Emotional Choices....

United States
January 13, 2007 6:09pm CST
It is a mistake to think that one must choose between love or money. Feeling that you wish to build a life with someone has to include considerations for the quality of life one will enjoy, or despair of, before the decision can be made. There should never be a separation of enjoyment, and work. Everyone has the right to enjoy their livelihood. Have you noticed that when people ask your reasons for doing what ever it is you do to make money, that those who ask whether you enjoy it OR if you just think of it as work, are trying to figure out how to gain an advantage over you? Do you ever stop them to chastize them for trying to find a way to appeal to your enjoyment so that they can justify not paying you with that "well if you enjoy it you shouldn't have to get paid for it" line of misguided logic?
6 people like this
21 responses
@kathy77 (7487)
• Australia
14 Jan 07
yes it is a mistake to choose between love and money as money cannot bring you love, and love once you find true love it can never be replaced with any money, and yes it is a mind of misguidance.
2 people like this
@magusto (561)
• Portugal
14 Jan 07
you are right. there never should be a separation of enjoy and work.
2 people like this
@polachicago (19073)
• United States
14 Jan 07
I couldn't agree with you more. I do what I love to do and I get paid for it. Many friends (and my friend's friends and relatives) think that because I love what I do, they can ask for small favorite. Sometimes that favorite cost me not only my time, but also traveling expenses. For the same time I can get paid a lot, but...they don't see it. I learn to be buisy for some people who are taking advantage of my enjoyment. Totally misguided logic.
1 person likes this
• Nigeria
14 Jan 07
I also share the same view as you do
@Julia1970 (410)
• United States
15 Jan 07
You are talking about the same kind of people who feel the need to ask an obese woman when her baby is due thinking that they are politely pointing out she is overweight. Some people are just flat out stupid! It is one of the biggest blessings in life to be able to do waht you love and get paid for it. We do not live in a futurist star-treky existance where there are no bills. People have rent or mortgages and they do not pay themselves! Do you think the person who said if you love it you should do it for free would do their job for free? I think NOT. Good topic!
• United States
15 Jan 07
I agree that you don't truly have to choose between love and money. You can obtain both if you desire! Money isn't everything in life for sure.
1 person likes this
@Kayzzaman (173)
• India
14 Jan 07
Money matters but does not matter above everything else specially emotional wealth. Love is a beautiful thing for everyone. It is inspiring and leading light of life. Without it, moneymatter cannot save the grace of life. Love and all other emotional welths are the best of the best wealth, moneymatter cannot overtake them in whatever way it tries to save us. Man is an emotional animal cherishing all forms of emotions in glorious manner. For emotion's sake man can die and for emotion's sake man can live up to human reputation justifying his meaningful objective of life Money is just a thing like scores of things - these things just suupportive elements for life, nothing less or nothing more.
@Celanith (2334)
• United States
14 Jan 07
No one should not have to choose between love and money, and yes you should enjoy life without having your work brought into it all the time. You need to achieve a balance, True love that is genuine and lasting finds a way, even if there is not a lot of money. People committed to staying togather and who truly love one another find ways to stay with one another and to survive even if there is a lack of money. Much of what people think they need is actually just want or lust. Hardship and hardtimes befall all of us sooner or later, to allow such to destroy your relationship is foolish. You should sit and evaluate what you can live without and make the financial adjustments accordingly. I know from personal experince of 37 years of marriage this is true. I have lived literally homeless with my husband and four children for three months, thankfully it was summer time and we had a tent and could camp. We literally ate from dumpsters. We made do and we only had $559.00 so we used $150 for camping space, and gas and oil for our car and we used $100 for buying food and got the rest from dumpsters, We paid $50 for storage unit. The rest we saved until we could get a house and my husband found a job finally a month before we got the house and then we got the house and moved into it and got our things our of storage. We also fished for food in the streams and looked for edible wild foods, berries and mushrooms and dandilion greens. This was 30 years ago. We made do and we did without.
@camille101 (1027)
• United Arab Emirates
14 Jan 07
Oftentimes, enjoyment over work is something that you can't have on a one night stand basis. It is building over time you spent & do your work. Mostly people, just don't realize it, or take it for granted. Through work, we meet friends, lovers and comrades. We interact more socially. But as I said, lots of us don't realize these things. We feel that we are prisoners of our work, and oftentimes want to be free from it. But reality checks in, when we lose it. Because that's the time for us to either feel freed or feel regretful.
1 person likes this
@akumei1269 (1749)
• India
14 Jan 07
I think one should take the job religiously honestly till one is in it . Because , it is one's livlihood . If one sees it in that light , one will find reason for enjoying it . Then there will be little scope of looking at it critically . And in present unemployment situation this attitude is better than a synical view on the basis of it paying low. However one always should look for better opportunity so that more income is had which will make life more enjoyable . Money and enjoyment goes hand in hand to a certain extent .
1 person likes this
• Romania
14 Jan 07
yes... for many people.. money are the most important thing... more important than the love or even their happiness..
1 person likes this
• United States
14 Jan 07
SageMother, i'm hearing two questions, or feeling there are two responses/ First, building a life with someone will always involve finances and career choices, so i don't see how love and money can be separated. Second, people that want you to work for free, or want you to be subservient, want you to be a second-class citizen, as in the caste system. Avoid it like the plague.
1 person likes this
@shywolf (4519)
• United States
14 Jan 07
I wish that more people had jobs that they truly loved. I myself don't really wish to work at a regular job until and unless I can find a line of work where I would at least be content, even if not overjoyed to go to work each day. I don't feel that what you were saying about people trying to gain a hold over you by asking if you enjoy your job is always true, though. Perhaps if your boss was asking you that question, or someone else at your workplace. But I had never thought of it that way. I usually think that people ask you if you enjoy your line of work because they are genuinely curious, especially sicne it seems like so many people take jobs where they are not entirely happy because they need the money.
1 person likes this
@sigma77 (5384)
• United States
14 Jan 07
If I work at a job, I want to like doing it. I want to be paid for it also. If I do it very well, then I expect to get paid well. Why not have love and money? I feel you can build a life with someone, have as much money as you want, and be in love with the other person as much as you want. Both are unlimited possibilities. Why would I want to work at something I do not love doing? Is it only for money? I would not work at a job only for money. Maybe others are jealous of you working at a job you love. I ask myself why choose love or money when you can have them both?
1 person likes this
@flordz (269)
• Philippines
14 Jan 07
be practical, if you are badly in need then you know what to choose, survival of the fittest is the trend nowadays, reality slowly fades the true needs and want of a human being, that is supposed to be love.
1 person likes this
• India
14 Jan 07
Money and Love both are the opposite things, one can get either of them at once only or by luck. Everyone must have strive for gaining money or love it can't be thrown up or got as gift to each of us. So needs a complete judgement and discussions in the brain to gain both of the things in place or in pockets that will enable to have smile and make the person on right track. In case of wrong or misguided logic the person who follows has to suffer and not one who follows could be said as blind of mind that never detects any of facts. Its the concerning factor which will end his/her life in minutes and outsiders couldnot stop.
1 person likes this
@anne_143god (5388)
• Philippines
14 Jan 07
I dont think so it is right to say that people is considering the life that they will have if they choose that person. I guess it does not apply to all but I agree that most people do their job because they enjoy doing that job.
@Aussies2007 (5339)
• Australia
14 Jan 07
It is not a mistake to think that you have to choose between love and money. It is a reality. There is actually a very fine balance between the two. Half of the divorces occur because of a lack of money and the other half because they focuse too much on money. Two people very much in love can see that love evaporate if one spouse works 12 hours a day 6 days a week... while the other don't work or only works 8 hours a day 5 days a week. Love is about communication. And if you are never home and only come there to sleep a few hours every night... you don't have a relationship. You need to find the right balance. If you want money... don't have any kids. They will cost you more than your house. We all have to make choices because we cannot have it all. As for enjoying your work... only those who do enjoy their work... succeed in life. You cannot do something that you hate for 40 years and expect to be a success. You will stagnate all your life... feeling sorry for yourself. Why do you care about some jealous idiot who reckon you should not be paid because you enjoy your work? I would not give them the time of the day if I was you. Don't associate yourself with people trying to pull you down.
1 person likes this
@Capndon (337)
• India
14 Jan 07
How true There are some things in life that you can never choose between. It is during those times when you must choose that you wish life was easier. But generally intuition does get us through that situation I guess :)
• Indonesia
14 Jan 07
i agree with you, there should never be a separation of enjoyment and work, but often in many cases, especially things that happends in middle-low class in developed country like indonesia, we don't have choice. Simply because the lack of knowledge, capital, or the systems ... for those who ask wether im enjoying my work or not and try to gain advantage over me because of that, then i'll just simply give examples about tiger woods, golf professional player that being paid well because of his hobby, and also oprah ... so ... i agree that "person shouldn't have to get paid if they enjoy their job" is a misguided logic ...
1 person likes this
@imakella (665)
• United States
14 Jan 07
i'm very emotion when my mom advices me to work for the home needs.. are u ?