step parents

@kids91911 (4365)
United States
October 9, 2006 8:16am CST
my daughters stepmother wants her father to sign off on her because she does not like my daughter. what do you all think? my daughter is only 5 years old!!!
2 people like this
13 responses
@ossie16d (11825)
• Australia
19 Oct 06
I would say tough luck and if your daughter's father is caught in the middle then he will just have to make alternative arrangements to see his daughter somewhere other than where his wife is. It is the right of every child to know who their parents are, and that included BOTH mother and father, and that is what you should be telling him. Is your daughter the only child you had together and if so, possibly the stepmother is jealous of your past relationship. Good luck to your daughter.
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
19 Oct 06
You are right. She is jealous of anything that looks like a female. I basically told her that I will not allow her father to sign off on her. That is my daughters right to be with her father. She told him to make a choice. I told him that blood is thicker that water. She is the only child we had together, but he now has 2 girls with her. I basically told her that if she divorces him that my husband and I will help him fight for custody of his other 2 daughters. She can not keep her sisters away from my daughter and their father. Now she hates me even more. Sorry but I think it is my daughters right to see her sisters and father.
1 person likes this
@ossie16d (11825)
• Australia
19 Oct 06
I was pleased to read that you are fighting for your daughter's right to see and know her father. Keep it up because he has no right to abandon any child he fathers and his current wife just has to accept that he had a child with another women and get over it. Congratulations on taking the stance you have and never give up on it either. :)
2 people like this
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
19 Oct 06
I am just real sick of his and her sh**. All I care about is my daughters right and the way I look at it is If she doesn't like it she can kiss my a**!!! I am putting my foot down and will not let it up until he gets his head out of his a**! My daughter deserves to know her father and sisters. She is not going to stop it either!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Oct 06
I think that your ex's wife needs to grow up and realize that she married a man who already has a family! If she loves him then she needs to learn to accept the people that he loves, not try to change him and she should not try to place herself between a father and daughter. Shame on her!
1 person likes this
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
19 Oct 06
She doesn't care. Her words were "You are a part time dad to her and what does she contribute to this family. She is never here." She has called at 2:30 AM to tell us that they are going away and not to bother bringing my daughter up. And then when I get a hold of him the next morning he has no idea what is going on and says to bring her. I deal with this every other weekend. He is always making excuses on what is going on. He makes excuses for her to on the way that she acts. Well she had a hard childhood. So what so did I but guess what I am an adult now with kids. It is not my life it is their life. She is rude and acts worse than a 2 year old throwing a fit!
• United States
19 Oct 06
It doesn't matter what she "contributes". What she gives him is the love a little girl has for her daddy. As for this wife having a bad childhood? What has she decided to give you daughter one too? Why don't you try having your husband pick her up and refuse to speak to his wife as long as she is hostile towards your daughter?
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
19 Oct 06
Because it is not just me she hates. She does not like my daughter either. She told me that to my face.
@crystal8577 (1466)
• United States
6 Jan 08
How does the father feel? This girl in only 5 give me a break. I think the stepmom needs a reality check. I am sure she knew he had a daughter before they married. If she did not want to be a stepmom then she should have stayed single. Kids are a part of marriage.
1 person likes this
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
2 Oct 08
Thank you for your response!
@jennifer611 (2514)
• United States
19 Dec 07
That's gotta be tough for you guys to be going through. when I was a little girl I was such a daddies girl. most girls are.. thats very selfish of this lady.. I think she is just jealous.. whether its because she is YOUR daughter or because it's another female he has to share his love with and she can't have him all to herself.. she needs to get over it and grow up.. I hope that he is a real man and that he keeps in his daughters life instead of letting her take him away from his own child.. I hope she don't have any kids of her own acting that way.
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
2 Oct 08
Thank you for your response!
• United States
1 Feb 07
that is so sad and I hope your daughters father wont allow someone to dictate his relationship with his child. I am a stepmom and have been since Alicia was about 2- I bonded with her and took time to get to know her, she is now married and expecting her second daughter. I value this relationship cause we are close and she calls me her other mom and has said she appreciates all I bring to her life. I dont even call her a step daugher cause I feel she is mine,and her kids are my grandkids. This stepmom of your daughters is missing out. Kids are such a blessing!Best of luck to you Hun!
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
2 Oct 08
Thank you for your response!
• United States
31 Jan 07
I would say that this is outrageous! It is not her place to make that decision or pressure him to make that decision... it is stepparents like this who give the rest of us all a bad name! We are not all like this!!!!! I would be outraged if my hubby even THOUGHT about giving up his relationship with his kids... it would disgust me and I am not sure if I could even be with him if he made that decision. She will have a lot to think about later on down the road... sounds to me like she is just insecure with the relationship... also makes me wonder if it is so much your daughter that has caused this, or the thought of him having continued contact with you?
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
2 Oct 08
Thank you for your response!
• Canada
19 Dec 06
This is really a heart-wrenching case. Usually step parents will have hard time dealing with their step child as per my feelings. Because you often feel the child is not made up from your blood. So there is no blood relation, only physical relations between the parents. But then this is also a part of life. Therefore one should understand other's feelings. Understanding among children and parents is important to keep healthy atmostphere at home.
1 person likes this
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
19 Dec 06
Yes but she knew he had my daughter before she got with him. Plus for a her to hate a 5 year old girl. I think she needs a reality check and needs to grow up. My daughter acts smarter than her.
@lissaj (532)
• United States
13 Dec 06
Someone should give the stepmother a good kick in the rear. She knew he had a daughter when she married him, so she is just going to have to suck it up and deal with it. He is your daughters father, he is responsible for her and that's just the way it is. You don't have kids and when someone doesn't like them, just give them away. That man should be signing off on his divorce papers, not signing himself out of his child's life.
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
14 Dec 06
As of today he has not seen her for 2 months. So does that tell you who won the contest. NOT MY DAUGHTER.
• United States
1 Dec 06
That is crazy. If he still loves her after she has made this clear then there is something seriously wrong. I mean if she wants to be with him and love him then she needs to accept his child(ren) too.
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
1 Dec 06
That is what I thought but he hasn't seen or talked to my daughter in 2 months now.
• United States
1 Dec 06
It sounds like this woman is not very secure with herself. She wants your daughter's father all to herself. If he does this he really isn't much of a person. It angers me so badly when women try to control men like this, and vice versa. I hope that this gets resolved for your daughter's sake.
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
1 Dec 06
He has stopped all contact with my daughter for 2 months now.
@Smclin1 (325)
• United States
11 Dec 06
She sounds like one messed up chick! Keep fighting, good luck
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
11 Dec 06
Thank you for your response!
• United States
10 Dec 06
Any man that would allow a woman to come between him and his child is no man at all. I would sit down and have a discussion with your ex. I would point blank tell him that if he is going to allow a woman to destroy his relationship with his child, then maybe his child is better off without him. It is very sad for your daughter, but does she need someone in her life that would do that to her. Also does she need a stepmom in her life that would be so awful to her? Honestly, this woman is NO woman at all, and is jealous. Real women, dont feel threatened because their men have children. Sounds to me like she needs to grow up. I think I might sit down with her and find out what her real problem is. Is she jealous of the child, or the link her hubby has to you (via the child). Sounds to me like she is insecure. I think you have to protect your child at all cost, but let it be his decision that way when your daughter is older you can say you did everything you could to salvage the relationship with her father and her. She needs positive male influence in her life, and this man may cause abandonment issues she definitely doesnt need. You sound like a good mom, so dont let this woman bother you. Just be mature about it, and lay it all out on the table. Let him make his decision and if he continues to see your child, make it CLEAR you wont put up with his wife treating your child with any disrespect. Good luck!
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
11 Dec 06
Thank you for your response!
• United States
8 Dec 06
i have a stepson and i love him just like he was my own. i new just like your exs did that the kids were there befor us if she didn t like it then she shouldn t have married him.its not like she didn t know about her os she needs to get over it. but what do you mean exactly by sign off on her tell her to go to hell jk it just make it harder on your little girl have you talk to her dad what does he want to do
@kids91911 (4365)
• United States
11 Dec 06
Thank you for your response!