Advice needed. me sad:(

February 20, 2007 7:19pm CST
i dont really know wot to do anymore so if any1s got any advice on this situation it will be much appreciated! Basically my very first boyfriend who lives in a different county to me and did wen we were together came to c me 2 or 3 weeks ago. were still really good friends and try 2 c each other a couple of times a year. iv recently been able to admit to myself that i still have feelings for him and probably have done this whole time! (broke up about 3 years ago now) he doesnt know anything but im certain he doesnt feel that way about me. i want to tell him anyway coz its driving me mad but dont want to mess up the friendship. does any1 else love someone that doesnt love them back? lifes a b*tch isnt it lol
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4 responses
@tatzkie (644)
• Philippines
21 Feb 07
all i can say in that situation... never hesitate to tell him what you feel when the moment comes and dont let it pass without doing so. What IF's can only be resolved the moment you decide to end it by expressing it or doing it. What happens after will then make you realize whatever doubts you have and have reality on your end. Good luck! Be strong! You can do it! Carpe diem!
21 Feb 07
yeh thats wot i was thinking! i dont usually hesitate when it comes to things like this. but he means a lot to me and i dnt want him to feel awkward around me if i do tell him. But im thinkin i probably will! thank for the advice xx
@tatzkie (644)
• Philippines
1 Mar 07
I hope it did well!
@spr1967 (208)
21 Feb 07
I would say if the relationship is afriendship then maybe its best staying that way cos if you tell the dude how your feeling might not be too good, but on the other hand it may work out all fine and dandy Good luck
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21 Feb 07
yeh thats the two sides of the battle. dunno wot to do but thanks :)
@Wingedman (238)
• United States
31 Mar 07
I know this discussion is a month old at this point and I hope you have resolve your heart since, but if not here is my 2 cents. The worst thing in life is regret, the best thing in life is love. So what do you get if you regret never having the love you deserve because you chose to stay silent. If this man is as much of a friend to you as he is, he will understand even if he does not have the same burning passion for you. (Honestly, I don't know why he wouldn't based on your pic) Basically you have the two choices you outlined,1.) tell him and face the music, including potentially the love of your life, or being estranged from a friend for the rest of your life. Or 2.) Don;t tell him and live in tortured silence regretting your decision when he invites you to his wedding and the birth of his children as a "friend". I've sat in silence before and I regretted it for a while. Eventually I met a wonderful woman and am very happy. But during the intervening years I was miserable. Because I kept thinking what "could've been". Take a chance. Tell him what you feel. If he doesn;t feel as you do and spurns you because you told him then he really isn't that great a friend to start with and you don't need people with just limited capacity for friendship in your life. If he feels the same for you and you fall in love, invite me to the wedding. Either way the torture of not knowing what "could've been" will be over.
• United States
21 Feb 07
I know just how you feel. But the guy I like is in the same town that I live in. I see him almost everyday he is my brothers boss. Boy is he hot!!! I really like him but, I know he don't feel the same way. And I just got out of a 12yr bad marriage and I dont know if it's to soon to go chasing someone. But, for you I would let him know how you feel and it might come out to be the best thing in your life...That is a risk we all have to take now and again. I wish you the best in life!!
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