Is it right for your significant other to tell u what to do?

United States
February 16, 2007 11:11pm CST
In my past relationship he told me he loved me and he chose me for me and that he liked me for my personality and that i was pretty and all that good junk. But he told me that he wanted me too loose weight so that he could show me off to his friends and that i can look good in a swimsuit. He is the typical gymrat, muscle man. He dictated where we ate more or less dictated what I ate. Is that right for him to tell me that I need to loose weight just because he wants to show me off? Is it also right for him to dictate things for me to do and how to be in other aspects of my life?
2 people like this
5 responses
• United States
17 Feb 07
No, it's not ok for someone to tell you what to do, and to make you do it, unless you agree whole-heartedly with what they said. It's unfair and screams overly controlling abusive behavior to me.
3 people like this
@kyekye (123)
• Australia
17 Feb 07
It really makes me angry when I hear of men telling their partners what to do, how to live etc. No-one has the right to do that!!! Just because he is a gym junkie doesnt mean you have to be!!! Sounds like he just wants a trophy-wife, to show off, tell him if he really loves you, he would accept you the way you are! If you are happy with the way you are, then he should be too! Dont let him try to change you! If you lose weight, it should be for YOU, not him. It is not right that he treats you like this!!!!! I wish you the best of luck, be strong and stand up to him!!!!!!!
• United States
17 Feb 07
If he is telling you to lose weight that is not right. At least not for the reason he told you he wanted you to lose. If he was telling you that for health reasons that would be one thing but not to just show you off. You have a mind and a intelligence that is there also. No one has the right to tell you what to eat. It doesn't sound like he chose you for your personality but for the fact that you listen and do what he says.
@lynninky (491)
• United States
18 Feb 07
you said past relationship so I am glad you are out of that.most females in very loving relationships find it hard to breakaway or stay away from the males. These men love to control women.It seems as if they have to do it to feel to about themself..You said he liked you are your personality but it sounds like he only wanted something to show off to his friends...THIS IS NOT RIGHT !!!! If he loved/loves you he will coming running back to you and tell you that he loves you no matter what....If someone is ashamed of you that is his problem not yours.If you are happy with yourself ,you will find someone who loves you for who you are. Hang in there and never take this kind of treatment ever again..
1 person likes this
@lonnieN (428)
• United States
27 Feb 07
so your pretty but not pretty enough??? he wants you to lose weight so he can show you off??? this guy loves you??? or are you a peice of meat to him??? he chooses what you eat??? you are beautiful you are a daughter of the KING you need to find a man who loves you more than he loves himself!!