Change your approach to life: A lesson we all need to learn.
January 25, 2007 3:50pm CST
I'm trying to discipline myself to do at least one hour of spiritual study per day- don't worry, I'm not here to preach or convert. I just thought that as I'm developing my practice, one of the most honorable things I could do would be to share a message from Joyce Meyer. She's a protestant preacher (I am not a Christian, but her message was enlightening)/televangelist. I normally never watch these programs (or do watch them to mock them- I know, bad karma), but her words rang true from the beginning. We, most of us, anyway suffer from excessive concern over what others think of us. Many people even become physically sick from their conflicts with others. They fall into and endless cycle of getting upset and offended, which soon turns to anger or worry. We don't know how to deal with either of those emotions, so it's easier for us to pass blame onto someone else. "Why do I feel angry? Because she said something negative about me. It's HER fault that I'm angry!!!". No you not only have inner strife, but you've also got strife with someone else! With this mindset, it's easier for you to get upset with her even more quickly the next time there's any conflict, and for her to do the same with you. Before you know it, you're both looking to be offended. "You see, I knew she wouldn't offer to buy lunch! I just knew it! She did it again!" We're almost hoping to get revved up and upset at people, as they are with us. This is detrimental for both of you. Why are you always upset? Because you have no peace. And here's the key to her sermon: You will never have peace if you don't have it on purpose. It's so obvious but seems to elude nearly all of us. We can say, "Yeah, but it's not my fault. People are unkind to me. They use me. They don't understand me then criticize me." Again, placing blame. Yes, there are a lot of people out there who are mean, who don't have your best interest at heart, who like to see you upset. It sucks, but that's how it is. Since you're not going to change those people or change the world we live in, your only option is to change yourself. Getting upset does not solve any problem. If you're like me, you can get upset over several insignificant, but annoying occurences. You play them over in your head. "The world is out to get you. Can't anything just ever go my way?", etc. Then you're complaining about it to your friend. Now you're so worked up because your cable is out, you got stuck in traffic, and your dog threw up on the bed that your emotions are at the breaking point. Getting upset in these situations is fine, and only normal. What's damaging is letting your emotions control you. You lose your sense of judgement. You say and do things you'll later regret. Think of all the crimes that are referred to as 'Crimes of Passion'. These emotions that send you overboard, will not be there in the future. You'll just be left with the damage and regret. Work toward being spiritually mature and you'll save yourself and others from such suffering. A spiritually mature person is someone who can remain calm no matter what's going on. It's a hard road to attain that kind of maturity, but it will get you peace. If you made it to the end of this post, thanks. I hope it speaks to you as it did to me. You can find her site at: joycemeyer.org. Again, I'm not trying to push religion on anyone. I just thought that this was a clear lesson on how we can all lower our blood pressure and maintain relationships.
2 people like this
• United States
30 Jan 07
What a great discussion to start; I hope some others will jump on board. It's interesting that the same message can come from very different sources. Strangely enough, this made me think of Red Greene (do you know the duct tape guy?) who said that he had to learn that when his wife is mad, she isn't always mad at him. Just like when she is chilly, she isn't chilly at him, she just needs a sweater. In your spiritual journey, I have two more sources to consider. Eckhart Tolle, who presents a zen message without the dogma. (At least as far as I have gotten with him, and I have just started listening and reading.) It's all about the present moment. The Power of Now is one of his books. And Stanislav Grof, a fascinating individual who did early work with LSD when it was legal. His slant is science related to cosmic experiences.And if you get a chance to hear one of his recordings, he is just so cool. His latest book is When the Impossible Happens and previous ones were about the Holotropic Universe. I know that sounds dry and technical, but he is very entertaining, or I wouldn't be staying awake through it. Great chatting with you in this way!
• United States
30 Jan 07
Thanks for responding. I've been waiting for you. What a let-down to type so much and to have not a single response. I always appreciate your contributions and your suggestions. I'll be sure to look up Tolle and Grof and get back to you.