)
• Canada
9 Jan 07
I have many male friends and have been happily married for years. Of course hubby knows all my friends and most are his friends too as I know all his female friends. It is important to know yourself, your relationships and always keep the lines of communications open, so there are no secrets and no causes for worry or jealousy...Trust is also important and a huge issue, without it, there is no relationship, anywhere really...
• India
9 Jan 07
Yes, definately man and women really can be friends. Now in such a modern world, there should be no difference between the man and women. Nowadays they both are working in the same office and in the same cabin. There should be no such point of view of difference between them.
• Philippines
9 Jan 07
they can be...i prefer boys over men..they're more discreet as compared to girls.
• India
9 Jan 07
There is nothing like love.ok When we like someone ,we just want more with her.
• India
9 Jan 07
Yes why not men and women can be frnds infact very good frnds without any non-physical relationship. I have many frnds who are men and even some have wives and are enjoying their married life without any misunderstandings. I still keep in touch with my school frnds and plan trips with them and enjoy a lot. But in some families it is considered that befriending men is sometimes bad as they indulge in physical relationships some way or the other. In my opinion i think as long as we are in limits and respect each others views men and women can be frnds forever.
• Hong Kong
9 Jan 07
I think this kind of relationship may exist. After all love is not a inevitable proudct whe a man and a woman stay together. Sometimes you may feel good to stay with a girl,but it is not the so called love. it is just a sense to wanna be good friends, shareing our opinions or do someting together. I do have had this experiences. I have several good feamale friends, but not lover,just friends like the male friends. I can't express the feeling clearly,and I only know we believe in each other, and also we all have no feelings of that kind of love.
• India
9 Jan 07
ya man.there male and female.but we dont have male soul and female soul.