Do you believe Divorce is the only answer to an broken relationship?

@Bee1955 (3885)
United States
January 24, 2007 7:48pm CST
I always felt if there's a will there's a way. Counselings, retreats, talks,and prayers seem to do better than a trip to the lawyer's office or divorce judge. Ive been there and used many of these suggestions and a few worked. We're still together. Relationships need time to regroup. Try the suggestions or other ideas you may have first before going the "easy" route to the divorce court.
15 people like this
114 responses
@manong05 (5029)
• Philippines
25 Jan 07
There is a difference between "relationship in distress" and "broken" relationship. In a troubled relationship (in distress) divorce must never be an option to be considered. There are more than 1000 ways to fix the problem. When you say "broken" it implies a relationship that has totally gone down the drain and there is no more "will" to speak of either caused by irreconcilable differences and other psychological or emotional reasons. Cases like these, divorce is the best answer. Unfortunately, I live in a country that doesn't permit divorce. I don't have a need for it anyway, I have a wonderful marriage. I only tried to look at the issue as objectively as I could.
4 people like this
• United States
25 Jan 07
I think it really depends on the relationship. Some couples just reach a point where staying together and getting along isn't an option because they've stopped getting along ages ago, they're always fighting, nothing between them works, then I'd have to say that those two probably aren't meant to be married any longer. Other couples that have bouts and disagreements about some things, or issues that can be resolved, especially if the two are willing to work, I think there are other ways to help them.
4 people like this
@emquinsat (1059)
• Philippines
25 Jan 07
I think divorce should be the last resort. If you love your partner, you have to do everything to keep the relationship. And sometimes if there's a problem, you just have to lower your pride and say sorry especially if it's your fault.
@paulnet (748)
• India
25 Jan 07
well said
@Idlewild (6094)
• United States
25 Jan 07
I agree. It seems some people give up too quickly. If they're not going to work hard to make things work, maybe they shouldn't have gotten married in the first place. I wonder is some couples get married too quickly because they're thinking in the back of their minds that it's easy to get a divorce if things don't work out.
2 people like this
25 Jan 07
I think its really up to that person, and couple whether they go for a clean break and get a divorce or whether they try counselling, marriage guidance and seperation. When one partner is violent to the other, or there is no way back, divorce is sometimes the only option.
3 people like this
• India
25 Jan 07
People who are involved in such relationships should think about what went wrong in their relation and try to rebuild it.Divorce is not the real solution.The couple must have a chat between them and know about each other very well.They should think whether they will be able to live their life happily with their partner.They should voice their thoughts,feelings and interests to each other.Often miscommunication and hastiness is the cause for the broken relationship.People need time to adjust to their partner phsically and emotionally.One should take into account all the positive and negative qualities of both of them and then make a decision.Divorce is necessarily not an answer to a broken relationship.If the couple can bridge the gap after few discussions then why need to break it.Divorce must be used only as a last option.
@camille101 (1027)
• United Arab Emirates
25 Jan 07
"Divorce", the most controversial word in a marriage relationship should be the last recourse of a couple in the brink of break-up. When all other means are exhausted, then maybe it can be the last solution. A lots of compromise and sacrifice should be exercise in a marriage or else if only selfishness evolves then everything will crumble into pieces.
• India
25 Jan 07
when the understanding between the couple is gone, one could not tolerate the behaviour of the other, and at a stage both will feel they can lead a peaceful life if they were separated, then the only solution is Divorce. of course, Divorce should be the final one, after all the counselling and retreats, but if none of the couples are ready to adjust, wht else can be done?
3 people like this
@mgr1987 (689)
• India
25 Jan 07
do you think that a third person's advice will just heal the mind of the couple who desparately need to part each other.i don't think so.once broken,it can't be fixed.
3 people like this
@rms2727 (815)
• India
25 Jan 07
good of you to have started a discussion like this cos today its wierd that a bit of strain arises in a relation and the people rush off to the lawyer, i dont know why they are in so much of a hurry and dont wish to think about solving the problem.
3 people like this
@Multanee (268)
• Pakistan
25 Jan 07
Divore is the last solution of broken relation when every thing is finished i.e counceling etc.It is the ultimate solution.
3 people like this
• Pakistan
25 Jan 07
councelling... compromise... communication... divorce shud b the ultimate thing.. because it ENDS things COMPLETELY and most of the time.. there is no turning back.. HARDLY EVER any divorces are undone.. and the same couple gets remarried to each other...
3 people like this
• Philippines
25 Jan 07
I dont deny that divorce is an answer but it is not the only option left and it should not be the first choice to make. I think the very first thing to do is to go back to the day when you both made a vow in front of man and in front of your god that you are going to stick with each other through thick and thin, no matter what the tide.
@kgwat70 (13395)
• United States
25 Jan 07
I believe in other options as well before choosing divorce to end a relationship. Marriage counseling would be the first thing that I would try if me and my spouse were having problems getting along or agreeing on things. Sometimes two people need a break from each other and time to themselves to think things over as well. Two people could get a separation for a little while and see how that works. I would only choose divorce if it was so bad and nothing else worked or if my spouse did something really bad that I could not forgive like cheating or being violent or hurting my kids if I had any.
@maru_047in (1007)
• India
25 Jan 07
It is not true always their is some incidence which causes that but not in all the case and i m against it and i think the broken relationship has to be rejoined by finding out the faults and making them feel good if once the relationship is broken then the happiness in that is also broken so it is not fair in such cases if the faults are not solvable then divorce might be the only answer so it need to be checked thoroghly and then decide cause it is not a childs play.
• Canada
25 Jan 07
If the relationship is abusive then I believe divorce is the best way out. No one deserves to live in an abusive relationship. If the relationship is calling apart because of misunderstandings, I believe they can be resolved with outside help, and divorce may not be necessary.
3 people like this
@rama_k7 (71)
• India
25 Jan 07
Divorce should always be a last resort for any broken relationship. It is necessary that they should first sit and discuss the pros and cons of the split in theirn relationship. If this doesnot work there is always counselling and when that to ends in disaster they can aswell try through friends, relatives etc if they are really serious of living together. If nothing works then no other go than going legal for a divorce.
3 people like this
@gemini1960 (1162)
• Philippines
25 Jan 07
i think its true we must try our very best to patch upt hings with our spouse/partner first...without resulting into divorce..just think of our children if we do some drastic things in our married life..
• United States
25 Jan 07
I think it depends on all that is involved in the marriage. What happened? Are both partners still in love and willing or is one willing and the other not willing? You can't have a marriage or relationship with only one person, If the other person refuses to care or help the relationship than I think they should divorce. If both are willing. than I say work it out.
3 people like this
@sureshmoe (974)
• India
25 Jan 07
I can't beleive at any time and at any occasion....I too say that "Compromise" between each other is the best solution...This is occurs due to having no good understanding between each other and without compromising....
3 people like this
• Philippines
25 Jan 07
give yourself a break. have some time alone.
3 people like this