broken family

Philippines
February 7, 2007 2:08am CST
this is really hard to the family especially the kids. they will be the most affected in the situation when their parents decided to separate. have they really consider the feelings of their children before they decide to break apart? i really cant understand why there are lot of cases of couples who decided to separate after few years of marriage. they should have give ample of time to think before getting into relationship, marriage and separate. well, i guess they have their reason also where its out of their control and have to end up this way. but still, things gets complicated when they already have kids.
2 responses
@Ciniful (1589)
• Canada
7 Feb 07
Yes, a seperation or a divorce is very hard on the kids. But it's much harder for them to be in a home surrounded by tension or fighting. You're right, couples should give things more time before getting married, many couples don't. But then, there are many that do, and for one reason or another, it still doesn't work. Often people change after marriage, often other circumstances get in the way. The end result is that when it comes down to choices, you're left with two. 1. Stay in the relationship, allowing the children to be involved in the tension, arguments, etc. Studies prove this is damaging and detrimental to the kids in every aspect, emotionally, psychologically, mentally. Later in life, the kids will often end up in similar relationships. 2. Disolve the relationship. Again, studies prove that children with happily divorced parents fare much better than children being raised in a family that should have disolved.
2 people like this
• Philippines
7 Feb 07
well maybe its better for them to separate if they are not happy anymore with each other. they just have to expalin well the children and not to forget their responsibilities to them even after the divorce because there are some parents who act as if they are single again and forgot that they have kids to be taken care of.
@Ciniful (1589)
• Canada
7 Feb 07
Yes, but that's an issue of neglectful parenting, not an issue that has to do with whether people should stay in a relationship or not ... they're seperate issues altogether. The same father that forgets his responsibility to his children after a divorce is the same kind that will walk out on a pregnancy. All that boils down to bad parents, not bad spouses.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
7 Feb 07
i agree with you.
• Philippines
7 Feb 07
I am not married but i am a single mom who was in a live in relationship for 6 years and i tell you,when you are in a relationship where all you do is argue and there are so much tensions in your relationship..it is much better to separate then let children see and hear how their parents quarrel almost everyday..this can be very traumatic for children..its not wrong to be separated as long as you let your children know the real reason behind it..A lot of children from broken families do grow up normal and succeed in a lot of things then children who were brought up in a family of conflicts around them.
@Ciniful (1589)
• Canada
7 Feb 07
Absolutely. I come from a broken home .. in fact, most of the people I know do .. it's more common than an intact family these days. My mother left my father, married my step dad a few years later. Where with my father, all I saw was bickering, fighting and abuse ... quite the opposite once we became a 'broken' family. My life with my mom and stepdad was much more peaceful and condusive to a stable home.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 Aug 07
its good that you two were able to handle and cope up with the situation. i know it's not really easy but you were able to move on and have a life of your own. its really nice to hear that you two are doing okay. (",)