fussy children in resteraunts...

@wmaharper (2316)
United States
January 26, 2007 2:25pm CST
Yesterday, My hubby and I decided we would go out to eat, we hadn't been in awhile and decided we needed to treat ourselves, now having no sitter, of course the children came along. We didn't go to a fancy resturaunt, because of the kids, we don't like to have to worry about our kids being too loud. We went to a family resturaunt. Even then though, our youngest started to get VERY loud, he loves to squeal and scream, and he is VERY VERY loud.. so loud that he makes his big brother upset. Well we were sitting there, and my four month old is getting louder and louder, he's not upset, he's not tired, he's not hungry and he's not wet, just LOUD... well I finally told my hubby, we need to get our food to go, because I can't handle this anymore. It's not that HE was bothering ME, but I felt like he was bothering other people. I dont' know maybe it's just me, but I don't like thinking I'm ruining anyone else's time, by my baby screaming in the resturaunt. SO, we got to-go boxes and went home where my baby could squeal to his hearts content, and we had a nicer time than we would have had we stayed. Do you ever leave a resturaunt because your children are being loud?
3 people like this
18 responses
@kabella50 (309)
• United States
29 Jan 07
no but you did the right thing in a way but better than that was your attitude about it,you said you went home and still enjoyed yourselves and the baby could scream it's heart out.Good for you.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
thankyou.. yes we had a better time at home than we would have there.
• United States
29 Jan 07
Your chose the right restraunt. Its a family restraunt and if you feel as though you want to go out and be more family orientated you do have the right. Like you said it is a family restraunt and thats your family. If people so not like the way you are raising your child they should be the ones to leave. You arnt wrong for leaving if thats your decision but there is no law that a young child can not be loud out in public. If you feel he or she is being to loud then you should talk to them and be strict with letting them know they need to calmn down and not be so loud. I understand he is probably young but if you teachhim from the start he will then relize what is going on and maybe start to listen to you request!! Good Luck and Enjoy being a Mother!!
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Thank you for your comment. I do agree that children need to learn from a young age about being respectful to other people and thier rights to eat peacefully, I do however think that a four month old is not old enough to understand this philosophy and definently too young to benifit from any kind of discipline for it. I have a feeling you are thinking the child is older. Thankyou for your response.
@crazynurse (7482)
• United States
27 Jan 07
Oh my. Please go on national television and tell this story! No, we don't leave because our children are loud, we leave becasue OHTER PEOPLE's children are loud! I can't believe that some parents are so inconsiderate that they will continue to sit in a restaurant (especially if it is upscale and people are paying a bundle to eat there) and let their children disturb others! When my children were young, I did exactly as you did, so as to not disturb others AND because usually my child was misrable or they wouldn't have been fussy in the first place! If I had tried everything and they were fussy, I assumed they were bored and got a doggy box and left, rather than disturb other people. The last time my husband and I went out to eat (a fairly nice place..not a 'family style', we were bothered by a little boy, age approximately 3-4 years,who kept standing up in his seat and reaching over the divider and playing in my husband's hair. Now mind you, his little hands were covered in food! We were trying to discuss so very important business and were continually bothered by this child! His parents ate, seemingly unaware of the child's antics! As WE LEFT, we notice him pulling/swinging on a very large hanging plant that was looking like it might topple into the poor man's head who was seated behind there table!
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Ha. Wow some people are inconsiderate. I know there have been times when My hubby and I were out with the kids, and othe peoples kids would bother us. One time in particular, we were at a booth, and a little boy kept hitting the back of my hubby's booth, his parents weren't paying attention, so my hubby leaned over and told the kid to stop, he didn't listen so he decided to say something louder so the parents could hear, he said something like "buddy, would you please stop doing that, that's really irritating" and then of course the parents acted like he was hurting thier precious baby. *sigh* (: thanks for the response.
@moonmagick (1458)
• United States
29 Jan 07
My baby is a screamer/squealer. He just squeals and screams instead of babbling and giggling like some kids. He isnt wet or hungry or hurt, just communicating. If we are in a store and most of the way done, I try to finish asap and get out of there. If he is like that when we go out to eat, usually we give up and get it to go. I know that we certainly dont go out to eat as much as we used to. We used to go out all the time, now its call ahead/curbside service. I am used to it, he does it all day at home, but I dont want to ruin other people's evenings, and my husband gets embarassed by it.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Yes, That's what we prefer to do to, is order it to go.. that way no one has to cook, and we can enjoy our meal at home.. the added bonus is that you don't have to pay a tip.
• United States
28 Jan 07
My toddler is used to going to restaurants to eat so nowadays, she knows what is expected of her...to behave and wait for us to finish eating and then pay before she can get out of her chair. But at the start, when she squirmed and makes noises, I get her out of her chair and take her outside of the restaurant and talk to her that if she doesn't behave, we can't go back and we can't eat. I am just trying to be considerate to other people in the restaurant because I know that they are out for relaxation not to listen to lots of noise and be disturbed.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Yes I agree.. that's what we do with our toddler as well, but you can't do much with a four month old. (:
@cjthedog64 (1552)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Luckly, we've never had a problem. DS (13 months) can be very tired, but he won't sleep if we're doing something. Only at home or in the car. Occasionally at my in-laws for a holiday. But even when he's cranky, he loves smiling at people, and they'll say how cute he is, etc. He knows how to behave at the table, so he does it when we're out too. Of course, once we get in the car he's out like a light. If he ever does start acting up, we'll either try to finish eating as quickly as we can, or get the food boxed up, depending on how far along we are.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
yes, when my son gets older, hopefully he'll be better, once he's old enough to be taught that we need to keep our voices quiet in public. (:
• United States
27 Jan 07
Yes, I have once. My children were fighting and talking back and I was not going to have it anymore. People started to look and stare, so we got our food to go. Of course, while waiting for our food to get ready, they quieted down, but I still left so they could get the point. I have not had to leave another restaurant since.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
YEs, it seems like once they realize that they won't get away with it, they usually don't try it again (especially when they are old enough to understand the connection) Thanks!
@SplitZip (1488)
• Portugal
27 Jan 07
If he's only four months old, there isn't much you can do but leave or annoy everyone else in the restaurant, but perhaps getting a sitter would be best, so that you can also enjoy yourself for a little while.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
YEs, I agree, we need a sitter, it's hard though as we don't really have anyone here, we could drive an hour and a half to my sisters, but then it would be an almost guarantee that the kids would be grouchy for her.. We're looking into a mother's night out program a local church has, hopefully that'll work out. thanks!
@ashjoe76 (1422)
• India
26 Jan 07
That's an awkward situation. But sometimes, we may just be overconcerned and other people may not consider it a great disturbance. Most of the people are used to what children are like, when they really young to show their emotions through their screams and squeals.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
27 Jan 07
yes, it's true, problably no one cared, but I would hate to ruin someone's date out or something.
@uath13 (8192)
• United States
26 Jan 07
I've left stores, restaurants & movies. If the kid dosen't act well in public they shouldn't be there.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
27 Jan 07
Yes..I agree. I know I don't particualary enjoy listening to screaming children when I'm trying to watch a movie.
@Zebrochka (333)
• Brazil
27 Jan 07
Dear wmaharper, thank you VERY MUCH for being such a wise person and consider the interests of other people! It is really very annoying to have a screaming baby next to you in a public place. The point is that in most cases the babies' parents are not are wise as you and they just stay enjoying themselves and spoiling other people's time. Thanks a lot!
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
ha, your welcome. I don't see how you can enjoy yourself with a screaming, squealing baby next to you, knowing that everyone else is having to listen to the baby because of YOU. Some people are very inconsiderate I suppose.
• United States
27 Jan 07
I have never left a resturant because of my miss behaving child. I have taken the child to the bathroom until he has calmed down, or have just taken him out of the high chair. I hate it when other people are so judgemental.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
29 Jan 07
YEs,it's true people do become judgemental. I guess it depends for me, if my son is just misbehaving than I can usually get him to calm down, but there really isn't anything I can do for my 4 month old, to get him to be quiet.. he just likes to hear the sound of his own voice.. but once he's older hopefully things will be easier.
@slavena (87)
• Canada
26 Jan 07
Yes, I leave resturaunts all the time because my daughter is wayy TOO LOUD, and for no reason basically. Even when we go shopping she's loud. She just wants to run around the whole place and she always wants to be centre of attention. I guess she just likes to show off in front of people she doesn't really know.
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
27 Jan 07
Yes, Sometimes My oldest gets like that.
@nexis777 (134)
• United States
26 Jan 07
I've not taken my items to go, but I have hurried the meal along when my little baby was crying for no particular reason. It does depend on the restaurant for me. If I'm going to a place that's got a lot of noise already, or if there aren't a lot of people near me I might let it go. I know it really bothers my husband if he feels like she's disturbing the other diners, so it can be a bit straining for me. It would definitely depend on the type of loud for me too. If the child is being a happy loud, then I wouldn't worry too much about it, but if it's angry or something, people would probably appreciate seeing the baby go home.
1 person likes this
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
27 Jan 07
Yes, there are a few resturaunts here that we LOVE just because they are already so loud, so no matter how loud my kids get, I don't feel bad.
@Muslimah (811)
• United States
26 Jan 07
Ive left stores i was shopping in because my daughter would not stop crying. I had the same problem as you. Nothing was wrong it just she didnt want to be there. And the weird part is when we get home she A OK. LOL
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
27 Jan 07
YEah, we haven't had to leave a store yet, although I'm surprised, usually my sons are in good moods when we are shopping, b/c we plan it that way, but every once in awhile they start to misbehave...though I have had to take my 2 year old to the restroom to talk to him. It's funny though how as soon as you get home, they are fine!
@kmgupta (561)
• India
29 Jan 07
no children will play
• Philippines
29 Jan 07
it happens to us most of the time. we go in a restaurant to have ourselves a treat and have a family bonding, but then all will be ruined with my kids' tantrums. sometimes the tantrums goes together. so instead of us taking our meal and enjoying ourselves, we just always decide to have it taken out and eat at home. so instead of watching a movie after that restaurant meal, we just end up staying at home and watch the local tv shows.
1 person likes this
@rkalia73 (240)
• India
27 Jan 07
I think this was the most appropriate thing to do, because in the end it made everybody happy. If you had stayed in resturaunt, kid's loudness may have made you guilty. So in the circumstances it was the most appropriate action to take. Sometimes it pays to listen to your heart...:-))