self confindence to start within the family?

@leonilyn (467)
Philippines
February 1, 2007 11:39pm CST
is it right to say that confidence should start within the family? i guess so.. i grew up in a family that is simple and humble. But this simpleness and humbleness makes me feel less out of myself. i can feel it right now compared to my other confident colleagues. i dont want this to happen with my kids. i always see to it that they have enough confidence with them when they face the real world.
2 people like this
10 responses
• India
6 Feb 07
hi........ self confidence is very important it should from family to achieve our goal
2 people like this
• Australia
20 Feb 07
I agree with you that self confidence start from your very own family. Although it can also be hone in school joining a lot of extra curicular activities will also make you more confident. The parents should also praise and appreciate their kids once in awhile to whatever accomplishments they have done so the kids will have more confidence in theirselves. I think it is very important that a child have a good self steem when he grows up. I like this discussion leonilyn. Made me think if I am confident.
1 person likes this
@leonilyn (467)
• Philippines
20 Feb 07
Thank you bestfriends.. just want to share what i felt.. i dont want to feel less of myself but i dont have enough confident..:) that is what i want to conquer... i want to have enough confidence in myself.. :) hope i can make it.. :)
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
6 Feb 07
it definately starts at home....growing up i was the verbal 'punching' bag and was always critisized, poked fun at, never shown love and so on which made me have pretty much ZERO confidence...the exprssion "if you hear something long enough you'll believe it" is very true especially when it comes to being told negative things about yourself...I had no confidence in myself, my abilities or nothing of the sort until I was in my 20s....I'm a mom now and though my kids dont have 100% confidence in themselves they TRY even if they think they cant do it and thats important IMO.... Best thing you can do for your kids is IMO encourage them, praise them, never tell them or give them the impression that you are ashamed or disappointed in something they've done just because its not as good as you expected or as good as someone elses work or attempts etc.....I found wiht my kids when they bring home a less then their best test grade or something I never down talk them...I always ask "did you try your best?" and I'll follow up with "its ok, you did your best and now you knwo the mistakes for next time so you dont repeat them" and I always always tell them I'm proud of them...because of all that they WANT to do their best and they are proud of themselves just for trying their best....make sense?? big thing though, you are already tackling any future problem simply by recognizing how you feel due to your upbringing and realizing that you dont want that for your children....thats a great start right there IMO
1 person likes this
@leonilyn (467)
• Philippines
8 Feb 07
thank you ravenn very nice response right there.. i will take your advice... it do really made sense.. :)
@lauriefnp (5111)
• United States
4 Feb 07
I was brought up in a family where my parents worked really hard to help us to learn good judgement and decision making skills and good work ethic. We were praised appropriately for accomplishments, but not falsely. We were encouraged to participate in activities such as skating, dance, and baseball and to socialize with friends. We knew without question that they loved us and that we were special. I think that helps kids a lot as they go out into the world, to have a good sense of self worth.
@leonilyn (467)
• Philippines
6 Feb 07
yes youre right.. my mom always discourages me of joining some scool ativities.. if i could remember it right during my elementary days i want to be a school athlete but she did not allow me because i have a weak heart she says.. in college i joined a softball team she always nags because i cant wash the clothes during weekends.. since then i already dont have the courage of joining extra curricular activities.. and now in our office i am invited to be the lead vocalist for the band to represent our company i did not accept it because i think i could not do it.. :( by the way i am trying to believe in myself.. my hubby told me that i am good. :)
@chavezrmc (6095)
• Philippines
15 Feb 07
i can understand what you mean. But being humble doesn't mean that you don't have self confidence. Better you let them grow to be a little more independent in a way they are developing this confidence that needed. Guide them and im sure they will grow the way u like them to. good luck!
@leonilyn (467)
• Philippines
16 Feb 07
thanksz buddy... i hope they will grow i want them to. i dont want them to be overconfident but i dont want them to lack confidence too...
@ashumit02 (818)
• United States
11 Feb 07
This is right to say that self confidence should be start in the family .But it must be try outside the family too .This makes us confident at large scale .I think most of us who are self confident in there family are also confident in outside it .I actually have a problem to think like confident people .
1 person likes this
@leonilyn (467)
• Philippines
11 Feb 07
yes being confident outside our family can gain confidence in a larger scope.. thanks for your reply..
@Willowlady (10658)
• United States
2 Feb 07
Parents do have the responsibility to instill in their children as much as they are able the tools, skills and attitudes for success in this life. There are tender souls that never will be the warriors of our world, however, we can instill in them some self worth.
1 person likes this
@leonilyn (467)
• Philippines
6 Feb 07
thanks willow.. i hope me and my hubby can be a source of self confidence for our kids..
@vivien_9 (229)
• Philippines
11 Feb 07
yeah, family is also one factor to develop confidence. There are nsome things that you can do so that it will not happen to your kids.
1 person likes this
@jsae29 (1120)
• Philippines
6 Feb 07
I guess so. Home is were we really molded. It is our first school. Parents are the ones giving us strength and confidence. Their support or approval of something makes us brave and courageous. And thier disapproval usually gives us second thought. on the other hand, I think humility and confidence are two good character of person and I believe they do not at all contardict each other. Having confidence is the belief in your ability and skills. While humility is the quality of not being too proud about yourself.
• Philippines
19 Feb 07
I believe that all the traits and characteristics that a person acquire is usually rooted in his/her family. It just depends on the person on how he/she will develop more these traits through the experiences that he/she will be going through. Being simple and humble are actually very strong traits because it takes a lot of fighting your pride and ego in order to be humble and being simple is also hard especially if you grew up in a place where people usually judge you for your appearance. You should actually be more confident because not a lot of people could acquire such traits. Confidence doesn't come from whether you're simple and humble or boastful and full of pride. Confidence always comes from knowing what you're capable of doing and not letting anyone make you think lesser of them.