why do women likes to play games

United States
February 3, 2007 2:03pm CST
I have goten out of a relationship in May and all women including my ex who I try to date and dated says they want a good guy,But when I try to be the good guy they don't want that. They want a bad boy who treats them bad,abusive , Or they are not used to it,and they dont know how to act. Now I have talked to a lot of women and they would kill for a man to treat them like a lady, and when one does treat them like a lady they throw them away. So women guys why women play games.Ladie answer this dont you like it when your cold and a guy gives you his jacket or give you roses at work dont you women like that? maybe i am just old fashion let me hear what you think peace n lov iceman
11 people like this
47 responses
• United States
3 Feb 07
Well I have ran into the same problem. When I was a bad guy (notorously hetrosexual)(Fonzy bad not Ike Turner bad), all of these women fought over mee yet now that I am a good guy I get taken for granted all of the time. I am about to become that peice of sh!t I was before atleast then I will not care and will not get hurt. Thank you for the GREAT DISCUSSION and have a great day!! Oh crap forgot to answer your question..... I really do not know why but if you do find out please let mee know!!
2 people like this
@ricknkae (1726)
• United States
3 Feb 07
I like your post meeandnotyou ... and i like your name too actually LOL anyway if it is true that women tend to be attracted to the Fonzy bad guy type, they probably consider only DATING him and not MARRYING him ( or go steady) what I mean is you fantasize about the bad guy but you marry the nice one ;) Or at least I did LOL
2 people like this
• United States
3 Feb 07
Well brother, First i would like to say thank you for your responding to my discussion. I really hope that you don't turn back into the piece of crap that you used to be. I guess what they say is true nice guys all ways finsh last,but we finish with the best. So keep your head held up high like me,and when i found out why women play the games they play. You will know cuase i will write a book on it. It will be a best seller. Have a great grand and wonderful day peace n lov iceman
2 people like this
• United States
4 Feb 07
ricknkae, that is the problem! they marry a guy like I am now and then when a guy like I use to be comes along I get hurt because they act out their fantasy with them rather thay who they have at home, thinking the whole time "good 'ol mee is going nowhere since if I get cought I'll bat my eyes and he will accept my appology". It is crap since if I were that peice of crap they dream about then it would all be good since it would be "get in, get off, get out." and I would have all sorts of disposible income since I would have a single pad without this 4 bedroom home, lower water bills, lower electricity, etc... Not to mention the idea that she is all I dream about not anyone else so I have the constant nagging in the back of my head as to weather or not she is thinking about mee or someone else. I guess what I am saying is being a good guy SUCKS!! I hate being used and abused. I hate people walking all over mee because they know I am not the monster I use to be and I do not want any more trouble in my life. One of these days I swear to god I am going to snap and hurt somebody really bad, (won't phsycally be a woman as I do not believe in that type of stuff). I don't know maybe I am just ranting because I am pissed off and have been all day. Sorry for the rant and have a great day!!
@TiareF (241)
• United States
4 Feb 07
Hello iceman, Well, I for one have yet to meet an good guy. Let's see my ex-husband didn't start doing the flower thing till I divorced him and introduced him to his new girlfriend. (Yes, I introduced them. I don't hold grudges at least not against him LOL) My ex-live in was a badboy no doubt about it, self proclaimed and I was stupid. Now being single for almost 2 years, I have to say I have all the time in the world to wait for a good guy. I'm not getting into another screwed up relationship just to have someone in my life who wants to play games with my heart. In the long run it's not my heart I worry about anyway, it's my children who wind up getting hurt the worst and they are more important to me than anything else. Good luck at finding the answer, although I think men are just as bad at playing the games. They say they want a lady and all they want is a housekeeper or play toy till the newness wears off.
2 people like this
• United States
6 Feb 07
Thank you for your response. I agree your youngens should always come first. Don't put your heart cuase of it. If that makes any sence. I also agree that men play just as much games as women. why cuase we are stupid. point blank. On the other hands I stop playin games 7 years ago. i am 27 now. Thanks for the luck i will need it as much as possibe. I hope you find someone who is good to you and your younges. peace n lov iceman
1 person likes this
• Canada
3 Feb 07
You know, I've talked with quite a few guys about this and they all swear that "nice guys finish last." I'll admit that I've known a few women who got all out of joint over men who really DID treat them well... like you said, offering a jacket, sending flowers, keeping up with promised phone calls or emails... and then they'd say they felt smothered. Like the guy wouldn't give them any space. I believe some of them were scared that they'd found someone that they had conditioned themselves to believe just didn't exist. I don't get it, iceman LOL I must be old-fashioned too because, if a man chose to abuse me, I'd be watching for the door to hit him real hard in the a** on his way out. My husband's one of those "nice guys" and I wouldn't have him any other way. He still holds doors for women when we're out, opens the car door for me and such and, coincidentally, he's a Kentucky boy! I'd say don't give up. I had a "bad boy" phase when I was young (thankfully just in looks and not in behavior) and then I woke up. I LIKE being treated well and respected. I expect to get back what I give and I don't go running when I finally find it.
2 people like this
• United States
3 Feb 07
I just wanted to say that i like your response it kinda give me hope cause i am a kentucky boy and sounds like your husband is lucky to have found a lady like yourself and to never let it go cuase once it's so hard to get a lady peace n lov iceman
1 person likes this
@rosie_123 (6118)
3 Feb 07
Well Iceman, I think you are just unlucky! Most girls love their man to be a gentleman. and treat them with respect. If I wasn't aready in a relationship, I would just love you to bring me roses at work! LOL! No, seriously, it sounds like you are a nice guy and have been messed about quite badly. So just take a step back, relax, don't go looking for love, or trying too hard, and you will find the right woman for you one day. Good luck, and don't give up being the good person you are!
• United States
3 Feb 07
First of all i want to say thank you for response second I think your right if it wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have any luck at all. It just that i talk to women and they want all of this that and the other,and Iam the guy to give it to them and then it seems like they dont want it. Iam not looking for love right at this point in my life, but if i can find one lady just one who wants to be treated like a lady. Then maybe love might come in to play but it would probley be a while. peace n lov iceman
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Feb 07
Relationships are a tough thing I know but I just say stick to what you do and being yourself and let them deal with all of their other things that they have to deal with. All you can do is bring your part to the table and if they arent working for you then move on, but it is likely most women you deal with will play stupid games, but once you find the one who doesnt then you have to take advantage of it.
2 people like this
• United States
3 Feb 07
Thank you for your response and i def will hang on to the one that don't play games but she is really hard to find peace n lov iceman
• Canada
3 Feb 07
I would say you are running into a lot of woman who don't know what to expect from a guy who treats them right as they have never had this before . It can be intimidating to have something you want but are not used to the behaviour . If they have had bad relationships in the past , they might automatically suspect something just because you are being nice as this has never happened before .
2 people like this
• United States
3 Feb 07
Hey sugar, I wanted to say thank you for your respond, And that it seems to be that way. It's not just younger women its older women as well. If there is a good lady out there why are they all hiding. Just like another mylot user said I dont mean to say all women just the ones i run into. I have been all over the us so it's not like just here in ky. So if a women been in a bad relationship how can you get her to see a good one? You have a good day peace n lov iceman
• United States
4 Feb 07
unfortunately, so many women are jaded these days that they don't know how to react to a genuinely nice guy, and they wind up not trusting him. Maybe they've had bad experiences in the past, or they grew up with a poor example--parent's divorce, etc. I know when I was dating I always got guys who had been hurt by women when they were romantic and giving, so because of those other women's reactions I got the short end of the stick... no flowers, no romance, no dinners, no thoughtfulness. Fortunately, I married a nice guy, so it makes up for it, but I don't think you should give up. There's a girl out there just waiting to be appreciated by a loving and gentle soul like you.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Feb 07
Thank you for you response. I am glad to hear that you had found a great guy in your life that you could share with.If I do run into another women like that how can i show her that i won't treat her like that before she runs off. Cause it seems like that girl out there waiting for me has alredy been hurt,and she just needs some tlc peace n lov iceman
• United States
4 Feb 07
maybe you could start out slow at first with the romance. Not show her just how nice you are, and when she opens up to you about where and when she's been hurt, be there for her, but don't overdo it. I've seen guys who really took on the burden of hurt that their ladies went through only to have it backfire on them. Just be yourself, but enough that you won't get hurt too. :)
1 person likes this
@ricknkae (1726)
• United States
3 Feb 07
I feel sorry for you but it is not because you have had a few bad experiences that you must extend it to all the women. It is like saying all men are pigs because some are. Not everybody is alike and that what makes the world interesting because we are all different. So I would advise to look for a lady instead of a "chick". LOL Anyway I think it is very romantic to open doors and giev your jacket. Women need to be treated with respect as everybody else. Maybe just don't overdo it ... Maybe they think that it is suspicious that you are so nice or maybe thet are just afraid you might want to control them ... Anyway keep being yourself, don't overdo it and I am sure you will find the right one ;-) Good luck
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Feb 07
Well there is not need to feel sorry for me. I am not looking for a pitty party. I want to say thank you for responding to my discussion. I don't think I am overdoing it. On the other hand they might feel like i am trying to control them do to the fact. That they have never been treated like a lady so thank you peace n lov iceman
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Feb 07
You are right not all women just the ones in Az,mo,ks,ny,co,IA,(airzona,missouri,kansas,new york,corlodo,IOWA). Witch are states just incase you didn't know where I was talken about, but thanks for the goodluck I need all the luck i can get. Have a Beautiful day peace n lov iceman
1 person likes this
@adnan82 (673)
• Pakistan
4 Feb 07
man there are only few ppl left with a good heart... u ll.. find one soon :)
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thanks for your response. I hope your right cuaes i am getting older ahhhhhhhhhh just playin I think it would be nice to find one peace n lov iceman
@arwenrey (316)
• Philippines
4 Feb 07
Not all women likes to play games in fact there are also some men who likes to play games too. You're just not lucky to meet the right woman for you. Ask God for guidance so that He can lead you to the path of the perfect woman for you.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thank you for your response. Your right there are some guys that play as much as women do. The one's that don't play games is the one's get's the women who dose and that sucks. I do ask God for guidance and in hopes he will lead me closer to him and wife who loves me for me who also will follow him. peace n lov iceman
@shomomo (850)
• Israel
4 Feb 07
Oh my god I hate those games, they always live me stumbled and I have no idea what to do next. Stop with the games, be honest and just go for what you want, you want us back? tell us, you want us to go? tell us, don't hint, don't play games.
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thanks for your response. I agree with you I hate them probley more than you do. I am always honest when it comes who and what i stand for and in relationships some times it hurts to tell the truth but i still do it peace n lov iceman
• Pakistan
4 Feb 07
It's because they don't think heart as a part of budy. They think heart as an instrument or as an armour or as a toy or maybe as a glass. They can play with it or can break it up into pieces.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thank you for your response. I was thinkin of that too. I am not for sure after hearing the response from the others but I can see that in some women. peace n lov iceman
@rmuxagirl (7559)
• United States
4 Feb 07
I like my man to be old fashion. I simply melt when my man gives me his jacket when I am cold or brings me flowers just because. I like to have doors opened for me to an extent ( dated a guy who would not allow me to open my own doors). I like men that are true gentlemen...
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thank you for your respones. I am glad to hear that you like to be treated like lady. I just wish i could find one. If you have one hold on to him. and if you don't have one i live in ky lol peace n lov iceman
• India
4 Feb 07
Ofcourse.Ladies or I should say the fancy women always like themselves to be treated well and get respected.They want to get in contact with so many persons nd youngsters.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thanks for your response. If ladies like that point where they are hiding cuase all i find are women who has gotten hurt and so they dont know how to act when they do get a gentleman. peace n lov iceman
@Ajaygosh (137)
• India
4 Feb 07
this question should be answered by a women only becox she only knows the corret reason but according to them men are toys to play for them. its natural they love the bad without knowing that he is bad and keep on trying to change that person and after he changes they will be expecting the bad...The ultimate idea behind this is they think that they can do anything according to their wish thats it........
• United States
5 Feb 07
Thank you for your response. Why are men just toys to play with. Don't you think us men have feeling too. We are human and do have emotestions just as well as women do. Well sugar let me let you in on a secret about most men. Behind our coat of armor there is this thing called a heart. Big,small,black,cold,warm,or red filled with love it's still there and when it gets crushed it still hurts peace n lov iceman
@ritak3 (52)
• India
4 Feb 07
its not just girls who treat guys like that but if you ask girls, they expect something from guys. i understand that you get to know your girls expectation and accordingly you behave. but lemme tell you something you dont have to behave, you need to be yourself. why dont you let your girls know that what you expect from them rather than asking them that what they expect from you. i know you have been good and bad both ways to girls but you found girls playing with you. If you are really serious about your life and getting a life partner so keep the expectation clear enough to each other. it feels really good when you date someone for the first time but after couple of dating you get to know the person much closely and you decide that, this is not your type. so at the very first meet just dont start loving but be friend and try to know each other instead of just concluding that you are in love. Love is really precious, you should know how to preserve and also search the one which you deserve.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Feb 07
Thank you for your response. I don't try to be with a women just so i can fall in love with her. If I do happen to fall back into love with someone i have been dating it will after i have dated her a while, but i understand what you are saying about me expect from them instead of askin what do they expect from me. See i am me for me and if you don't like it then sorry. I told the last girl i dated I was sorry that she dated azzholes, but dont compare me to them cuase i wont be like them and its not fair to me to try to compeate with all the azzes in the world its hard enough just to impress someone and do it as long as yall are together. Cause i am a strong beliver the day you stoping making her happy is the day she says goodbye peace n lov iceman
• United States
4 Feb 07
Sometimes I think women are afraid of a good man. They think it is too good to be true, so they chase you away. Sometimes there are men that try to put on a good show for you, and then you open your heart just to find out that they aren't really one of the good ones at all. You can never bee to old fashion. There are women like me that still want doors opened for them, they would love your jacket when it is cold etc. I hope you find one that can really appreciate the man you are.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Feb 07
Thank you for your response. I know the old saying if it is to good to be true then it probly is. How do you show a women that you are a good guy with out getting run off first or show them your not just all talk and no action? i hope i can find that lady who everyone says that is right for me that would be sweet. peace n lov iceman
• China
4 Feb 07
to enjoy themselves,i think ,they also like men,they lovelife and they also want to say they can play game as better than men
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Feb 07
Thank you for your response. If that is the case just to prove to men they can play games better than us. Would say that is messed up. peace n lov iceman
@not4me (1713)
• United States
4 Feb 07
It's not just about how you treat your lady. You can treat her like a princess but if the chemistry isn't there she won't want to stay with you. These girls might not have thought you were that attractive but didn't have the heart to tell you to your face and if that chemistry isn't there, there is no saving the relationship. As for why they like bad men, it might be a self-esteem issue but I guarantee those women were more attracted physically to those other guys initially.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Feb 07
Thanks for your response. I understand if you dont have the chemistry and women just being nice and not wanted to tell your to your face,but in this case its a we bit diffenrt cuase she told my friend i was verry attractive (witch i think she is blind) cuase i am just ok, but anyways she tells me everything is going fine, but tells my friend. Witch she knows will tell me that she don't think it can go any where. So on one hand she tells me everything is fine and on the other she saying it is not. To me that is playin games cuase if there wasn't any chemistry then she could say i dont think this is going to work from jump street you know. She could go for the all time kill and say lets just be friends. peace n lov iceman
• United States
4 Feb 07
If you ever do get an answer fo this let me know. I've been running into that all my life. I'm the good, nice guy who always finishes last. I even had a woman say she wished she would have been with me way back when, then maybe her life would have turned out different. This bad boy game is getting old and I wish women wouldn't play it. This is just me ranting here I guess.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Feb 07
Thanks for your response. Like I told another mylot user when I truley find out the answer to this question I will write a book on it and it will become a best seller. I am verry impressed with some of the response its going to hard to pick one for best response just read the response that i have recived and maybe it could give you a light on the subject like it has me there really good peace n lov iceman