My toddler refuses to sleep in his own bed!
By Sarah1977
@Sarah1977 (495)
United States
January 24, 2007 7:15am CST
A few months ago, my youngest son (he's 2 years old) came down with a very bad cold. Like a lot of parents, my husband and I kept him in bed with us while he was sick. After a couple of days, he was feeling much better. When it came time for bed, I brought him into his bedroom and attempted to place him lovingly into his crib. His rather insane reaction told me that he just wasn't having that, so I thought to myself "okay...maybe he needs one more night with us in our bed".
Here we are about 3 1/2 months later, and he has taken over our bed. Last night, he actually kicked me out of my bed onto the floor while he was sleeping. I literally have to get into a fetal position and stay in a small corner of my bed, because my "little" guy is anything but "little" while he sleeps.
This has also put a damper on my physical relationship with my husband. A few nights ago, I reached over to touch his hand in the middle of the night, and we actually did a "secret handshake" while we were both half asleep. That is what our once exciting love life has come down to....a secret handshake.
We have tried many times to get him back into his bed. We even bought him a "big boy" bed, thinking that might work. Nope.
Does anyone have any advice on how I can get him back into his own bed? Any and all suggestions would be much appreciated!
4 people like this
7 responses
@MNIrishAngel (23)
• United States
4 Mar 07
I feel your pain! Right now, Fiona (my 2 year old) is asleep across 75% of my bed. My husband is barely taking up the other 25% :)
In our case, to be fair, Fiona is autistic. But to me, lately, she's just being a toddler! (She is my 3rd child so I have some experience here!)
Most of the time, Fiona will sleep in her bed -- but it is NOT a crib. The crib thing does not sit well with her. We put a mattress & box spring on the floor and when I sit with her & rub her back, I am sitting on the floor (NOT on the bed!). Fiona snoozes and I can get up & leave without disturbing her).
My one suggestion: Present bedtime before your little guy is wasted tired. Get him into bed when he's sleepy and spend a little time with him.
Also -- HUGE suggestion -- white noise!!! Turn on a fan! Kids are used to a lot of sensory input all day and the sudden lack of noise can be very disorienting.
It's cool and it will pass. Always remember that :)
@MONKEYNUTS (234)
•
24 Jan 07
hi sarah.
wht a shame for you and your husband! i bet this is getting to you a bit now.
well, this is a bit of a longshot but here goes...
next time you take your son to bed , tell him that you are sleeping in his room tonight and your husband is sleeping in your bed on his own ( i am working on the lines that he needs his mom to sleep with). lie down in his room and hopefully he will follow. wait until he has gone to sleep and try and quitely sneak back into your room.
when he wakes up in his his own 'big-boy bed' he may just think ' hey this is not so bad '.
as i said this is a very longshot and feel free to tell me i haven't a clue what i am talking about!
good luck all the same!
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
24 Jan 07
Thank you Monkeynuts....I never thought to try that! I'm definitely going to take a shot at that tonight. I'll let you know how it works out!
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
13 Feb 07
Thanks for your comments Erock! It really is nice to know that I am not the only one who is dealing with a spoiled baby....I'm beginning to think that he is going to be sleeping in my bed with us until he moves out!
@brokentia (10389)
• United States
24 Mar 07
I can tell you, I have had this problem. Only...ours lasted for two years!
But the child that last two years is because he had been through a traumatic situation with a sitter that nearly killed him...and he was suffering Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.
Two years old is a tough age because they are not babies...but not all grown up yet. You have made the right step getting him his own bed. Now it takes the hard step!
Set a routine that you go through every night before bed.
When you start this routine, make sure that you are ready for that change!
Because at the same time of starting the new routine, you will have to tell him that part of the new routine is that he is going to sleep in his own bed.
And each time that he comes out, walk him back to his bed and then walk away.
The first few times you will want to remind him that it is his bed and that is where he needs to sleep. But after the first few times, do not talk anymore than saying good night. Because at that point, he will want to get you to stay by talking to him.
I know it seems very hard. Kids pull at the heart strings really well. I know...I have seven children. :) But this truly does work!!! After a few days, you will be surprised how much easier he is going to bed. But it is making it through the first few days that is tough!
Best of luck sweetie!
@Sarah1977 (495)
• United States
26 Mar 07
I took my son to the doctor for his 2 year check-up, and she asked me about his sleeping habits. I told her that he sleeps in bed with my husband and I, and her suggestion freaked me out. She told me to LOCK him in his bedroom, and don't open the door no matter how much he cries and bangs on the door. She said that even if he falls asleep on the floor in front of the door, at least he will learn that he needs to sleep in his own bedroom. That sounds like child abuse to me, and I could NEVER put my baby through that. Your suggestion sounds much better....thank you.
@suren2k6cse (2621)
• India
12 Mar 07
i think you have to control your feeling or u switch to other bed
@Capndon (337)
• India
4 Mar 07
I think what you could do is you could try changing beds a few days. That puts him out of sync & he should be able to reset his mindset. Frankly no kid 2 years old would pass the chance to be between his parents. The warmth there is noway comparable with anything else in the world. Especially at his age when everything seems bigger than him & only his parents (especially mommy) look his size to him.
The other way could be that you spend a little more time with him during the day (both mom & dad) so he feels he's got his fill & try slowly to push him back into his bed.
the last thing you could do is leave him there & wait for him to grow out of it. Kids especially guys are quick in getting their ego going so pretty soon he's gotta get his going & move out of your bed :)
@ravirana22882 (49)
• India
6 Feb 07
sarah
u need to control urself kids are allthing after marriage
i think ur son wants to enjoying ur physical life that is why he don't want to leave ur bed and want to sleep with u and ur husband this is bad for him
try to understand him that this is the bad thing for him
and he need to sleep on his bed
don't cry on him just love him and he will understand if u will understand him with love and with ur way to understand
i think u need to do a one thing for him buy a pc game for him and arrange it in his room he will play in his room and sleep there after play
if u r satisfy with my advise than please mail me
we can become friends
rana_leo82@yahoo.co.in
my name is rana and i m from india
doing job in university
please
