am I an inconsiderate mother?
By lucky_witch
@lucky_witch (2707)
Philippines
February 28, 2007 10:36am CST
i've been married with my husband for 5 years... we have two kids... ages of 2 and 5. my husband is having an affair with another woman for almost two years and ahalf... I did evrything to make our relatioship work out... i talked to them nicely (my husband and his girl) instead of a fight. I listened to his sentiments and i didnt force him to get rid of her as soo as possible... he told me to give him enough time. there comes a time that they made me believe that thy're through... but then once i've read in the cp of my husband that they will go to abroad... to continue their relationship there. I almost cry in pain... I felt betrayed. when i asked him... he will say that he dont know if he can leave her... Until this september I learned that they are living in the same house. So I decided to give it up.
There is a guy( a friend of mine) who've been there for me always. Last october... our love story started. he've been good to me and my kids. december when my husband admit to me that they were really living in the same house.
I felt a little guilt for having a relationship with my bf now... but I really do love him. i was touch by his love taht my husband did not give me for two years in our life... he's the one supporting as right now. He's a man who knows the meaning of responsibility.
Tell me can I make my kids understand me... or im being inconsiderate and i should leave my bf. I'll be glad to hear your thought.
2 people like this
5 responses
@Akeela (2078)
• Trinidad And Tobago
12 Apr 07
Wow sweetie your much stronger than me I dont know if I can face this because you married the same time i did and when my child you had yours so my dear your one of the lucky ones to find love after this and love your kids , wont of sit nicely with them i proberly be writing from a cell of something. I wish you all the best dont rush into anything to soon like another child until your secure and emotinally ready because baby blues can creep up on you.....
@ydnac22 (802)
• Philippines
28 Mar 07
Nope! you're not inconsiderate mother and im sure your kids will understand as they grow up.You're just a human being who full in love to a wrong person.Now you have your bf who loves you and support all your needs so isnt it time now to let go of your husband and face your new life with your new bf and your kids? I know we dont have divorce here just an annulment and it takes many years to proceses that plus its very expensive.All you have to do is told your husband to get away of your life and focus to his other girl.But ofcourse ask for financial support for your kids.Let go and move. You deserve to be happy. God bless
@arvee17 (730)
• Philippines
28 Feb 07
you are not an inconsiderate mother. i think, you've been lonely for quite some time now and that you are just longing for love. the best thing that you can do is divorce your husband first. try to find yourself first and your true value... and if you think that you really love your bf now then that is how you feel, go for it. but of course i suggest that as what i have said already, is to give yourself a time to heal. what happened to you is not that easy. having a husband who didn't give you the importance and respect that you need. let your self be alone for a while just to meditate on things and to give your children a little bit of a transition before you pore yourself to another guy. that way, they wouldn't think you easily gave up on their dad. although, their father already gave up on them. hope you catch my point!
@visvambhari (200)
• India
28 Feb 07
I feel it will be better if you get divorce and marry your boy f.you can also ask him if he is ready to accept your kids. but just in case you are not interested in marrying your F it will be better your kids do not know about this frienship. They are too young and when they get older they will definitely understand your feelings.But you should not neglet your responsibilities as a mother.We all need true love and there is nothing wrong in accepting it.people are afraid of society and try to live a hypocratic life. I am personally against hypocrisy.
@all4ucnc (861)
• United States
28 Feb 07
Get rid of the first trouble (divorce the husband). Keep your new bf close but, not too close,(don't marry right away). Give yourself a chance to settle into your new life of being husband free, it also allows the kids to get use to this transition as well, instead of simply replacing daddy. Don't rush things take your time, and if it's right then start your new life with your new bf.
