Can friendship come after love?

Philippines
January 16, 2007 8:54pm CST
After the love has gone and the romance has fizzled, can ex-lovers really build true friendship? Or is it really over when it's over?
3 people like this
30 responses
@swasti (1157)
• India
17 Jan 07
i dont know about it inhe suituation u say . but my husband and i are more like friends. we dont have much attraction as a bed-mates. but we make good friends to share our thoughts, our needs. basically we r more like friends then husband and wife. and we enjoy bein g in such a realatioship.
@swasti (1157)
• India
17 Jan 07
hahahaa!!! defenitely not. we r very loyal to each other. we r not attracted does not mean that we never go with it. it jsu means we r not crazy like other couples. we both give more importance to feelings and more other enjoyments like making lots of touring.
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
oh i get it now! i though you guys separated. i agree, friendship should always exist ESPECIALLY between married couples.
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
that's good for you :) if you don't mind me asking, do both of you now have new partners?
1 person likes this
@biwasaki (1745)
• United States
17 Jan 07
I think that it would be hard to stay friends after being lovers. There would always be the underlying "what if" thoughts. And staying attached to an ex would make it hard to meet new people. How many men/women out there would want to jump into a relationship with someone who still has contact with their ex?
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
Not a lot, I must say. Being civil will have to do, I guess?
@opinder (420)
• India
17 Jan 07
I agree. It puts you into an odd situation and you never feel completely free.
@babray06 (1787)
• India
17 Jan 07
It's very difficult. Because I believe a relationship just can't be build it's just develop over the time. If the ex-lovers still feel for each other and don't wan't to leave the other and wish the very best to the other one then only there is a chance of such relationship to be developed over a substantial time period. It's not impossible but it is truly difficult. Both have to re-model them to the new prospect.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
so why did they break up if they still love each other?
• India
6 Feb 07
each and every situation is unique, i feel its very hard to become friends once the love has gone, but as the world is changing and pople taking the western culture, people do stay as friends after the love has gone, but i ll tell you its really tough if your love is true
• India
7 Feb 07
well dude its not easy to be friends after being in deep love, it hurts you a lot when you see or talk to them or when you find them with other person, dont you think so?
• Philippines
7 Feb 07
i agree with you here. if the relationship really brought either partner pain, then it would take a big effort to stay friends. nevertheless, if you don't belong to the same community anyway...and your paths don't really cross anymore after the break-up, i don't see any reason why friendship should be aimed.
• Philippines
18 Jan 07
Friendship can come after love, but it will take time. In my case, with my ex-boyfriend, it took us years before we became friends again after the breakup.
• Philippines
6 Feb 07
I guess there's always the possibility but it will be difficult. Congratulations on your newfound friendship with your ex!
@samraf (725)
• India
6 Feb 07
No this is not possible love one's cant become freinds. there is no way of this happening. but freinds can fall in love but in the same time they cant turn back to freinds, because feeling are always there to disturb your relation. one cant bear to be peon after becoming the officer .heh its just the same one cant be become an normal personality for the person for whom he or she was to be the only one left on the earth. so its totally impossible to br freinds after having or dating each other. when its over then belive me its really over . love is the last relationship and after that you can be only strangers. Regards, Sam
• Philippines
7 Feb 07
strangers, eh? love is so odd. one moment you think you want to spend the rest of your life with this person, the next moment you don't even know him anymore.
@pusiket (1756)
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
There are some ex-partners who manage to end up as good friends after the romantic relationship is over. But there are some who prefer to totally ends everything.
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
really? they end up as good friends and not just civil acquaintances? that's great to hear because i think it's very rare.
• Canada
17 Jan 07
I am still friends with my former boyfriend. After my parents lousy divorce, I promised that I would never date someone I'd hate later.
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
i see...are you friends just like before?
@missyd79 (3438)
• United States
17 Jan 07
i have never remained so called friends with my exes...now i tolerate my ex husband because of our son, but we do not hang out and talk on the phone about thingslike i do with my other friends. I just feel that it would be uncomfortable situation with your current lover. I almost left my current boyfriend because he was still talking to his ex fiance because i was insecure that he would decide to get back together with her, i just did not understand why he would still want to talk to her after everything that she did to him.
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
so there's really no point in staying friends, eh? especially if you have to take into consideration the feelings of your new partner.
@shineison (874)
• Uganda
9 Feb 07
Yes it can be happened. but it does not mean that two friends do not love each other. love and friendship may be different, where they can be. I believe that after marriage both Love and Friendship can come in your life. i am sure. 100%
• United States
17 Jan 07
Anything is possible but I guess it would depend on how the relationship ended. I mean if there were trust issues or cheating I don't think you would have anything to build a friendship on.
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
I agree, cheating really tarnishes a relationship. it's very difficult to regain the trust, much more the friendship, after such betrayal.
@tintusam (1168)
• India
7 Feb 07
yeah friendship can often end in love. but one thing for sure is that love can never end in friendship.
@07011987 (70)
• India
17 Jan 07
its a bit tough but it all depends on as tu why did they break up..if either of them has choosen anothe one as there soul mate then it is next to impossible n if the split is due to sum family poblems then yes they can still be friends..the jist is all dependent on as to why they broke....
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
maybe the love is not just enough that's why couples break up?
@LPastor (61)
• United States
17 Jan 07
I dont believe so. I don't think anyone that was in a romantic relationship could EVER have a friendship like 2 people that were never in a relationship. I am friends with my ex (also my first love) and I don't want to be with him and he doesn't want to be with me, but there is also something there between us that I dont think we will ever truly be able to be friends like I am with other people, ya know? I think people should just break their ties with an ex lover once they are done- because it always causes problems with any future relationships- the person always suspecting you and your friend (aka your ex) having something more. I don't really think it is worth it. We can always make new friends.
• Philippines
17 Jan 07
I agree with letting go of the past and burning bridges. It's painful work but you have to do that to really move on with your life.
• India
6 Feb 07
yeah it will i think so and i believe so...
@ayushi (224)
• India
6 Feb 07
well for me its just over when over...no further dealings..it is just a formality then.. there is something i wish to say here...LOVE AFTER FRIENDSHIP IS POSSIBLE BUT FRIENDSHIP AFTER LOVE IS NOT.. well thats the way i think and ehat i have experienced all around me
@kmgupta (561)
• India
6 Feb 07
no love will come after friendship
@nazneen (123)
• India
6 Feb 07
Through friendship,love can be developed. But after love,friendship not possible. It'll be most difficult task for one to keep nice,happy,normal,casual friendship with former lover whom that he/she truly loved for once.
• India
6 Feb 07
Noooooo...... It Wil Never Come.. It Is Nt Tat Easy.. So lovers cant be a frnds....
• Philippines
6 Feb 07
maybe..but it depends..where you are really hurt, i dont think so..like when you were cheated?..maybe it depend on the situation, after realizing both are meant for each other..and defends on a people personalty..