Is religion important in a relationship?
By irreverent
@irreverent (68)
Philippines
February 16, 2007 9:53am CST
I have a friend who is a Roman Catholic while his girlfriend is a Muslim (a royalty, I believe). They love each other and are not bothered by their difference in religion, but both of their parents disapprove of their relationship. That's why they told their respective parents that they have broken up when in fact they still see each other secretly. I told my friend that sooner or later their parents will find out and it might escalate into something worse for their respective families. He is confused and doesn't know what to do because he really loves the girl and she loves him also.
If you were in his shoes, will you fight for the girl or just forget her and find someone else who has the same religion as yours so as to avoid any complications?
9 people like this
81 responses
@smbilalshah (1316)
• Pakistan
16 Feb 07
well i dont know abt love n stuff but i do know one thing that being a muslim woman u cant do that, what she is doing in the story as described, and by the way for her parents who r now uncomfortable with it, its probably their fault too, because if they would have brought her up in a religious environment then she wouldnt have fallen in that situation, in islam there is nothing such as premarital relations between young juveniles
@countdown21 (111)
• United States
17 Feb 07
Yes, the right "religion" is important in a relationship...
My opinion is that you have several wrongs here:
1. The parents are wrong in that they didn't instilled in the couple a God they could go to for answers.
2. You are correct, the couple is wrong to live a lie; it will eventually cause things to escalate. Wrong actions always result in bad consequences
3. "Religion" is wrong. Roman Catholic, Muslim or any other one. The key is to have "a personal relationship" with God. The closer you are to the "perfect One," Jesus Christ, the closer who can get to everyone around you. True Christianity is not "religion" is it a personal love relationship with God via Jesus Christ.
Conclusion: Because neither family has the right foundation for what's important in relationships; the couple is "confused."
The key is for couples to have "the same, right relationship with God."
countdown21.com
@quadium32 (129)
• United States
17 Feb 07
I beleive that it is important that a couple shares the same religious beliefs, otherwise conflicts will arise later that could just cause problems in the relationship. Whenever they do, they can be more open with each other and supportive of each others opinions and ideas. With different religions, if one believed their spouse was condemned, it seems they would spend their life trying to "convert" their spouse.
@Mitraa (3184)
• India
17 Feb 07
At first the humanitarian factor and then the religion. Nothing comes in between these two. No human quality of any religion will approve the social deviation caused by the parents / children of such affairs. In my view, keeping the better worth of humanity and religious parameters, both the loving individuals should be given socio-religious approvals by persons of each religion and also their superiors wholeheartedly. Because noble saying is, "Marriages are already made in Heaven and only celebrated on Earth!" Wish you all the best! Thanks.
@GuateMom (1411)
• Canada
16 Feb 07
I think religion is only a major factor in a relationship if the couple allows it to be. In this case, they are letting it become a problem by not standing up to their parents. THis bodes ill for a long term relationship!
@Qcorianne (26)
• United States
16 Feb 07
I agree with you, GuateMom. You cannot allow other people to dictate whether you will or will not pursue a relationship with someone. By not standing up to their parents in the beginning, they are sending the message that their parents will always be able to manipulate them.
As for religion's role in a relationship, your religion should govern your behavior, not your choice in a spouse. The fact that she is a muslim will be problematic on her family's side of the matter, but if she truly loves him it shouldn't matter. The point of marriage is to seperate from your parents and become a part of your spouse.
While most people insist that you must have the same religious ideals as your spouse, even two christians married to each other cannot fit that requirement. Religion is a personal mindset, and will never be the same between even two people who follow the same doctrine.
@gramskaren (661)
• United States
17 Feb 07
I believe one should follow there heart. If they are truly in love it will survive. They will find out what is right for them. My family is Roman Catholic and we all went to catholic school and my mother made sure we went to church every sunday and holy day. There was 8 of us and now only a couple of us have remained catholic and the rest are a different religion and my mother does not like that at all. She can even be pretty rude at times about it. So religion is not always a factor in love. That is my opinion.
@trance_g (15)
• Philippines
17 Feb 07
I make it a point that whoever I have a relationship with believes in the faith that I have. As much as I respect other religions, I do this because I think that there are fundamental differences in religion. So to avoid conflicts/clashes about our beliefs, I look for a person with the same religion. I guess, I do this too so my kids would not go through the confusion of which religion is better. I don't have kids yet, just looking into the future.
@tw99384 (259)
• Jodhpur, India
17 Feb 07
I don't think religion is important in a relationship. I was a roman catholic and my husband is a anglican. Both are married for the last 15 years and have no hang ups on religion. Infact I became a protestant on my own account. Ours was a love marriage and we never discussed religion at all before marriage!
@nafeesa_mohd (281)
• India
17 Feb 07
both of them has to think about this... when they're in love it might seem alright... but when they begin their life... esp when they have a kid... problem might come in that child's religion... he/she cant be a catholic muslim.... religion is not a factor in relationship... but still we need to consider it....
@livvy092002 (1032)
• Philippines
17 Feb 07
I believe in the saying, "True love finds a way." I believe he should fight for their love no matter what. I believe that nothing can break apart two people who truly love each other.. even differences in religion will not be a hindrance for true love.
@msbawangada (710)
• India
17 Feb 07
I think , Religion is not important in relationship.
Because every day we meet many person and it is dosen't matter that which person is follow any religion.
If we will follow Religion than we can't make relation with unknown person .
@gaurav123 (5)
• India
17 Feb 07
Religion does not matter a lot if both the families of te girl and the boy are having no objection in their marriage.
Because marriage is not a combination of a husband and wife, it is a unification of two souls and two families also. So, everybody should be in favour of such relationship, then only you should proceed in such relationship.
@ranjith_alimi (9)
• India
17 Feb 07
Its not that he and she has really sacrificed for their parents now....if their parents really love them and understand their true love later by the time where one or both of them gets married then totally 8 people are gonna suffer for their life time that they have ,made a great mistake........
1. the boy ....2,3.his parents
4.girl.......5,6.her parents
7.boys wife
8.girl's husband
so what i wanna say is that one them should be bold enough to explain their parents how much they love each other......else there is no meaning for their true love....what do you say my frnd....
@tatzkie (644)
• Philippines
17 Feb 07
Wow.. this kind of love relation keeps on reoccuring in our place. it happen to our own family. my mom is roman catholic and my dad is a muslim with royal ancestry. Sadly it didnt worked out well. Main reason was religion. But on the contrary.. i believe that religion should not bar anyone with different beliefs to love and succeed. It is actually a matter of choice and will to make such relationship work. Love trancends everything and is the only thing that can bend even the strictest laws.
So... i say.. Go for it if you trully love the person.
@aries6484 (279)
• India
17 Feb 07
what did you get that doubt?you have to choose one or the other path.at a time you cannot walk on paths.but if you love agirl sincerely then you should not have religion feelings.after human being religions were born but human being religions did not born
@twistedangelwings (350)
• Australia
17 Feb 07
I think religion has the potential to be important in a relationship. I was raised in a very strict Roman Catholic family but today I am non practising and I'm not one much for any organised religions. I wouldn't particularly care what religion my partner was as long as he didn't expect me to follow the same belief system. I do however see a lot of potential problems in relationships if both parties are practicing different religions. The idea of children and the religion they would grow up with would probably be one issue.
I would fight for the partner but that is probably really only because my real lack of a religious system today. At the end of the day if both parties had a good sit down and chat about their differences and if they truly believed they could make the relationship work despite the differences, and would be able to handle the potential of kids and deciding what religion they would be raised with, then I would fight for the partner any day.
@florist2007 (29)
• Uganda
17 Feb 07
To peeple who hold their faith with high regard like me I wouldn't even fall in for a woman of a nother faith. this is because a person who subscribes to a particular faith should do it with all his heart unless he/she does not believe much in what he/she believes. Religion has a lot of good it does to a relationship if the parties involved are all committed to it. Love is not blind as many people think. before one falls in love they should accurately weigh the cost. Otherwise, many have gone mad with love only to regret later. I have counselled many couples of that catagory. they go against their faith but when they can move on they come back for help. Be warned
@asish1672 (338)
• United Arab Emirates
17 Feb 07
Yes I think religion is important. We all know that each religion has its own way and beliefs and the major ones like christanity, Islam and Hinduism are quite different from each other. Therefore people brought up in different religion will have different values. This difference might create a problem in married life. This might not seem to be a problem in the beginning but might crop up when the initial exitement eases out.
It is useless to think after you leap. So since your friend has already into the relationship its no point backing out. He should have thought this before getting serious about the relationship. If I were in his position I would have continued with it because parents cant abondon their kids and will ultimately agree to it when they see that their daughter and son is happy.
@sacredzac (11)
• India
17 Feb 07
love is very tricky. u just dont get to choose. it happens and happens so fast that u dont even when it hits u!!!
to be frank, i really have no answr to this.if i fight for the girl, then im leaving my family to face the wrath of the society and if i leave the girl for my family..well, i will not only be shateering the trust my girl had for me but also acquiring a guilt which will haunt me for the rest of my life!!!
thats why i pray to love the girl i marry rather than praying to marry the girl i love!!!!!!!!!
