When to give birth after marriage

@nithila30 (1427)
India
January 18, 2007 10:12pm CST
I am single.But i always have dout that is it good to give birth to kids as soon u get married orelse you take time make things settled on ur side and after that u give birth. I have some choices here just discuss that with me. 1.you need to have good understaning between partners .so isit good to have after 2 to 3 years after marriage. 2.Theres nothing to do with understanding and giving birth so y to postponed give birth as soon as u get married. 3.if the economy status is below its too critical to handle a kid .so workhard and make high to maintain ur status and give birth. 4.This must be planned b4 marriage itself whether our ecomony willbe helpful to lead a family and after that only you should get married. So these kindda stuffs run in my mind what do you think about it.Post ur opions and how come you maintain ur family.I hope it will be useful for others also.
8 people like this
59 responses
@rachelcaron (1681)
• United States
19 Jan 07
It really depends on each situation. It is such a personal decision and must be made together with your husband. In my case my husband and I were married about 3 years before our son was born. I thought that was just the right amount of time. We had a lot of time to spend together alone and save up a little bit of money. We got to travel and fix up the house. Having a baby is a lot of work. You have to be mentally ready. It is so worth it though. Every day is a joy.
@nithila30 (1427)
• India
19 Jan 07
Oh thats really nice to hear that you have a planned life.Anytime planned life is good.So that you can be mentally and phyiscally feel free.Have a nice day
1 person likes this
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
And God said... "Go forth and multiply". If you are think you are ready physically, emotionally and financially to bear a child, then go on. its just a matter of right timing.
3 people like this
• China
20 Jan 07
i think one should start having babies after marriage,because the more you wait the weaker and old you become.
@khufara (73)
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
i think its good after 2 or 3 years. then your family would be stable by then. that way you will also enjoy each others company.
3 people like this
• Philippines
20 Jan 07
We should first settle down and be sure that we can really our kids a better future if were going to give birth them..If not, i think we should work first and save much before thinking that stuff to give the a better life.
@ssh123 (31096)
• India
19 Jan 07
People in India look down on woman who gives birth before marriage or immediately after marriage. Generally married womn give birth to baby or or before 9 months after marriage.
2 people like this
@nithila30 (1427)
• India
19 Jan 07
Yeah i know as i am also from india but i just wanted to know whats ur opinion in that
1 person likes this
• India
19 Jan 07
I'm an Indian and my opinion is that a couple should've baby as soon as they get married. I tried in my real life and now we've a 3 month old female kid.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jan 07
We had a baby 7 months after we got married. Not because I was pregnant before we got married but because our son was born 10 weeks early. I wouldn't change the fact that we had kids so soon after we got married. We dated for quite some time before we got married. But for each couple, it is different. Some want and need that time to themselves for a while and others want to have kids as soon as they can!
2 people like this
@korek222 (702)
• Poland
19 Jan 07
Very good for you :) but well 10 weeks earlier is a bit rough - is your child in a good shape cause being born 2,5 moth too early could be harmful :|
1 person likes this
• India
19 Jan 07
It all depends on your socio economic status as you must be aware of. Given the present economic situation i think it'd be better if you get married around 25 and have a kid not later than 28. Since child birth after 30 entails with biological complications of the neonate like chromosomal disorder and psychological issues arise in child rearing practices. It's true that you should weigh your options in regards to your economic status but if you and your partner are quite open to talk out all the issues then you can work towards a better life style whicj helps on the longer run. So it all depends on whom you are marrying. Better discuss all the issues with your would be partner and see whether you both agree on important aspects of life. I guess i have given a plausible answer for the issue u have posted. Let me know if you have anything else on mind let me know. For your information i'm a psychologist by qualification and planning to give pre n post marital counselling to people who r n need of such service. Take care Nithila and all the best.
2 people like this
@msqtech (15226)
• United States
19 Jan 07
I think that you can never have enough resources to have kids just have them and do your best
1 person likes this
@Lydia1901 (16353)
• United States
22 Jan 07
Well, those sound like good ideas. My husband and I knew ourselves for a year before we got married. We had a kid a year later into our marriage. And it is great for three of us.
2 people like this
@degoke63 (37)
• Moldova
20 Jan 07
Dicuss this wth your fiance during courtship so that u can agree on the different issue
2 people like this
@burieks (127)
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
hi! it depends on the couple. but for me, the right time to have children is if they are emotionally, spiritually, physically and financially ready. put in mind also, that some women have difficulty getting pregnant or giving birth if they're old already so you shouldn't take long years before deciding to have a baby.
• India
20 Jan 07
After marriag frist child should after a one year this gives you time to settle with your husband and his family
1 person likes this
@anja31 (708)
• Canada
19 Jan 07
it is up to you. In my opinin if you are married it is nice for being a while with only your husband and the kids will come later, unless you are over 33 years old.
@korek222 (702)
• Poland
19 Jan 07
For me it depends on at what age people wanted to get children. I would like to merry right after the studies (well what is basicly normal at my country ) and well i would like to wait a while till i firnd a proper job and have a decent living since i would like to have a baby. So for me best would be like 4-5 years after marriage to have a baby but if the baby would arrive sooner i would always be happy to be a daddy :)
1 person likes this
@tonnison (47)
• Nigeria
19 Jan 07
i think the answer lies in the hands of the couples.for me it is at the best during marriage.pending on individuals want.
1 person likes this
@Poison86 (121)
• Bulgaria
19 Jan 07
I think it is not a good idea to have a chlid soon after you get married,I think you have to experience some time with your husband to see if he is really the right person to be the father of your children.
1 person likes this
• India
19 Jan 07
It totally depends on the couple's decision.I wanted to have my kid before my first wedding anniversary becaus i wanted my grandparents to see my kid..I did finally had my kid before my 2nd wedding anniversay and he isnow 2 years ld and my grandparents are eally excited to be able to play with thier great grandson.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
I'll relate your situation with mine. I'll be getting married this year, me and my fiancee decided not to have baby yet maybe after 2-3 years time. Simply because, we still want to enjoy our time being together. The time of being the only two people in the world. Because having a kid at the start of the marriage will make the two of you be more focused on the kid's welfare and needs. While you as couple, you weren't able to have the chance to explore more on the situation of being couple. Although, a baby is important and a proof of love but you can still plan on it at proper time. It's still up to you. But if a kid is born after marriage, maybe it's just meant to happen. Just accept it as a gift from heaven :)
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
It's advisable to give a little time for you and your husband to adjust with each other after the marriage. Then if you think you're ready, go for it girl! Having a baby is altogether a very wonderful feeling. Good Luck!
1 person likes this
@deepisin (93)
• India
19 Jan 07
well it depends on the maturity of your married life, yes there are various situation which also matters like your physical, mental and financial condition etc. so best time is when you are strong enough in above areas.
1 person likes this