Who talks more,women or men?
January 28, 2007 6:35am CST
The seeningly contradictory evidence is reconciled by the difference what I call public and private speaking. More men feel comfortable by doing 'public speaking',while more women feel comfortable doing 'private' speaking. Another way of capturing these differences is by using the term report-talk and rapport talk. For most women,the language of conversation is primarily a language of rapport:a way of establishing connections and negotiating relationships. Emphasis is placed on displaying similarities and matching experiences. From childhood, girls criticize peers who try to stand out or appear better than others. People feel their closest connections at home, or in settings where they feel like home with one or a few people they feel close to and comfortable with in other words, during private speaking. But even the most public situations can be approached like private speaking. Fof most men,talk is primarily a means to preserve independence and negotiate and maintain status in a hierarchical social order. This is done by exhibiting knowledge and skill, and by holding center stage through verbal performance such as storytelling,joking,or imparting information. From childhood, men learn to use talking as a way to get and keep attention. So they are more comfortable speaking in larger groups made up of perple they know less well,in the broadest sense,'public speaking'. But even the most private situations can be approached like public speaking,more like giving a report than establishing rapport.