Self pity: How do you help and encourage a friend who is having his problem?

self pity is different with humble, so i think self pity is bad, it would make the person become apatis, lack of confidence, lack of creativity, and highly depend on others. What i ussualy do is that i praise my friends, give them motivational / inspiring quote, show them about their talents / gift / things to be thanks to the God, and supporting them with words & action. i enroll them to see that God have purpose on every things that He create, and if my friend is an atheist, then ussualy just logic explanation will do motivate them and regain their self esteem.